Sabrina notices – probably because I accidentally turned all of her white shirts pink when it was my turn to do the laundry.
“I love you, but if you don't get a grip on whatever's got your panties in a twist then I will have to kill you,” she informs me firmly. “God, what are the guys at work gonna say when I show up in pink?”
People at work notice too, because I fluffed my lines up on two consecutive nights and normally I'm one hundred percent on form.
Blair also notices, and out of everyone she's the one who'll let me get away with it the least. “You're quieter than usual,” she observes. It's one of my rare days off, and instead of sleeping in and watching TV in my sloppy jammies like I should be doing, she's dragged me out to Lake George so we can hike Prospect Mountain. It's actually a lot of fun, but since I complained pretty much the entire four hour drive out here, I definitely won't be admitting that. She claimed it was because she wanted to get some photos, but though she's brought her camera, I know it's just a ruse. She just wanted to get me away so she could find out what my deal is. “It's freaking me out. Quiet Ibbie is wrong. Just wrong.”
“God, am I really that talkative that it weirds people out when I have nothing to say?” I wonder out loud. “Cringe attack.”
“So. . ?”
“Maybe I've just decided to transform into a quiet person.”
She eyes me doubtfully, then we both fall about in laughter, unable to keep straight faces. We come across a large boulder and sit down for a couple minutes of rest.
“How's the wedding planning going?” I ask to change the subject, because if you brought up an upcoming wedding to most brides then it would be a surefire way to distract them for at least, like, five hours. Unfortunately, Blair is not most women.
“Haven't even started,” she replies. “Now spill.”
I actually do want to spill and I'm not sure why I didn't the second Walt dropped me off the other night, so with a relived sigh I tell her everything. Blair is the best friend ever, because when I tell her about Alex ignoring my calls her eyes narrow angrily on my behalf, and when I tell her how nice Walt was and how he drove me out to his grandparents' house, she keeps shtum even though I know she wants to ask me a million questions, and then when I tell her about Fauna and about Aleix's reaction to seeing me, she stands up and balls her little fists and threatens to hunt him down and pulverize his nuts. I'm tempted and all, but I make the tiny spitfire sit her ass back down because I'm not finished. I tell her about Walt kissing me in his old bedroom and about the windmill and the dancing and the second kiss. And when I tell her about Walt admitting that he wants to be with me it's such a weight off my chest that I can't figure out why I didn't tell her sooner. Usually I love to gossip. Walt's got me in such a frigging tizzy!
She takes it all in, nodding her head up and down and not being at all surprised and shocked like I expected her to be. I mean, a little awe and outrage might be nice. Jeez. “So Walt's into you?”
“I guess so.”
“Totally called that one.”
“You did not.”
“Did so. When he first started texting you.” She sticks her tongue out triumphantly when I realize she's right. “So how do you feel about him?”
“I don't know. Confused, mainly.”
“Do you think you might wanna try dating him?”
“I don't know,” I repeat, getting frustrated – mostly with myself, but I'm fully prepared to take it out on her. That's how I know Blair really is my BFF, because we can give each other a hard time and still love each other after.
“You must know,” she continues, not willing to give me a break. “Deep down. Do you want to be with him, yes or no?”
“I. Don't. Know!” I protest. We're both getting annoyed now. “It's complicated.”
“No it's not. Yes or no, Ibbie? Yes or no?”
“I don't-”
“Yes or no?”
“Blair-”
“Yes or no?”
“Yes!” I yell, and then I freeze when I realize what she was doing. She was pulling an answer from me because she knew I'd never be able to come to a decision on my own. Damn it, she's a sneaky son of a gun!
Her grin is triumphant. “Ha!”
“No,” I say. “I don't mean. . . How can I want to be with him just because he was nice to me for one night? It doesn't make up for an entire year of him being awful.”
She scoffs, arching one of those perfect eyebrows at me. Girl's got some strong eyebrow game going on. “Yeah, because you were so innocent. You remember the time you put that stuff in his drink to turn his pee blue?”
I smile at the memory of him leaving the bathroom looking seriously freaked out. “Oh yeah, that was a good one. But he totally started this whole thing. I tried to be nice to him when we first met.”
“Well I think the two of you have had sexual tension the whole time. That's all it is. Sometimes people just can't express when they like each other. I remember back when I was falling for Silver I used to make fun of him all the time. Mostly just to get his attention, I think.”
“You still do that.”
She grins. “I still want his attention.”
I pink her cheek. “You're so friggin' cute.”
Slapping my hand away, she asks, “So what are you gonna do about Walt?”
“Do?” I blink. “Nothing!”
“Don't you think you should at least talk to him?”
“Um, no. He said he was going to give me a month, therefore I have a month to hide out in my apartment and do nothing.”
“Seriously, you're just gonna wait? And stew? And get all up in your head about everything when you could just confront him?”
“You waited when Silver left you for three months.”
She rolls her eyes at my sullen pettiness. “Because I was still in high school and he was still a teacher. But you and I, Ibbs, we're not high school kids anymore. We don't have to sit around waiting for life to happen to us. We can just live it.”
I stand up, throwing my hands in the air and refusing to admit that she's making sense. Mostly because I don't want to admit it. “You're so annoying! Why are you being so pushy?”
Her arms fold across her chest and she glares at me. “Because I know you like him. And I just want to see you happy. Because I love you to bits!”
“Yeah well. . .I love you to bits and pieces. AND PIECES!”
We continue to scowl at each other for almost a whole minute before we finally lose steam, both realizing that as far as arguments go, this one was pretty lame. Neither of us are good at fighting each other.
Blair is the first to cave and smile at how dumb we are. “That was fun.”
I sit back next to her. “Yeah, we should argue more often.”
She nudges me with her shoulder. “You need to talk to him.”
“I know.” I nod, because she's right. Even if it's just to get answers to the squillion gazillion questions zooming around in my brain, I really do have to talk to Walt. “So seriously, it's been over a month and you haven't even made one teeny, tiny little wedding plan yet?”
A long sigh escapes her as she shrugs. “It's just that. . .I want to be married to him more than anything, but I don't know if I can deal with the stress of a big wedding. I'm not that kind of girl, you know? If I could, I'd just drag him away to some hot beach and do it right there in our swimwear.”
That actually sounds like it would be perfect for Silver and Blair, but, “Felicia would kill you.”
“Yeah. Sometimes I feel like the wedding day stops being about the bride and groom and becomes more about everyone else.” Her face brightens. “Oh hey, maid of honor, right?”
That's my Blair. Even when asking something as huge as this she still manages to sound cool and casual. I squeal happily, throwing my arms around her shoulders and squeezing the eff out of her even though I'd totally known it was coming – because if she hadn't picked me I would have had to end her. “You know I will! I'm so excited!”