“And yet we must keep up good Godly appearances, isn’t that right, Laney?”
He turns his intimidating stare on me, but somehow, in the face of how manipulative he’s been about Shane and how he’s so openly antagonizing Jake, I don’t wither as much as I usually do.
“That’s probably the right thing to do, Daddy, but that doesn’t mean it’s the thing I’m going to do.”
“Laney, I didn’t raise you to—”
“This is not about how you raised me, Daddy. This is about you not being happy with my choices. But, lucky for both of us, you don’t have to be. I’m an adult and I can live my life how I see fit. I can make my own decisions and make my own mistakes. I can decide for myself who’s worthy of being part of my life and who’s not. That’s not your business. And it’s certainly not your role to mend a relationship that I’ve ended. In fact, I’d appreciate it if you’d just stay out of my life right now. I’ve got enough to worry about without staying awake at night wondering if I’ve disappointed you.”
Without meaning to, I’ve come to my feet, like I’m braced and ready for battle, and as much as I hate to cause a scene, I’ve done just that. I can feel every eye in the place focused on me. Evidently my voice rose as I did.
I turn to Jake.
“I’ve lost my appetite. You ready?”
Jake’s expression is curiously blank. “Sure.”
With that, he slides off his stool and holds out his arm for me to precede him. My father’s disdain is palpable. Jake’s apathy is, too.
I start to walk off with Jake, but Daddy grabs my arm before I can leave him and this humiliating conversation behind. “He’ll be through with you once he gets what he wants, Laney. Don’t waste your love on someone like that.”
Before I can respond, Jake does. “She won’t waste her love on me, sir. I’m unlovable. But you should trust her more because I’m sure she’s not.”
With a palm to my lower back, Jake urges me on. I keep my eyes straight ahead as we walk, avoiding all the accusing stares of the town folk. In their eyes, my father can do no wrong. But now I can.
My hands are shaking by the time we get to my car. “Here,” Jake says, taking the keys from my fingers. “I’ll drive.” He opens the passenger-side door for me then walks around and slides in behind the wheel. “I knew we should’ve brought the Jeep. What are you, an elf?” He has to scoot the seat back as far as it will go just to accommodate his long legs.
I don’t respond. I’m still too shaken by that run-in with my dad. I’ve never stood up to him that way, and I’m not sure I’m entirely comfortable with it. I don’t want him to think badly of me, but I also don’t want him meddling in my life so much. He’s got to let me go eventually.
I’m also embarrassed by the things he said to and about Jake. I know I should apologize or something, but I don’t even know where to start.
When Jake has started the car and pulled onto the main road, I give it a shot. “Jake, I—”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says abruptly.
“But I am worrying about it. I never wanted—”
“I know you didn’t. I get it. You think your dad is the first father to disapprove of me? Hell, my own father hated me. Why should yours be any different?”
His voice drips with bitterness, but something tells me that there’s more than that just below the surface, that somewhere deep down, he’s hurting because of it. But what am I supposed to do? Or say? I hardly know him. How can I comfort someone I don’t know? Over a situation I know nothing about?
“I’m sure that’s not true,” I assert weakly.
Jake’s only response is a single harsh bark of laughter.
TWELVE: Jake
Laney’s worked quietly all day. And I’ve let her. She’s got some shit to sort out on her own. She doesn’t need my help. And I wouldn’t know how to help her anyway. I suck at family issues. Actually, I suck at family period. Whatever part of me that might’ve been good at being in a relationship of any kind died with my mother a long, long time ago. I’ve learned since then that “stick and move” doesn’t just keep you from getting punched in boxing; it’s a philosophy that can help you survive real life, too.
Besides, I wouldn’t want to give Laney the wrong idea. That’s not what this is about it. It’s not what we are about. I don’t want her getting attached to me. Have some fun, yeah. Have some sex, hell yeah. But get attached? Not a good idea. I’m not the kind of guy she needs.
It’s getting close to dinnertime now, though, and I’ve got a mission to tend to—get Laney back in my bed tonight. And under me.
I figure it’s just a matter of time before she says it wouldn’t be right for us to share a room. What do I say? Bullshit! That’s a cop-out. If she wants to stop being a good girl, she can start with me. I’m about as good at bringing out the bad in a girl as a man can be.
And bringing it out in a woman like Laney will be the sweetest of all.
My phone rings as I cross the yard to the back door of the house. I glance at the Caller ID and see the department’s main number on the screen. I stop and hit the green button. After a few short sentences exchanged, I hang up and slide the phone into my pocket.
Just like that, in a single act as simple as answering the phone, my plans to seduce Laney tonight are shot all to hell. With a sigh, I continue on to the house, detouring toward the dining room where Laney works.
Her head is bent over the table, her eyes focused on some papers. When I lean against the doorjamb, it creaks, giving me away. Her head snaps up. When she sees me, her lips curve into a welcoming smile.
“I didn’t hear you. How long have you been standing there?”
“Just a few seconds. Didn’t mean to scare you.” I push away from the doorway and move to bend casually over Laney’s shoulder, as if to see what she’s working on. Her light scent teases my nose, and I heard her catch her breath when my chest brushes her arm. “What are you working on now?”
“Um, just the contents of the safe. There’s a lot of paperwork in there to go over.”
I can practically hear her pulse jumping around. I know she wants me. And I know it makes her uncomfortable. She doesn’t quite know what to do with it. But that makes only one of us, because I know exactly what to do with it! Just not tonight.
With a sigh, I straighten away from her. No sense getting both of us all excited when I have to leave.
Dammit!
“One of the other firemen called in sick. Seems like all the shit work is gonna go to the new guy. You know how that goes.”
Laney turns toward me. “Oh,” she says, disappointment clearly written across her face. Perversely, I’m satisfied to see it. “Okay. I’ll feed the dog until you get back.”
“No need. There are food and water dispensers for him out in the barn. He knows how to work them.”
“I wondered why he wasn’t very interested in the food I was giving him.”
“You fed the dog?”
“Of course! I bought some cans of food at the store. I thought you’d just left him here to starve.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
“Sort of. At first, I really did think that. But then, when he wouldn’t eat the food I put out, I thought maybe you’d made arrangements for someone to feed him elsewhere, like at a neighboring farm or something. I mean, he disappears for hours during the day. I figured he had to be eating somewhere.”
“I appreciate your confidence in me, but—”