And just after I'm shown the exact herb needed to complete the immortal elixir, my head clears as though it never happened. So I reach for my bag, fumbling for a scrap of paper and a pen, jotting down the final step when Ava appears. "I made the portal!" she says, her face lighting up as her eyes meet mine. "I didn't think I could do it, but this morning when I sat down for my usual meditation, I thought: What could it hurt to give it a try? And the next thing I knew —" "You've been here since morning?" I say, taking in her beautiful dress, designer shoes, heavy gold bracelets, and jewel-adorned fingers. "There's no time in Summerland," she scolds. "Maybe so, but back home it's past noon," I tell her, watching as she shakes her head and frowns, refusing to get bogged down in the tedious rules of the earth plane.
"Who cares? What could I possibly be missing? A long line of clients wanting me to tell them they're about to become extremely rich and famous despite all evidence to the contrary?" She closes her eyes and sighs. "I'm tired of it, Ever. Tired of the grind. But here, everything's so wonderful, I think I might stay!"
"You can't," I say, quickly, automatically, though I'm not sure it's true.
"Why not?" She shrugs, lifting her arms to the sky and twirling around and around. "Why can't I stay here?
Give me one good reason."
"Because —" I start, wishing I could just leave it at that, but since she's not a child I'm forced to come up with something better. "Because it's not right," I finish, hoping she'll hear me. "You have work to do.
We all have work to do. And hiding out here is like —cheating."
"Says who?" She squints. "You telling me all of these people are dead?"
I gaze around, taking in the crowded sidewalks, the long line for the movie theaters and karaoke bars, realizing I have no idea how to answer. I mean, just how many of them are like Ava —tired, fed-up, disillusioned souls who've found their way here and decided to drop out from the earth plane and never return? And how many of them have died and refused to cross over like Riley once did? I look at Ava again, knowing I've no right to tell her what to do with her life, especially when I remember what I've chosen to do with mine. Then I reach for her hand and smile when I say, "Well, at the moment, I need you. Tell me everything you know about astrology."
CHAPTER 37
"So?" I lean toward Ava, elbows pressed against the tabletop, trying to keep her focused on me as opposed to the sights and sounds of Saint-Germain.
"I know that I'm an Aries." She shrugs, her eyes preferring the River Seine, the Pont Neuf, the Eiffel Tower, the Arc de Triomphe, and the Notre Dame cathedral (which, in this version of Paris, are all lined up in a row), to me.
"Is that it?" I stir my cappuccino, wondering why I even bothered to order it from the cartoonlike garcon with the curlicue mustache, white shirt, and black vest, since it's not like I have any intention of drinking it.
She sighs, turning to look at me when she says, "Ever, can't you just relax and enjoy the view? When was the last time you were in Paris anyway?"
"Never," I say, rolling my eyes in a way she can't miss.
"I've never been to Paris. And I hate to break it to you, Ava, but this —" I take a moment to gesture around, pointing at the Louvre, which is placed right next to Printemps department store, which is next to the Musee d'Orsay, "—is not Paris. This is like some cranked up Disney version of Paris. Like, you've taken a pile of travel brochures and French postcards, and scenes from that adorable cartoon movie Ratatouille, mixed them all together and voila , created this. I mean, did you see the waiter? Did you notice how his tray kept tipping and twirling but never once fell? I doubt the real Paris has waiters like that." But even though I'm acting like the biggest party pooper ever, Ava just laughs. Swinging her wavy auburn hair over her shoulder as she says, "Well, for your information, this is exactly as I remember it. Maybe these monuments weren't all lined up in a row, but it's so much nicer like this. I did attend the Sorbonne you know. In fact, did I ever mention the time when I—"
"That's great, Ava. Really," I say. "And I'd love to hear all about it if I wasn't running out of time! So, what I meant to ask was, what do you know about astrology or astronomy or whatever it is that involves the various moon cycles?"
She breaks off a piece of baguette and butters the side, saying, "Can you be more specific?"
I reach into my pocket and retrieve the folded-up paper I scribbled on right after my vision, squinting at her as I say, "Okay, what exactly is a new moon and when does it occur?"
She blows on her coffee, peering at me when she says, "The new moon occurs when both the sun and moon are in conjunction. Meaning that when you're looking at it from the earth plane, they both seem to occupy the same part of the sky. And because of that, the moon doesn't reflect the light of the sun, which also means it can't be seen because its dark side is facing the earth."
"But what does it mean ? Is it symbolic of something?"
She nods, breaking off another piece of baguette when she says, "It's a symbol for new beginnings. You know, rejuvenation, renewal, hope —stuff like that. It's also a good time to make changes, drop bad habits —or even bad relationships." She gives me a pointed look.
But I just ignore that and move on, knowing she's referring to Damen and me, having no idea that I'm not just planning to end it, I'm planning to erase it. Because as much as I love him, as much as I can't imagine a future without him, I truly believe it's the best thing for everyone. None of this ever should've happened. We never should've happened. It's unnatural, not right, and now it's my job to put it all back.
"So when does that happen in relation to the full moon?" I ask, watching as she covers her mouth when she chews.
"The full moon occurs around two weeks after the new moon. It's when the moon reflects the maximum amount of light from the sun, which, from the earth plane, makes it appear full. When in reality, it's always full since it's not like it goes anywhere. Oh, and as far as symbols go? You want to know that right?" She smiles. "The full moon is all about abundance, completeness, a sort of ripening of things into their full powers. And since the moon's energy is strongest at this point, it's also full of magick power."
I nod, trying to digest everything she just said, and forming the smallest inkling of understanding for why these phases are so important for my plan.
"All the moon's phases are symbolic of something."
Ava shrugs. "The moon plays a powerful role in ancient lore and is said to control the tides. And since our bodies are mostly made up of water, some say it controls us too. Did you know that the word lunatic comes from the Latin word for moon, which is luna ?