It's my sign.
The one I've been waiting for all along.
Just when I'd given up hope, Riley pulled through.
Marking the smallest brownie on the plate with my initial in the exact same way that she used to do.
And when I look for the largest one and see an R carved onto it, I definitely know it's from her. The secret message, the sign she promised, right before she left me for good.
But still, not wanting to be some crazy delusional person who finds secret meaning in a plate of baked goods, I glance at Sabine and say, "Did you —" I point at my brownie, the one with my initial carved into its middle. "Did you put that there?"
She squints, first at me, and then at the brownie, then she shakes her head and says, "Listen, Ever, if you don't want to try it, then you certainly don't have to, I just thought —"
But before she can finish, I've already plucked it off the plate and plopped it into my mouth, closing my eyes as I savor its chewy sweetness, immediately immersed in the feeling of home . That wonderful place I was lucky enough to revisit, no matter how short a time —finally realizing it's not relegated to just one single place, it's wherever you make it.
Sabine looks at me, her face anxious, awaiting my approval "I tried them once before, but for some reason they didn't turn out nearly as good as your mom's." She shrugs, gazing at me shyly, eagerly awaiting my verdict. "She used to joke that she used a secret ingredient, but now I wonder if that might've been true."
I swallow hard, wiping the crumbs from my lips, and smiling when I say, "There was a secret ingredient."
Seeing her expression fall, wondering if that means they're no good. "The secret ingredient was love, " I tell her. "And you must've used plenty, because these are awesome."
"Really?" Her eyes light up.
"Really." I hug her to me, but only for a moment before I'm pulling away. "Today's Friday, right?"
She looks at me, her brows merged. "Yes, it's Friday.
Why? Are you okay?"
But I just nod and flee out the door, knowing I've even less time than I thought.
CHAPTER 49
I pull into Ava's drive, and park my car sloppily —back wheels on the cement, front wheels on the grass, moving toward the door so quickly I barely acknowledge the stairs. But just as I reach it, I take a step back—something feels weird, off, strange in a way I can't quite explain. Like it's too quiet, too still. Even though the house appears just as I left it—planters on either side of the door, welcome mat in place—it's static in a way that seems eerie. And as I raise my knuckles to knock, I've just barely tapped it when it opens before me.
I head through the living room and into the kitchen, calling out for Ava and noticing how everything is just as I left it —teacup on the counter, cookies on a plate, everything in its usual place. But when I peek in the cupboard and see that the antidote and elixir are missing, I'm not sure what to think. Not knowing if it means that my plan worked and it wasn't needed after all, or if the opposite is true, and that something's gone wrong.
I race toward the indigo door at the end of the hall, eager to see if Damen's still there, but I'm blocked by Roman who stands right before it. His face widening into a grin as he says, "So nice to have you back, Ever. Though I told Ava you would be. You know what they say —you can't go home again!" I take in his deliberately tousled hair that perfectly frames the Ouroboros tattoo on his neck—knowing that despite my advances, despite my waking the school, he's still the one in charge around here. "Where's Damen?" My eyes rake over his face, my gut twisting tight. "And what've you done with Ava?" "Now, now." He smiles. "Don't you worry 'bout a thing. Damen's right where you left him. Though I must say I can't believe that you left him. I underestimated you. I had no idea. Though I can't help but wonder how Damen would feel if he knew. I bet he underestimated you too." I swallow hard, remembering Damen's last words: You left me. Knowing he didn't underestimate me at all, he knew exactly which path I'd choose. "And as for Ava." Roman smiles. "You'll be happy to know that I've done nothing with her. You should know by now that I only have eyes for you, " he murmurs, moving so fast I've barely had a chance to blink when his face is mere inches from mine. "Ava left on her own accord. Allowing us our privacy. And now that it's just a matter of —" He pauses to glance at his watch. "Well—seconds really, until you and I can make it official. You know, minus all the nasty guilt you would've felt had we hooked up sooner—before he'd had a chance to pass . Not that I would've felt guilty, but you strike me as the sort who likes to think of yourself as good and pure and well intentioned and all that rubbish, which, truth be told, really is a bit too maudlin for my tastes. But I'm sure we'll find a way to work through all that." I tune out his words as I plan my next move. Trying to determine his weakness, his kryptonite, his most vulnerable chakra. Since he's blocking the very door I need to get through, the door that leads to Damen, I've no choice but to go through him. Though I need to be careful with how I proceed. Because when I do make a move, it needs to be swift, unexpected, right on target. Otherwise, I'm in for a battle I may never win.
He lifts his hand to my face and caresses my cheek, and I slap it so hard the crunch of his bones pierces the air as his crumpled fingers wobble and dangle before me.
"Ouch." He smiles, shaking his hand as he flexes his instantly healed digits. "You're a feisty one, aren't you? But you know how that only turns me on, right?" I roll my eyes, feeling his cold breath on my cheek as he says, "Why do you continue to fight me, Ever? Why do you push me away when I'm all you have left?"
"Why are you doing this?" I ask, my stomach twitching as his eyes darken and narrow, displaying a complete absence of color and light. "What did Damen ever do to you?"
He tilts his head back, peering at me when he says, "It's real simple, darlin'." His voice suddenly changing, dropping the British accent and adopting a tone I've never heard from him before. "He killed Drina. So I'm killing him. And then everything's even.
Case closed."
And the second he says it, I know. I know exactly how I'll take him down and get behind that door.
Because along with the who and the how, I've now got the why. The elusive motive I've needed all this time. And now the only thing standing between Damen and me is one solid punch to Roman's navel chakra, or sacral center as it's sometimes called —the center of jealousy, envy, and the irrational desire to possess.
One solid blow and Roman is history.
But still, before I take him down, I've one more thing to do. So I look at him, my gaze fixed and unwavering when I say, "But Damen didn't kill Drina. I did."
"Nice try." He laughs. "Pathetic, a bit maudlin like I said, but I'm afraid it won't work. You can't save Damen that way."
"But why not? If you're so interested in justice, an eye for an eye and all that —then you should know that I'm the one who did it." I nod, my voice taking on new urgency and strength. "I'm the one who killed that, bitch." Watching as he sways, ever so slightly, but still enough for me to notice. "She was always hanging around, completely obsessed with Damen. You must've known that, right? That she was totally fixated on him?"