I wasn’t sure of this plan. Tami wasn’t the girlie-girl type. My co-conspirators outvoted me. They had fresh-cut flowers in vases. Rose petals led to the bedroom and were all over the bed. All I could see was me having to clean it all up. They promised me her knees would go weak with happiness at my romantic gesture. I swear Mom and Angie were more into this than I was. Mom was convinced I would win Tami back and was already planning the wedding and naming grandbabies.
I felt guilty when I just told Tami to stop by because I had some of her things in my apartment. I invited her to dinner. It was true I had some of her clothes, but I was thinking about how I would react if I walked into this low-budget romantic comedy of an evening. I would probably run. I would need to make sure I was between her and the door and start talking fast before she bolted.
I didn’t tell my mom or Angie what I’d planned to seal the deaclass="underline" I had gone out and bought Tami a promise ring.
ANGIE SENT ME A TEXT when Tami arrived. I was to light the candles and then come down and get her. What a pain in the ass! They must have put a hundred candles all over my apartment. Was I smart enough to have a lighter? No, I had a pack of matches. I lit the first fifteen candles, and then I was out of matches. I had also burned my fingers all to heck. I was puzzling out what to do when I had a stroke of genius. Spaghetti! I got into my cabinet and pulled out a box. The dried noodles made a perfect candle lighters.
I finally got the last one lit when I started to get light-headed. My apartment smelled like I had dumped bottles of perfume all over. I wondered who the genius was who thought scented candles were a good idea. It might have been okay if they had picked just one scent. The smell was almost overpowering.
Angie sent me another text wanting to know what was taking so long.
I took two stairs at a time and then rushed into the kitchen where Tami was sitting at the table talking to Mom and Angie. I skidded to a stop and gave Tami my best smile. Crud! I should have just told them to send her up because she was suddenly suspicious.
“What are you up to, Mister?” she asked me.
I gave her my best ‘Who, Me?’ look. It didn’t help when Angie and my mom burst out laughing at me. I gave them both the evil eye. I wondered if they set me up just to see how much they could make me squirm.
“Ignore them. Let’s get your stuff,” I said, walking towards the door.
“Why don’t you just bring it down?” Tami asked reasonably.
Yeah, why hadn’t I just brought it down? I really was a ‘stupid boy.’ I walked back thinking what I should say. Mom and Angie gave me a curious look, waiting for my brilliant response.
“Uhm ...” I said.
Angie had to look away, and Mom bit her bottom lip. Then Tami wrinkled her nose.
“How come you stink?”
“Well ... you see ... it’s like this ... ah ... Dang it, Tami! Just come with me,” I said and grabbed her hand, intending to drag her upstairs if I had to.
She snatched her hand out of mine.
“Not until you tell me what’s going on,” she insisted.
I looked hard at Mom and Angie, and they wouldn’t look at me. I looked at Tami and she had a gleam in her eyes which told me all I needed to know. I went all caveman and threw her over my shoulder. She giggled and made me put her down. She wanted to see what I was up to, so she went with me.
I opened the door and the stench hit us as we started up the stairs. When she got to the top, she turned and smiled at me.
“This is beautiful, but could we blow them out before we die from the fumes or you catch the place on fire?” Tami asked.
I just nodded and we went through the apartment putting out candles. I opened the windows to air the place out. I should’ve quit while I was ahead. When we were done, I took her back into the living room and went down on one knee.
“I love you, Tami Glade. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want the rest of my life to start right now,” I said, and pulled out the promise ring.
Tami looked at me, and at the ring. I could tell her first reaction was to laugh, but she thought better of it. She knew me. She knew I wouldn’t have made this grand gesture if I didn’t love her. She bent down and took my face between her hands so she had my full attention. I knew I was losing her, so I pushed ahead.
“I’m sick and tired of us ignoring what we both know. We love each other. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want anybody else. I want to be with you. If that means I go to a college where there’s no football, then so be it. I want us to work. I’m willing to put you first if that’s what it takes.”
Tami reached out and caressed my face.
“You’re so full of shit,” Tami said.
I pushed the ring at her as if it had magical qualities.
“Will you promise to marry me, Tami? Maker of my dreams, mother of our future children ...”
“You have anything more?” she asked.
“No, I think I’m out.”
She bit her lower lip. I’d given it my best shot. She was too classy to rub it in my face.
“Are you as turned-on as I am?” she asked.
I liked how she thought. Maybe that was why she was my best friend.
I’M NOT SURE THAT TAMI and I ‘rocked each other’s world.’ Her leaving was hanging over our encounter. It wasn’t the distance that worried me, it was the decision to just be friends. She always added the ‘for now’ to that statement. I couldn’t.
“David, you have to stop. I’m not strong enough to keep saying ‘no’ to you,” Tami said.
“I know. I had to try one last time.”
“I understand, but it’s too hard to tell you ‘no.’ We both know this is for the best.”
I really didn’t know if that was true. Tami had come back into my life like a storm. She had pushed to be with me almost 24/7 for most of the summer so we could rebuild our friendship. I had tried hard to keep it as just friends, but when we had sex, it changed things for me. I was reminded of our commitment over the years. Someday ... it was always someday. Why couldn’t it be today?
Tami could see I was faltering.
“No! You stop right now! I can’t handle your puppy-dog eyes or your sad looks. Don’t you dare do this to me,” she said with some heat.
I looked away. Tami let out a sigh and got out of bed. I heard the back door slam when she left. The only thing that gave me any hope at all was she had taken the promise ring.
Someday ...
Saturday August 22
TAMI:
I knew I’d been unfair to David, and I hoped he knew I still loved him. He had me doubting myself so much I had kept my distance. To his credit, he left me alone.
Had I finally ruined it for us?
Was I being a selfish bitch?
I had to believe I was doing this for the right reasons. My ultimate goal was to marry my soul mate. I just had to be sure, and the only way I was going to be sure was if I lived my life. I kept coming back to we were too young. We were still in high school and David was pushing for a forever commitment. It killed me to do it to him again, but I was always the one who had to make the hard decisions. I just hoped I hadn’t ruined our someday.
DAVID:
Tami was heading back to Wesleyan today. We hadn’t talked since last Saturday when I made an ass out of myself. She had promised to stop by before she left. I was waiting in the driveway when she pulled up. She got out of her car, and I pulled Tami into my arms. She rested her head on my shoulder.
“I love you,” I said. “I ... I didn’t say it to hear it back.”
I pulled back, and our foreheads bumped into each other.
“Thank you for helping me get my head out of my ass,” I said.
“That’s what I do.”
I pulled her back into a hug. I didn’t want to let her go. She finally pulled away from me and went back to her car. I had to turn away. I couldn’t watch her leave yet again. I hadn’t realized I was crying until I went into the house and Mom wiped the tears from my face.