Bramblestar dipped his head to the other leaders. “I’ll see you all at dawn.” He turned and padded away without looking at Squirrelflight. She stared after him. Was he ashamed? Or was he angry with her? Surprise jabbed at her belly. Does he even still care what I think of him?
“You’d better hurry.” Mistystar eyed her pointedly. “It looks like he’s not going to wait for you.
Heat burned beneath Squirrelflight’s pelt. “I can find my own way home,” she snapped. As she turned away, Harestar sniffed.
“It’s good to see Bramblestar taking charge of his Clan at last,” the WindClan leader murmured.
Squirrelflight jerked her muzzle toward him. “In ThunderClan, we’re allowed to have our own opinions,” she snarled, lashing her tail as she walked away.
She didn’t try to catch up with Bramblestar, but crossed the tree-bridge and trailed him along the shore. He didn’t wait for her, and she could see by the set of his shoulders, his head hanging low, that he wanted to be left alone. In ThunderClan, we’re allowed to have our own opinions. Was that true anymore? He’d been angry ever since she’d suggested SkyClan move to new territory at the leaders’ meeting. Why? ThunderClan used to be a Clan where everyone’s ideas were given a hearing. Had her longing for more kits put him on edge? Clearly she’d been pressuring him, without knowing it, into doing something he didn’t want to do. Her heart ached. They used to want the same things. Now they seemed to think and feel differently about everything.
When she padded into camp, Bramblestar was already organizing the patrol that would go with him in the morning to the Sisters’ camp. In moonlight pooling at the center of the clearing, he looked around at the warriors crowding excitedly in front of him.
“Thornclaw, you’ll come with me,” Bramblestar told the dark warrior.
“Can I come?” Blossomfall pushed her way to the front.
“Me too.” Mousewhisker whisked his tail.
Twigbranch hung back with Finleap and glanced hopefully at Squirrelflight as she passed, as if hoping she would keep the other cats from forcing the Sisters out.
Squirrelflight looked away. There was nothing she could do to stop this. She slunk into the shadow of the Highledge, huddling away from the rest of her Clan. She didn’t want to hear their eager voices. How could so many of her Clanmates approve of this plan? Would they be acting like this if she were leader? She hunched tighter, crouching against the earth. What was the point in wondering? She’d never be leader, just like she’d never go along with this fox-hearted plan.
The shadows deepened as evening gave way to night. Squirrelflight fluffed her fur against the chill.
“What about you?”
Bramblestar’s question took her by surprise.
She looked up. He stood over her, his gaze dark. Behind him the clearing was empty. “What do you mean?” She sat up.
“Can I count on your support tomorrow?” There was hostility in his mew. “You are my deputy, after all.”
“And your mate.” Her pelt pricked uneasily. What did he expect her to say? “But that doesn’t mean I have to support you in everything. I can’t support you when I don’t agree with you.”
“You’re my deputy. I expect you to support me no matter what,” he snapped. “How can the Clan trust my decisions when you constantly challenge me?”
“You’re their leader. They’ll support you,” she mewed. “No matter how wrong you are.”
Bramblestar bristled. “So you doubt your Clan too?”
“That’s not what I said.”
“It’s what you meant.”
“You haven’t understood what I’ve meant for a moon!” Squirrelflight flattened her ears. “If you did, we wouldn’t be arguing now, and you wouldn’t be leading a battle patrol against an expectant queen!”
“Is that all that matters to you?” Bramblestar’s eyes blazed with frustration. “Some rogue and her kits? There’s more to life than kits!”
“And there’s more to life than fighting!”
“Of course there is!” Bramblestar held her gaze. “Do you think I don’t know that?”
“You’re acting as if borders and battles are the only thing you care about,” Squirrelflight spat.
“And you’re acting like the Sisters are the only cats you care about!” Hurt edged his mew.
“You think I don’t care about ThunderClan?” Thorns seemed to pierce Squirrelflight’s heart. “Of course I care! I care about them, and I care about you! More than anything! But you don’t seem to respect me anymore—not as your mate, not as your deputy—and I don’t know why.”
“Of course I respect you.” Bramblestar’s mew softened. “But you don’t seem to agree with anything I say or do. I have a Clan to lead. How can I lead them when the cat I care most about thinks I’m doing everything wrong?”
Squirrelflight gazed at him through the darkness. “Do you really believe you’re doing the right thing by attacking the Sisters?”
“I’m not attacking them! I’m just making sure they leave.”
“But you must know there’ll be a battle if you show up.”
Bramblestar’s eyes flashed. “I don’t know anything of the kind, and I’m not responsible for how Moonlight might react. I know that you’re worried, but I’m not going there to fight. I don’t want the Sisters to be hurt. I will do everything in my power to make sure we move her without bloodshed.” He looked suddenly helpless. “I promise I’m only trying to do what’s best, Squirrelflight. I can’t let the Clans fight among themselves. StarClan has told us there must be peace. This is the only way we can ensure that peace.”
Pity swelled in Squirrelflight’s chest. She suddenly saw how torn he must feel. SkyClan’s arrival beside the lake had sent shock waves through the Clans that they were still struggling to cope with. She understood why Bramblestar wanted to protect the Clans’ fragile harmony. But if everyone could just take a breath and wait, she felt sure that a battle with Moonlight and the Sisters could be avoided. “Don’t you see that I can’t agree with you?” she murmured. “The Clans are threatening unborn kits because they can’t wait one moon for extra land. It’s greedy and heartless.”
“But more land for each Clan will mean a lasting peace.” Bramblestar stared at her desperately. “Don’t you see that?”
“Is peace in the Clans so important?” There hadn’t been peace among the Clans while she was growing up, and the sky hadn’t fallen in.
“I have to obey the wishes of StarClan.” His eyes glimmered with doubt. “I’m a Clan leader. StarClan trusted me enough to give me nine lives. I can’t betray them.”
Squirrelflight’s heart ached. Bramblestar sounded wretched. He needed her. She lowered her mew to a whisper. “Even if I don’t agree with what you’re doing, I love you.”
“You do?” Hope glimmered in his eyes.
“Of course I do.”
Pelt smoothing, Bramblestar leaned forward and pressed his muzzle to her cheek. “I love you too.”
Peace washed Squirrelflight’s pelt for the first time in a moon. She felt the warmth of Bramblestar’s check and breathed in his scent. He smelled of the forest and the night, dew catching in his fur. “I wish you weren’t taking a patrol to the Sisters’ camp. I wish this could be settled another way. But if this is what you feel you must do, my loyalty will lie with you and with ThunderClan.”
He leaned against her, a soft purr trembling in his throat. “Thank you.”
“Come on.” She began to lead him toward the rock tumble. “Let’s get some sleep. We’ve got a long journey to make in the morning.”
That night, Squirrelflight dreamed a terrible dream. Battle raged around her. Cats shrieked on every side, writhing as they fought. As she strained to see through blinding sunshine, paws slammed into her shoulder. She hit the ground with a thump and glanced desperately around, scanning the confusion for a face she recognized. Fear-scents bathed her muzzle. Who were these cats? Her paws felt as heavy as stone, the earth dragging at her pelt like water.