Ben didn’t hear Brian’s snappy comeback. His chest felt tight and his breath short as he hurried to make himself presentable. Was he excited? Nervous? Did he have a right to be either of these or was that the beginning of infidelity?
Steadying himself, he walked to the reception area, resisting the urge to run. Only one person waited there, and he was indeed breathtakingly beautiful. Silky blond hair framed his young face. His complexion was perfect, his mouth delicate and pink next to the black lip piercing. His blue eyes looked Ben over before settling into a scowl. The anger only accentuated his handsomeness.
“You’re Benjamin?” the boy asked.
“Ben,” he corrected, having already put the pieces together. This wasn’t good.
“So much for the legend.” The beauty faded momentarily, overshadowed by hate.
“And you are?”
“Ryan, Tim’s boyfriend.” He waited for a reaction, disgusted when none came. “What, he never told you about me?”
“I haven’t spoken to Tim in years.”
Emotions played across Ryan’s face—doubt, suspicion, sorrow. How young was he? Still a teenager, that was certain. Ben suddenly felt old. He thought back to his emotionally tumultuous adolescent years. What would he have wanted to hear if he were Ryan?
“You’ve got nothing to worry about,” he said. “I’m happily married. I’m not interested in Tim anymore.”
Ryan’s handsome visage returned to anger. “That doesn’t mean he’s not interested in you. I know he’s been coming here, so you can stop with the lies.”
Ben sighed. He wouldn’t be able to defuse this situation. Better to retreat and let them sort it out at home. “I have to go, but I hope you two work things out,” he said, turning to leave but stopping when he saw Brian standing in the doorway.
“Another one for you,” he said, looking concerned.
Tim stepped out from behind him. The last few years hadn’t been kind. He had circles under his eyes and stubble covered his chin. Even his once-invincible physique had grown paunchy. He appeared vulnerable and uncertain, until he spotted Ryan. Then his face became a mask of fury that Ben hadn’t seen since they parted as teenagers.
Oblivious of their surroundings, Tim and Ryan began shouting at each other. Ben stared in shock before shooing Brian away, promising to lock up. By the time he returned his attention to the conflict, Tim had grabbed Ryan’s arms and was shaking him and yelling. Ryan was alternating between crying and shouting back.
“Let go of him!” Ben growled, adrenaline taking over. “I said let go!” When neither man paid any attention to him, he pulled on Tim’s shoulder. Tim rounded on him, eyes blazing before his face crumpled.
“That’s right, show him how you treat me,” Ryan yelled, lifting the sleeves of his black concert T-shirt. His arms were bright red where Tim had gripped him, but there were also bruises. “Did he do this to you, too?” Ryan demanded. “Is that why you left him?”
Ben turned to Tim, jaw clenching, but his former boyfriend couldn’t meet his gaze.
“I’m going to kill myself,” Ryan bawled, heading for the door. “I’m going to kill myself and leave a note blaming it on you!”
The door slammed, the glass shaking in its frame. The silence that followed was filled only with Tim’s heavy breathing. Ben could smell alcohol on his breath, much more than the theater would serve.
“I guess I should go after him,” Tim said.
“I guess you should.”
Tim turned when reaching the door.
“La Maisonette, tomorrow. Seven o’clock?”
Ben hesitated.
“Please?”
“All right.”
Tim slunk into the night wearing a burden of shame. Ben was tempted to lock the door after him, but he didn’t. He still trusted Tim, still knew him. There had to be a reason for everything he’d seen tonight, and he wouldn’t be able to rest until he found out why.
* * * * *
Tim was already at the restaurant, seated at a table and waiting. His appearance was better than it had been the day before, face clean shaven and hair freshly cut. He still didn’t look as though he’d slept recently. Ben sat, not knowing what to expect and warily noting the half-empty bottle of wine on the table.
“I’m sorry about yesterday,” Tim said, lifting the bottle. “Drink?”
Ben nodded. He didn’t plan on drinking but he figured it was one less glass for Tim.
“Is your boyfriend okay?”
“Ryan? Yeah, he says stuff like that all the time.”
“And do you react like that all the time?”
Tim’s expression was miserable. “No! I never hit him. Nothing like that. We had a fight last week, and I grabbed him just like last night. I don’t know my own strength sometimes, and he really knows how to push my buttons. Those were the only two times, but I’m afraid of what might happen if things don’t change.”
Ben didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know Ryan or his history with Tim, and part of him was unwilling to ask. If Ryan caught them here things would only get worse. Jace wasn’t thrilled with Ben being here either, but at least Ben hadn’t kept it a secret. What could he do, walk away? Let his last memory of Tim be of the broken man before him?
“All right,” Ben said. “Tell me everything.”
Tim had met Ryan at a bar a year ago and they had everything in common. Both came from well-to-do families with distant parents. Ryan’s had turned their backs on him when he came out, eventually cutting him off from his college tuition. Tim had supported him, but eventually learned that Ryan never attended the expensive classes he was paying for. Ryan had little interest in anything other than partying, and Tim had indulged him, joining in and feeling like a teenager again.
“For a while things were good,” Tim said. “Well, maybe not good, but entertaining. Then the lies started. First my wallet was stolen. I didn’t care about the cash, but the credit cards were a hassle. Part of me suspected, so I didn’t cancel them right away. Sure enough, they were used at Ryan’s favorite clothing store. The brat even showed up in a new outfit the next day. It’s not like he has a job or any other source of income besides me, so it couldn’t have been more obvious.
“Then a friend of his turned out to be much more. I put an end to that, but it wasn’t pretty. I suppose it was karma for what I put you and Jace through. Every time I try to rein him in makes him act out that much more, usually by partying. Last week Ryan ended up in the ER to have his stomach pumped. All he cares about anymore is drinking and drugs.”
“Looks like you’ve been indulging a bit yourself,” Ben said.
Tim moved his hand away from his glass and nodded. “Ryan is your opposite. You always brought out the good in me, changed me for the better. With Ryan, I just don’t know. I used to see myself in him. His parents are just as cold as mine, and I saw the pain hidden behind that pretty face of his, but he has a mean streak. Ryan turns his hurt back on the world, and I don’t know what I can do to make him better. Sometimes I think he’s who I would have become if I had never met you.”
Ben listened, mentally searching for an answer to Tim’s problems. Tim had tried to do right by Ryan, but the anger Ben had seen last night still concerned him. If something didn’t change, Tim might do something he would regret. In any case, Ben didn’t like to see him suffer like this.
They soon asked for the check. Neither had touched the appetizer, and Tim had already finished the wine. Ben insisted on driving Tim home, imagining for the briefest of moments that the man next to him was a teenager with an injured ankle.
“This isn’t how I meant for it to be,” Tim grimaced. “How I wanted us to meet again, I mean. I had this dream about you being on stage. Isn’t that crazy? I had no idea you did theater, but I dreamt it anyway.”