“Oh, do struggle, my dears! The tighter you struggle, the tighter it holds.” She sat perched on the side of the stage, the smile on her lips impossible to erase.
“It is true, my old powers are gone,” she admitted. “But you’ve heard it said that there’s a little witchcraft in all us girls. I wouldn’t have believed it myself until I became one, but once I realized there was real power there after becoming one myself, I knew instantly how to use it. Mahalo McMahon, as it turned out, was better than that. She was high priestess of the Neo-Primitive Hawaiian Church or some such thing. I also realized that I had it only so long as I remained female. That was no hardship; I decided I liked being a girl! I liked particularly the way men looked at me, the way they’d get all silly and fall all over themselves just because I batted an eye at them or swiv-eled a hip. It was a whole new level of power and control. And because I again had some power and the knowledge of how to use it, I could walk without fear, which is what keeps most women down. As a man, I’d never had much use for sex, except as a tool in my work, as powerful as it was. I began to discover how much I’d missed over all that time, how much fun it was to be a real person. The Rules decided that I was a witch, which was fine, but, thank the fates, I didn’t have to be the Dark Baron or the Dark Anything anymore.”
“I’m glad to see you found your true calling,” Joe responded sourly. “The Wicked Bimbo of the North.”
She laughed. “I owe that to you and Ruddygore and the others, too,” she said. “All those years, all that enormous effort, all for the noblest of ends. Then I was exiled to Earth, and saw so many political and economic systems, all launched for noble purposes, and I saw homelessness, starvation, misery, and despair. Some worked better than others, but not a one of them really worked any better than our own systems here. In disgust, the demoted demons and I decided to wipe it all away, but you stopped that, and I’m so very happy you did, my darlings. For the first time, I’m totally honest, even with myself, and totally free of those hang-ups. Now, for the first time, I can look myself in the mirror and know that I’m doing what I do and choosing what I choose for no other reason than because being bad is so much more fun!”
She frowned, staring suddenly at Mia, who was staring back, furious at Boquillas. “Why darling, that suits you just wonderfully, looking like that! One of my little ideas that’s turned out so nicely. I never had much liking for women when I was a man and, now that I am a woman, I find I like other women even less than before. What a wonderful comeback, darling, and I had nothing to do with it! Ruddygore himself went to great lengths to insure you would sink to slavery.”
“I have always been a slave, you witch! You should know! You killed Tiana, my mistress!” Mia shouted.
For a moment Boquillas looked genuinely puzzled and confused, but then she stared at Mia, then at Joe, reading the small spells Ruddygore had woven, and broke into laughter. “Oh, my! That is amusing!” she managed after a bit. “My dears, I didn’t kill Tiana, let alone import some royal slave bimbo. How could I? You had the Lamp, which was the only way across at the time. Ruddygore wanted to insure that you would be lean, mean, and totally loyal and unwavering to the mission.
“You are Tiana, my sweet. You always have been.”
“No!” Mia wailed. “It is not true!”
But Joe almost instantly realized that it was true. So many more things made sense if it was, and there was no getting around the transportation problem that Boquillas so neatly pointed out. There was no way that a Mia could have fooled him so thoroughly and for so long those first few months back. And, before they returned, Ti could read quite well, even English. Ruddygore again, playing with and manipulating everyone as pawns in his grand game. The Rules had not reduced her to this; Ruddygore had created the conditions so that upon landing this result was inevitable.
It became suddenly obvious, the whole plot. Her intuitive skills with weapons, for example. And what was it to Ruddy-gore, who could mess with both their memories and perceptions, to give her the dance, maybe taken from some strippers he’d seen in San Francisco, or some of the basic skills, like mending and tailoring? Why a slave? Because, otherwise, she could not be pared down to the tough essentials to get her to this point, and certainly not to aid in the destruction of the way back.
And all that so that they could stand there, captive of their worst enemy?
The “Mia” personality, so nicely adjusted by Ruddygore’s spells, rebelled against the truth, but Boquillas was ready for that. “Let me simply disentangle those rather simple little spells that blinded you both. Won’t take a second, and it clears away all that messy stuff.”
Tiana stopped protesting and suddenly gasped. “Then it is true,” she said simply.
Boquillas smiled. “Of course it is. And you will be very, very helpful to me. You see, as our palace slave, in reality the role you were handed by Ruddygore’s fiction, compelled to obedience, you will be my closest advisor and critic. With you advising me, dressing me, prompting me, there will be no question in anyone’s mind that I am the one and only original Tiana. And after I am in control and beyond threat, you will continue to be there to serve me and do whatever I command, living life at its lowest while watching me live yours.”
“So you plan to be the one in Tiana’s body,” Joe said.
She nodded. “Of course. I can’t be you, since I’d lose what powers I have regained, and, as I said, I rather like being this way. In fact, I shall be sad to leave this body for the more, ah, statuesque proportions of Tiana, but we can’t have everything, can we?”
“I see. And what about me?”
She gave that wicked Boquillas smile once more. “But that’s so simple, Joey baby! It’s the most delicious part of all of it! We’ll just slip little old you back into that marvelous body you had, whose statues don’t do you justice, and you’ll be right there, unimpeachable, convincing, truly returned, reinforcing my own image, with your great sword living as absolute proof that it’s you. You’ll leave the decisions to me, of course, but you mostly did that when you were reigning with her anyway.”
“You bastard! What makes you think I’ll do anything of the sort?”
“Oh, Joey baby! As a man who was just taken in by the simplest little old spell in Creation, you really don’t think you have a choice, do you? If old Ruddypuss can convince you that this girl is not Tiana, how much simpler will it be to build a scenario in your mind that I am? And you’ll be much too lovesick to do more than forgive and accept whatever I decide to do. Why, you have to create love potions and charms just to get into Witchcraft 101. Besides, if all else fails, there’s always your son to hold you, isn’t there? There are all sorts of possibilities with the boy!”
He knew at once that Boquillas was right and that they’d all been had, even Ruddygore. Boquillas had understood that in the critical first week they returned unannounced, they’d be under a microscope by politicians, courtiers, and top-ranked sorcerers. Sugasto couldn’t exactly be around in the nearest closet to bail her out; with her powers still limited, she would at that point be as vulnerable as he would be. After consolidating power, though, and gathering it in, she’d be able progressively to eliminate anyone who might challenge, and Sugasto would take most of Husaquahr without even firing a shot.