He winces. Neither confirming nor denying, but that wince is all I need to keep going, knowing I've hit the sore spot. "She wanted me out of the way so she could have Damen to herself, and after months of my trying to ignore her and hoping she'd go away, she was dumb enough to show up at my house and try to confront me. And —well—when she refused to back down and went after me instead—I killed her." I shrug, relaying the story with a lot more calm than I felt at the time, making sure to leave out my own ineptitude, cluelessness, and fears. "And it was so easy. " I smile, shaking my head as though reliving the moment all over again. "Seriously. You should've seen her. It's like, one moment she was standing before me all flaming red hair and white skin—and the next—gone ! And by the way, Damen didn't show up until the deed was already done. So, as you see, if anyone's guilty, it's me and not him." My gaze is on his, my fists ready to strike, moving right into his space when I say, "So, what do you say? You still wanna date me? Or would you rather kill me instead? Either way, I'll understand." I place my hand on his chest and push him hard against the door. Thinking how easy it would be to just lower it a few inches, jab really hard, and be done with all this.
"You?" he says, the word more like a question, a crisis of conscience, than the accusation he meant it to be. "You and not Damen?"
I nod, my body tensed, poised for fight, knowing nothing will keep me from getting into that room, and raising my fist as he says, "It's not too late! We can still save him!"
I freeze, my fist hovering at the halfway mark, unsure if I'm being played.
Watching as he shakes his head, visibly distressed when he says, "I didn't know —I thought for sure it was him—he gave me everything—he gave me life—this life ! And I thought for sure that he—"
He moves around me and flees down the hall, calling, "You go check on him —I'll get the antidote!"
CHAPTER 50
The first thing I see when I burst through the door is Damen. Still lying on the futon, looking as thin and pale as he did when I left him.
The second thing I see is Rayne. Huddling by his side, pressing a damp cloth to his face. Her eyes growing wide when she sees me, her hand held up before her as she shouts, "Ever, no ! Don't come any closer! If you want to save Damen, then stop right there —do not break the circle!"
I gaze down, seeing some grainy white substance that looks just like salt, formed into a perfect ring that keeps the two of them in and me out. Then I look at her, wondering what she wants, what she could possibly have in mind cowering beside Damen and warning me away. Noticing how she looks even odder outside of Summerland with her ghostly pale face, tiny features, and large coal-black eyes. But when my gaze shifts to Damen, watching as he lights and struggles for each breath —I know I have to get to him, no matter what she says. It's my fault he's like this. I abandoned him. Left him behind. I was stupid, and selfish, and naive enough to think that everything would work out okay just because I wanted it to, and that Ava would stick around to pick up the pieces.
I step forward, my toe landing just outside the border as Roman rushes in from behind me and shouts, "What the bloody hell is she doing in here?" His eyes wide with shock as he gapes at Rayne, still crouching beside Damen from behind the barrier. "Don't trust him!" she says, her eyes darting between us. "He knew I was here all along." "I didn't know any such thing! I've never even seen you before!" He shakes his head. "I mean, sorry darlin', but Catholic schoolgirls just ain't my thing. I prefer my women a little more feisty, like Ever, here." He reaches toward me, trailing his fingers down the length of my back, chilling my skin in a way that makes me want to react —but I don't. I just take a deep breath and try to stay calm. Focusing on his other hand —the one that's holding the antidote—the key to saving Damen.
Because in the end, that's the only thing that matters —everything else can wait.
I snatch the bottle and unscrew the top. And I'm just about to penetrate Rayne's circle of protection when Roman puts his hand on my arm and says, "Not so fast."
I pause, glancing between them, Rayne looking me right in the eye when she says, "Don't do it, Ever!
Whatever he tells you, do not listen. Listen only to me. Ava dumped the antidote and ran off with the elixir not long after you left, but luckily I got here just before he did." She gestures toward Roman, her eyes like angry points of the darkest night. "He needs you to break the circle so he can get in, because he can't get to Damen without you. Only the worthy can access the circle, only those with good intent. But if you step in now, Roman will follow, so if you care about Damen, if you truly want to protect him, you have to wait until Romy gets here."
"Romy?"
Rayne nods, glancing between Roman and me. "She's bringing the antidote, it will be ready by nightfall since it needs the full moon's energy to be fully complete." But Roman just shakes his head, laughing as he says, "What antidote? I'm the only one with the antidote. Hell, I'm. the one who made the poison, so what the hell does she know?" And when he sees the confusion on my face, he adds, "I really don't see how you have much of a choice. If you listen to this one" —he flicks his fingers toward Rayne—"Damen will die. But if you listen to me, he won't. The math's rather simple, don't you think?"
I look at Rayne, watching as she shakes her head and warns me not to listen to him, to hold out for Romy, to wait for nightfall, which is still hours away. But then I gaze at Damen beside her, his breath becoming more labored, the color drained from his face — "And if you're trying to trick me?" I say, all of my attention now focused on Roman. Holding my breath as he says, "Then he dies." I swallow hard and stare at the floor, unsure what to do. Do I trust Roman, the rogue immortal who's responsible for all of tills in the first place? Or do I trust Rayne, the creepy twin with her covert double-talk and an agenda that's never been clear? But when I close my eyes and try to concentrate on my gut, knowing that it's rarely wrong, even though I often ignore it, it's frustratingly still. Then looking at Roman when he says, "But if I'm not tricking you, then he lives . So I really don't see how you have much of a choice —"
"Don't listen to him," Rayne says. "He's not here to help you, I am! I'm the one who sent you the vision in Summerland that day, I'm the one who showed you all the ingredients required to save him You were shut out of the akashic records because you'd already made your choice. And while we tried to show you the way, while we tried to help you and stop you from leaving, you refused to listen, and now —" "I thought you didn't know my business?" I narrow my gaze. "I thought you and your creepy sister couldn't access—" I pause, glancing at Roman, knowing I have to tread carefully with what I'm about to say. "I thought you couldn't see certain things."
Rayne looks at me, her face stricken, shaking her head as she says, "We never lied to you, Ever. And we never misled you. We can't see certain things, that's true. But Romy's an empath and I'm a precog, and together we get feelings and visions. That's how we first found you, and we've been trying to guide you ever since, using the information we sense. Ever since Riley asked us to look after you —" "Riley?" I gape, my stomach swirling with nausea. How could she be involved in any of this? "We met her in Summerland and showed her around. We even went to school together, a private boarding school she manifested, which is why we wear this." She motions to her plaid skirt and blazer, the uniform she and her sister always wear. And I remember how Riley always dreamed of going to boarding school, saying it was so she could get away from me. So it makes sense that she'd manifest one. "Then, when she decided to—" she pauses, glancing at Roman before she continues, "to cross over, she asked us to look after you if we ever saw you around." "I don't believe you," I say, even though I have no reason not to. "Riley would've told me, she would've . .." But then I remember how she once said something about meeting some people who showed her around, and I wonder if she was referring to the twins. "We also know Damen —he—he helped us once—a long time ago ..." And when she looks at me, I'm just about to fold when she says, "But if you could just wait a few more hours until the antidote's complete, then Romy will be here and ..." I glance at Damen, his emaciated body, his pale, clammy skin, his eyes appearing sunken, his breath ragged, every inhale and exhale progressively weaker—and I know there's only one choice to make. So I turn my back on Rayne and look at Roman when I say, "Okay, just tell me what to do."