She couldn’t be the reason her daughter got kicked out. She couldn’t be the reason her son lost his home.
“Oh god, Aidan. What was I thinking?”
His arms tightened. “Baby, baby, I know what’s going on in that head of yours, but it’s wrong.”
“I can’t be the reason we fail.” Tears pierced through her.
“Baby, we’re not failing.”
“I can’t lose our home. I can’t get us kicked out. I can’t do it again.”
Aidan sighed, pulling her so close she could barely breathe. “Lexi, that’s not going to happen. Baby, we’re going to be fine. No one can throw us off our land. I won’t allow it. Your momma was all alone. She didn’t have anyone to help her. You can’t think it was your fault.”
“She got kicked out because of me. What if I do the same thing to Chelsea? To baby Jack?”
Aidan forced her to turn around. “How do you feel about your mother, Lexi? Are you angry with her?”
Lexi shook her head. “Of course not. She’s the strongest woman I know.”
“Why? Why is she so strong? And don’t bullshit me, because I can get her over here in a heartbeat.”
Lexi let her tears flow. “She’s strong because she loved me.”
Her mother hadn’t faltered. She’d been seventeen years old, barely out of high school, and pregnant and alone. She’d managed to pull herself up and put herself through school. She’d taken care of them both. She’d educated herself.
Because she’d loved Lexi.
“I can’t be as strong as my momma.”
“You don’t have to be.” Aidan kissed her brow. “Baby, she doesn’t have to be anymore and I bet your mother would say she’s thrilled about that. You and I have been giving into our childhoods. You’re trying to be your momma and I’m trying to make up for everything my father didn’t give me. Lucas is the only one who’s fighting it.”
Because Lucas had been ignored. He’d been marginalized and he was standing up to the people he loved because he wouldn’t be that way again. He wouldn’t walk away because that man would never leave his children, but he would stand up for himself.
“I don’t want to live like this. I don’t want to hide things from you. I was stupid, Aidan.”
“No. Like I said, you should have clocked her. I have plans for her. Maybe it’s time to really unleash Lucas’s inner bastard and let him take that bitch down. Let Lucas be the man he wants to be.”
She smiled a little. “But he wants to be Jack.”
Her stepfather was known for being a man no one wanted to cross.
“Exactly. I’m not as smart as Lucas. I tend to fight my way through life when he can finesse it, and sometimes revenge requires finesse. I love you, Lexi. You’re not capable of finesse. You’re capable of tossing a bowl of punch over someone’s head. I’m capable of punching someone. Lucas is capable of taking apart someone’s life in such a way that no one even knows he did it.”
That summed up her dad. “I love you all so much. I don’t want to fail you.”
“Lexi, baby, you can’t fail us. We’re your family. The only way you fail is by walking away. Don’t walk away.” Her Master had tears in his eyes. He stared down at her like she was precious and she was. When he looked at her like that, she knew she was loved. Only a few humans in the world ever looked at her like that. Her husbands. Her mother. Her children.
Her family.
She couldn’t fail them. Like her mother couldn’t fail her. She’d been righteously strong, and she’d gained that strength from loving her child. Even though she didn’t need to be strong now, her love for Jack and Sam made her that way.
The only way Lexi had failed was in not talking to her men. “I want to slow down.”
Aidan’s mouth curled up. “Oh, my darling baby, you will slow down. I’ve been seriously lacking as a Dom. You aren’t going to the conference in Denver. You’re coming home with your family.”
The whole idea of going to the Denver conference had made her tired. Luckily it hadn’t been publicized that she would be there. She could get out of it. It was time to stop. She just said yes to everything and everyone, no matter what it cost her. She wanted to be home, cuddling with her babies. There would be time for conferences later when her men could be with her. “All right.”
Aidan was taking control. She wanted it. Needed it.
“I’m never going to tell you how to write or how much to write. The writing part is a piece of your soul, but the business part is different. I think Lucas should take control. You don’t like making all of these decisions. You just want to write. Tell me if I’m wrong.”
He wasn’t. “I’m not saying I won’t have ideas. I’m not a doormat, but at the end of the day, I just want to write my stories. I want to be successful, but I would rather someone else handled the money part. I just want to do the fun part.”
“And Lucas wants to help you. And I need you both to help me.” Aidan rubbed their cheeks together. “I need you to support me. I know you and Lucas are smarter, but the ranch is important.”
“We’re not smarter, just different.” But the whole idea of helping him filled a void inside her.
“Well, I need you both. You and Lucas have so much experience that I don’t have. I’m done with this whole feeling like shit thing. I’m necessary in this marriage. I love this family. Maybe I didn’t bring as much money into it, but damn it, I’m valuable.”
He thought he wasn’t? Her heart softened. “Oh, babe, of course you are.”
His lips touched hers, a fire sparking across her flesh. He only needed to kiss her to make her go up in flames. His arms wound around her. He pulled her close. Everything in Lexi responded to him. This was what she needed.
“I haven’t been valuable lately.” He said the words against her lips. “But I will be, Lexi. I can be what you need again. I will be. Eat that damn sandwich because you’re serving two Masters tonight.”
Her whole body clenched in anticipation.
She ate her food because she would need her strength.
Aidan led Lexi to the playroom. The doors were open, but he stopped them just outside. His heart softened as he saw Lucas sitting in the middle of the room, his gorgeous, lean body in a sitting position. Cobbler Pose. His feet were together, his hands behind his back.
When they had first gotten together, Lucas had wanted to join him in his daily yoga. Aidan needed it to feel flexible. His muscles tended to seize up after all the surgeries he’d required to fix the damage he’d taken in Iraq. So he and Lucas had gotten up with the dawn and moved through a series of yoga poses, starting with Sun Salutation and ending with Relaxation Pose.
He missed that. He would reinstate those mornings with his guy. Lexi and Lucas liked to sit together in the mornings and have their coffee. Aidan couldn’t stand the shit, but he could have his yoga time. And in the evenings he would shower with Lexi. She needed a shower before she could sleep. It could be their special time together.
They had to fight for it. Every day. Every hour.
They made the choice to be together.
All three of them. They needed time—each of them together, but they definitely needed time for the three of them to come together. “We need to join Lucas. Are you strong enough, baby?”
“I am. I need to be with you.” Tears filled her eyes. “I’ve missed you both so much.”
And he’d missed her. He and Lucas had been together, but not with the tenderness they had needed. They’d lived a half-life without her.
“Then come back to us. Come and complete us. We’ve been lost without you.” Aidan reached out, holding a hand to her. “We need you, baby. We don’t get what we need without you, but you have to decide to come with us. I won’t order you to do it.”