“Reach out!” said JC, waving his arms around in what he hoped was a meaningful way. “Make contact with. . Something! Slap it around the head in your own special psychic way and get it to talk to you. Say nasty things about its mother. .”
Happy shrugged briefly and concentrated. Melody finally realised what he was doing and shut down her tech so it wouldn’t interfere with his efforts. Brook looked like he wanted to duck behind the bar-counter again, but JC glared at him till he held his ground. Kim stared at Happy, fascinated, and went back to hover beside JC.
“Do you have any idea why the storm invaded the bar?” JC said quietly.
“It wasn’t just a storm,” said Kim. “I could feel anger in it. .”
“All right!” Happy said loudly. He was frowning so hard it must have been painful, but he was also grinning in a really unpleasant way. “Everybody please shut the hell up and pay attention! Look around you! We are very definitely not alone here!”
Everyone looked up and down the wrecked and waterlogged main bar, but there was no-one else present that they could see. Everything seemed perfectly still and quiet. And then all the bar taps turned themselves on at once, and a dozen frothing liquids fell to the floor. Beers and ciders and lagers, all spouting out of the opened taps. Brook cried out and ran up and down the bar, closing the taps one after another. But the moment he moved on, the closed taps opened themselves up again. Brook swore loudly, as the floor behind the counter flooded. And then all the bottles on display at the back of the bar exploded, one after another; blasting vicious glass shrapnel through the air. Brook came running out from behind the counter, his arms up to protect his head.
JC grabbed him and pulled him down, away from the flying glass. Happy was already crouching, both arms wrapped around his head. Melody stayed where she was, peering out from behind her lap-top. And Kim stood still, letting things pass through her with complete indifference. Slowly, things began to quiet down. There were no bottles left to explode, and the taps began to run dry, one after another.
And then, the overturned tables and chairs began to rock back and forth, as though gathering strength and determination. They rolled slowly along the floor towards the besieged people, gathering speed. There was a blind, brutal intent behind their advance, as they headed straight for JC and Happy, Brook and Melody. Kim strode forward to block their way, one hand held out imperiously. The tables and chairs rolled straight through her.
Melody straightened up, her machine-pistol at the ready. She opened fire on the nearest table, and blew it apart with a stream of bullets. Broken wood and jagged splinters flew on the air. But it only took Melody a moment to realise there was far too much furniture, and nowhere near enough bullets. She couldn’t hope to stop them all. The rolling tables and chairs kept coming, faster and faster. Dangerously fast, with so much weight behind them.
The overhead lights started to flicker off and on, so that the whole bar went from light to dark, light to dark.
“They’re destroying my pub!” screamed Brook. “Do Something!”
“This is us, doing something,” said JC.
“Hell with the pub!” said Happy. “I refuse to die by furniture! Do Something, JC!”
The floor-boards suddenly rose and fell, rippling like a slow wave on a wooden sea. Great ragged cracks shot across the walls and ceiling, creaking and groaning loudly, as though the bar was trying to tear itself apart. Tables and chairs rattled and somersaulted across the uneven floor, heading straight for JC and Brook, Melody and Happy, picking up speed all the time. JC stepped forward to meet them, and produced a small round object from his jacket pocket. It shone brightly, the size of a cricket ball. JC held it out before him.
“See this?” he said loudly. “This is an exorcism grenade. Ready to blast holy sanctified light all over the vicinity! So stop this nonsense right now. Or else.”
A floor-board lurched suddenly up under his feet, throwing him off-balance for a moment. JC pulled the pin from the grenade and tossed it lightly into the midst of the on-coming furniture. He turned to Kim.
“Get out of here! Right now! It won’t be safe for you in here when this thing goes off!”
Kim nodded quickly and dived across the room, running straight through the outer wall, and on into the car park outside. JC turned back to the advancing chairs and tables and stood his ground, arms folded defiantly across his chest. There was a silent blast of overpowering, unbearable light, as the exorcism grenade exploded, filling the bar from one end to the other. And then it was gone. There was a pause, and the electric lights came back on, bright and calm and steady. The tables and chairs rolled to a halt and lay side by side on the quiet floor; rocking slowly back to inactivity again. Everything in the main bar was still and quiet. There was an overwhelming feeling of calm and peace. JC smiled cheerfully about him.
“Let this be a warning to one and all,” he said loudly. “I am not always bluffing.”
Happy looked at him. “An exorcism grenade? I thought those things were banned from field use, pending further testing?”
“I just tested it,” said JC.
“One of these days they’re going to catch you filling your pockets with whatever you fancy from the Carnacki warehouse,” said Melody.
“What the Boss doesn’t know about won’t give her sleepless nights,” said JC.
Kim stuck her head back through the wall and looked about her. “Is that it? Is it safe for me to come back in now?”
“Please don’t do that,” said Happy. “It’s like looking at a serial killer’s mounted trophy.”
“Get back in here, Kim,” said JC.
The ghost girl walked calmly through the wall, ignoring Happy with magnificent disdain, and considered the vanquished furniture, lying scattered the length of the main bar. She nodded, clearly expecting nothing less, and smiled brilliantly at JC. The two of them gave each other their almost but not quite high five.
“Well,” Kim said pleasantly, “you wanted to provoke a response, darling. I’d say you succeeded.”
“Look what you’ve done to my bar!” said Brook, almost hysterically.
“Not a bad reaction, as reactions go,” said JC, ignoring the barman. “Surprisingly, however; nothing at all to do with ghosts. . Right then; if the ghost won’t come to the bar. . Adrian! Adrian; where are you. . Ah, there you are! Stop sulking and pay attention. I think you need to show me the room where your dead girl-friend is still waiting around.”
Brook moved forward, reluctantly. “You think Lydia’s got something to do with all this?”
“I don’t know,” said JC. “But she’s what brought you back, and it was only after you returned that all this started up again. So I think I need to take a look, maybe have a nice little chat with the young lady. See what she has to say for herself. Happy, Melody, you stay here in the bar. Keep an eye on things. And slap them down hard if they look like they’re getting out of hand again. I hereby authorise you to use excessive force because that’s the only kind you two understand anyway.”
“I’m not cleaning this up!” Melody said immediately, glaring at the mess around her. “I do not do cleaning up!”
“It’s true,” said Happy. “She doesn’t. But since I really don’t want to go back upstairs yet, I’m prepared to do a little light tidying, as long as it doesn’t involve actual effort.”
“I want to go see the ghost,” said Melody, sticking out her lower lip. “Why can’t I go and see the ghost? I’ll be quiet.”
“Too many people at once might frighten her,” JC said firmly. “Besides, do you really want to leave Happy down here, on his own?”
Melody shot a quick look at Happy and said nothing. JC turned to Kim.
“Be a dear, Kim, and go take a proper look outside. Several quick circuits of the pub, then go flit around the fields. See if you can track down this mysterious local power source. But don’t go too far, or get too close to anything unnatural. I’m becoming increasingly convinced that with this much raw power around, there are dangers here for the dead as well as the living.”