“Don’t touch her.” In a flash, Hayden stood at my side, bumping Chait away. He tilted my chin up and looked into my eyes. “You okay?”
“Not really.” My chin quivered.
Hayden wrapped his arms around me. I buried my face in his shoulder and squeezed my eyes shut a moment before pulling back.
“I’m sorry about your sister. If I’d known about her and that you didn’t remember, I would’ve found a gentler way for you to find out.” Chait glared at Rena.
“I guess I forgot she existed.” My voice trailed off. “How could I have forgotten her?”
With his free hand, Hayden reached over and wiped away the new tear with his thumb. “Well, I think this went well. Shall we do this again real soon?”
I almost let him lead me away, but instead, turned to face David. “One question. Which side did she choose?”
“Zoe picked us,” he answered.
Hayden poured me into his car and we took off. Once we got to his guesthouse, he guided me inside and coaxed me to sit, then tucked a blanket around me. “You want tea? Hot cocoa or something?”
It was almost dinner time but I couldn’t imagine eating anything. I needed something to battle the nausea though. “Cocoa would be nice.”
“I’ll be back.”
* * * *
I awoke disoriented in the dark silence of Hayden’s living room.
“You awake?” Hayden whispered.
“Yeah.” I stretched. “What time is it?”
“A little after seven.”
“I need to get home.” I moved to sit up and spotted the mug of cocoa I never had a chance to drink.
“You need to chill, that’s what you need.” Hayden stopped me with a hand on my shoulder. “I already called your mom. Sounded like she was at a bar or something. Bree’s with the babysitter.”
“How did you get her number?”
He grinned, sitting on the arm of the couch. “It’s in your phone under Mom.”
I laughed weakly, still groggy. “What did you tell her?”
“The truth. That you fell asleep on my couch and I didn’t want to wake you.”
“I’m going to sit up now.” I eyed him and he didn’t try to stop me.
“I could call her again and say that you didn’t wake up and you’re spending the night.”
“Hayden, I’m not sleeping here.”
“I don’t trust them.” His lips formed into a thin line.
“Who? Phillips and Linton? Or Chait and Rena?”
“All of them — especially Rena. I can’t shake the feeling that she’s whacked. When you leave, you’re vulnerable to her or any of them. What can I do to make you feel safe here? I have a guest room that locks.”
I closed my eyes a moment and considered it. If I stayed, lock or no lock, I’d end up in bed with Hayden. At the very least, I’d kiss him. My stomach tensed just thinking about his lips on mine.
All the more reason to avoid a situation that would make it too easy. He wouldn’t worry so much though if he stayed at my house. With Bree there and the possibility that either of my parents could come home early, little could happen.
“You can sleep on my couch. I’m sure my mom will be more than happy to have you there. Better yet, you can take my room and I’ll bunk with Bree.” I smiled. “That way, if anyone sneaks in my room, they’ll get a big surprise.”
Hayden chuckled. “Deal.”
“My mom probably won’t be home though. She’s hardly ever there at night.”
“Really?”
“Very rarely, like when she breaks up with a guy or something. She usually leaves after Bree goes to bed. She’s talked about getting a live-in babysitter, so she can come and go as she pleases.” I wasn’t sure if I should give him all the gory details. He’d given me the lowdown on his family so why not? “She’s almost never home before midnight. Sometimes, I don’t see her again until I come home from school the next day.”
“When she’s staying out all night with a boyfriend, where’s your dad?”
“With his girlfriend. It’s a marriage in name only.” I picked at my fingernail cuticles, wishing I hadn’t opened my big mouth. “I see him like once or twice a week. I see my mom more often but I think she only does that for appearances sake. You know, make dinner, pay the babysitter, pretend like we’re a family. But I mostly take care of Bree, like get her ready in the morning and take her to school. The babysitter does the rest. My mom barely knows Bree.”
“So we’re both basically orphans,” Hayden said, holding out his hand. “C’mon. I bet you want to get home to Bree before she goes to bed.”
Damn. I hated it when Hayden went all considerate on me. Why did he have to be such a player? I put my hand in his and let him help me off the couch. “Yeah. I need to get home.”
He nodded. “Give me one minute. I have to grab my bag.”
As soon as he left, it hit me. I’d fallen asleep in Hayden’s lair from exhaustion after remembering Zoe, my beautiful, sweet older sister. I recalled worshipping her and waiting each day for her to get home from school and how she read me to sleep.
I sank back onto the couch and covered my face with my hands, my sobs coming quick and hard.
“Hey.” Hayden sat beside me, laid my head on his shoulder and stroked my hair. “I’m so sorry.”
“There’s no trace of her anywhere in the house. No pictures, nothing. It’s as if she never existed.” I snuggled into him, pressing against his chest.
“No wonder you forgot. It was years ago and you were young, right?”
“About Bree’s age, I think.” I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. “We should go.”
“We’re not in a hurry. Hang on.”
“No, I’m okay now.” I sniffed.
He ran a fingertip along my cheek. “We’ll find out who killed her.”
I nodded but all I could think about was kissing him. I’d feel so much better after a hot make-out session with my lust-buddy. He rose, pulling me up by my elbows. We stood toe-to-toe, his hands at my waist. I lifted my chin and waited for him to lay a lip-lock on me.
“C’mon.” He turned and slung a duffle bag over his shoulder, then took my hand on the way to the door.
How frightening I must have looked — red-rimmed eyes, splotchy skin. My hair was probably a mess from sleeping too. If I were him, I probably wouldn’t want to kiss me either.
Chapter Eighteen
Hayden
I should have kissed her. No, it’s good that I didn’t. In her right mind, Tessa wouldn’t have looked at me that way — like she wanted me to drag her off to my bedroom. Her eyes were still moist, her face still flushed from crying. Jumping her would’ve been taking advantage, kind of like if she were drunk.
Shaking it off, I concentrated on driving my mom’s SUV. As much as I wanted Tessa, seducing her wouldn’t work in the long run. Tessa wasn’t the kind of girl who did that sort of thing unless she wanted to and believed it was for keeps. Whatever happened between us needed to be her idea. Spending the night at her house was a much better plan. Her territory. She would be in control. If anything happened, it would be on her head.
But we’d probably never roll around in the sheets together. Make out maybe. I was totally into kissing her — as much as possible. Clothes would stay on though. If I needed sex, my cell phone was loaded with numbers of willing girls. Except that I couldn’t call another girl when all I wanted to do was see Tessa. I had to believe that those urges would pass. Soon.
I calmed, reaffirming my decision to take things slow and snuck a peek at her facing straight ahead in the passenger’s side. She looked good. Hot, actually. “Are you feeling better?”
“A little bit.” She sniffed. “I’m hoping my mom’s not there. I don’t trust myself to be around her.”
“Mad at her?” I asked.
“Mad is an understatement. What’s wrong with those people? How can you have a daughter and pretend she never existed and allow me to do the same? It’s so wrong. If my mom is there tonight, I won’t be able to stop myself from laying into her.” Her voice rose in pitch and she choked back a sob.