“Thank you for coming,” David said.
“You all are family. Of course I came.”
“It means a lot to Drew that you are here.”
I let out a long breath. “This doesn’t change anything. I can’t see him after this is over. It hurts too much,” I said and hung my head.
“Look, Alex. This is my fault,” David said, turning to face me in his chair. “I cornered him and he panicked. He didn’t mean it. He was just…”
“Just what, David?” I could feel myself getting angry again. “Himself? He used me.”
My voice was getting louder. My lips flattened into a thin line as I tried to rein in my anger.
“This is between the two of you and I can’t speak for him. All I can do is tell you what I have observed.” David took a breath. “You belong together. We’ve all known it for years. We were just waiting for you two to figure it out for yourselves. He has been a wreck, Alex. Before you throw away everything you two have, please just talk to him.”
Tears were falling from my eyes. I knew he was right and, in that moment, I hated him for it.
Drew came around the corner and stepped up to David. “Hey, they’re moving him into a private room. Once they move him, we’ll all be able to go back and sit with him.” Drew put his hand on David’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go home, get some rest, and check on Millie? Red and I will stay.”
David looked at me raising his eyebrows as if to ask if I was okay with that. I nodded in response. We swore we would call if anything happened and, with a promise to be back in a few hours, David headed home.
We waited quietly until the nurse came out to give us Papa Jack’s room number.
When we got to the room, Papa Jack was asleep. Wires were sticking out from his chest and a tube was stuck under his nose. He looked so pale and small. I didn’t think he could ever look small.
I took a seat next to the bed and took his hand as Drew took a seat on his other side. We sat in silence for a long time, just waiting for Papa jack to open his eyes so we knew he would be okay.
It was early morning and sitting up in the waiting room all night was taking its toll on me. I yawned and stretched my back, trying to trigger a second wind.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Drew said, finally breaking the silence.
“Of course I am.” I reached to take Papa Jack’s hand. “He’s family.”
“I know, but it means a lot.” Drew reached across the bed to take my hand, but I pulled away quickly.
“Drew, don’t.” He looked so hurt, but I steeled myself. He may have been hurt I pulled away, but I had been devastated for weeks.
“Red, please.”
“We aren’t doing this, Drew. I’m here because Jack is hurt. This doesn’t mean I forgive you or want to talk about it.” I got to my feet. “If you can’t handle that, then I’ll leave.” I headed for the door.
“Red! Please, don’t walk out on me.”
I whirled on him. “Don’t walk out on you. Why? Why do you care? I was only a matter of convenience to you anyway.”
“That’s not fair, Red.”
“What’s not fair is you making me believe that you felt something for me. What’s not fair is telling me all that bullshit about me being the one you wanted when I was just another notch on your headboard. What do you want me to say, Drew? Thanks for the sex; I’ll see you at trivia.” I was so far past angry. My entire body was tense, the muscles straining so hard it hurt. “You knew how I felt about you. I was prepared to be rejected. I expected it, but I was stupid enough to believe that you actually cared about me as a friend. I had you pegged from day one, but I convinced myself that deep down you were a good guy. I was wrong. You are still the same womanizing asshole I met at that stupid party.”
“Are you done?” he asked, his jaw tense.
“Absolutely,” I said, reaching for the door knob.
Drew took a hold of my elbow and turned me to face him. “First of all, you’re right. I was that guy when we met, but I need to make one thing absolutely clear. Nothing that I have ever told you was a lie. I do feel something for you. I’ve had feelings for you for a long time and yes, I have not had a single serious relationship since we met because no one comes fucking close to you.” He dropped my elbow and took a breath. “Alex, that night you told me you loved me, I couldn’t believe it. Then, before I could even say a word, you started in on your plan to get past it, to get over your feelings for me and how you didn’t want to love me. I have tried so many times over the years to tell you how I feel and you have either stopped me or we have been interrupted. So, eventually, I just stopped trying. I figured when you were ready you would come to me, but even when you did, I still didn’t get the chance to tell you what I want.”
I crossed my arms across my chest. “Fine. What do you want, Drew?”
He didn’t hesitate. “I want you! I want to be with you. I want to wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep with you every night. I want to fight with you and have makeup sex on the kitchen floor. I want a life. I want it all and I want it with you!”
“That’s such bullshit! You got caught and now you’re trying to cover your ass. If you wanted me, then why not just tell David the truth?” I was not going to let myself fall into another trap.
“Because David already knows the truth! Everybody knows. Everybody, except you.”
“Everybody knows what?”
“That I’m in love with you! That I’ve been in love with you for six fucking years!”
“What?” I said, barely choking out the word.
He took a step toward me, saying the words slowly. “I am in love with you. I have fallen a little bit more in love with you every single day since you dumped that drink over my head.” Drew stepped closer, bringing his hand to my cheek. “You are stubborn, pig headed, and let’s face it, a little oblivious at times, but you are also smart, funny, and the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, inside and out. I love you, Red.”
I stared at him. I couldn’t believe what he just said. He loves me? Six years?
“W…Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because back then you needed me. You needed to have someone you could count on without the fear of more loss. I was doing what I thought was best for you.”
I looked down as the tears filled my eyes. “No, you’re lying.”
“Alex, look at me.” I did as he said, slowly dragging my eyes to meet his. I was surprised to see the love and sincerity shining out from them. “Things with us have always been effortless. You have been the best part of my life for so long that after a while, the thought of complicating that scared the shit out of me. That’s part of why I waited so long and that’s why I wanted to keep what was happening with us under wraps for a while, to see if we could have a real shot at making this work without all the pressure from everyone else getting in the way.”
“That’s stupid.”
“I didn’t say it was the smartest plan.”
I laughed, my body starting to relax. I wanted to believe him. I wanted this to be real so badly, but I was terrified. My head was spinning. I shook my head and stepped away from him. This was all so overwhelming.
“You’re it for me, Alex,” he said, his voice desperate and pleading.
I didn’t know what to do or say. This whole thing was crazy. I didn’t know what to think. He really hurt me. He handled the David situation all wrong, but I had been too stubborn and wrapped up in my own heartbreak to give him a chance to make it right. He loved me and really, that was all I needed to hear.
I closed the distance between us and kissed him, pouring everything I felt over the past few weeks—the doubt, the fear, all of the hurt—into the kiss. He responded, deepening the kiss, pulling me tight against his body. Everything we had been through didn’t matter anymore. I loved him and he loved me. Odds were, our future would be full of obstacles, but we could have a future. We could do it together.