"No! I have had enough!" She backed away, holding up her hands. "I can't stand this anymore. I do not need your protection. I love you, and I appreciate what you did for Cindy, but I do not need you to save me! If you keep insisting on this, you're going to drive me crazy, too!"
Her words reverberated in the sudden silence. He saw from her face that she regretted them the instant they left her mouth. "Oh, God, Connor. I'm sorry. I didn't mean that you… I don't think you're—"
"Crazy," he said heavily. "Too late. You said it. I heard it. You can't take it back. If that's really what you think of me, then… then there's nothing more to say."
Tears slid down her face. She covered her mouth with her hands. Her shoulders shook. "Oh, God. This is awful."
"Yeah," he agreed. He grabbed his coat and tried to move towards the door. His feet were made of lead. "Uh, Erin."
"What?" Her voice was a wary thread of sound.
"If you ever have cared about me at all, do me one favor. Please."
She nodded.
"Take someone you trust with you when you go to Mueller's house. Don't go there alone. Please."
"Connor, please. I—"
"I know that you won't let me go with you, but take someone. Do this one thing for me, and that's it. That's all I'll ever ask of you."
She opened her mouth to argue, and closed it. She nodded.
"Swear it," he said. "On something important."
"I swear it on my honor," she said quietly.
He knew that was his cue, but he was still rooted to the floor.
She picked up her phone and dialed. "Hello, Tonia? It's Erin… yeah, I'm fine. It's been a very strange time… can't talk right now, though… no, just tired. Look, I have a favor to ask. Tomorrow's your day off, right? I was wondering if you would go along with me on a job tomorrow afternoon. To Mueller's… it's a long story. I promised Connor I wouldn't go alone… yes, I know, but I promised… Really? Oh, great. It shouldn't take long. I'll buy you dinner after, if you're free… See you tomorrow afternoon. You're an angel, Ton. Thanks. 'Bye, then."
She lay the phone down. "Done," she said. "As promised."
The silence after her words had a horrible, echoing finality to it.
She'd cut him loose. There was nothing left to say, nothing more that he could do. Maybe she was right, and he really had gone crazy.
He hardly cared. Ghosts, monsters, bring them on. He would welcome them, if they would only agree to put him out of his misery. In any case, he'd better get the hell out of there, to someplace where no one could see his face, because total meltdown was only seconds away.
"OK," he said. "I'll, uh, just get the fuck out of your way, then."
Chapter Twenty-Three
"I can't tell you how much I appreciate this," Barbara said into the phone. "I'll be there first thing Monday. This is exactly what I needed."
"I'm sorry it's only a temporary position, Mrs. Riggs, while the office manager is out on maternity leave," Ann Marie said. "But you know the organization so well after all those years of volunteering. We'll all put our heads together and come up with something else when she comes back. Everyone will be so happy to see you. We've missed you."
"I've missed you all, too. See you next week, then. 'Bye, now!"
She hung up the phone, floating with relief. Things were moving again. Her girls were safe, that horrible Novak was burned to a crisp, and Billy Vega was dead too, thank goodness. She was shedding no tears for him. She wasn't having those awful spells, and Erin's life was shaping up nicely. All was looking orderly and positive.
The doorbell buzzed, and she peered out the peephole. Erin's pretty little nurse friend, Tonia. At this hour, on a weekday. How odd. She opened the door. "Hello there, Tonia."
"Hi, Mrs. Riggs. I hope I'm not disturbing you."
"Not at all," Barbara said. "Come on in. Let's make some tea. You're just in time to help me celebrate. I just got a job! I'm so excited."
"That's so fabulous," Tonia said. "Where?"
"The literacy center where I used to volunteer. It's just temporary, but it's perfect to start with. Their office manager is about to have a baby. It's been a while since I've done much typing, but I can practice on their computers after closing time. I'll catch on."
"That'll be so great for you." Tonia followed her into the kitchen. "Look, Mrs. Riggs, I can't stay long, but there was something I wanted to talk to you about. I'm meeting Erin later on this afternoon."
"Oh, really?" She filled the kettle and put it on the stove.
"Yes. Connor made her promise not to go to Mueller's home unaccompanied." Tonia rolled her eyes. "Silly, if you think of it. Not that I mind. But for heaven's sake. She is a grown-up, after all."
"Yes, Connor is very protective," Barbara said. And that suited her just fine, she thought privately. Protection looked very good to her right now. Particularly for her precious girls. She was all for it.
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about, Mrs. Riggs. Connor's protectiveness. If you can call it that."
The edge in Tonia's voice made Barbara uneasy. She finished rinsing the teapot and set it down. "Yes, dear? What about it?"
Tonia hesitated. "Connor makes me nervous," she blurted. "He's so jealous and possessive. He's even hostile and suspicious of me."
"Ah, I see," Barbara said cautiously.
Tonia's blood-red fingernails flashed as she gesticulated. "I've seen women get involved with men like that. That's always the first sign of trouble, when a guy cuts a woman off from her girlfriends. It's a classic technique of abusive, controlling men."
Barbara opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
"Family's the next step," Tonia went on. "Snip, snip, and voila, she's totally isolated and in his thrall. Then he gets to work breaking down her self-esteem. Making her think she's nothing without him."
"Oh, my goodness. Really, Tonia, I don't think that Connor—"
"The problem is, she's smitten with him, and I can see why. He's a very attractive man. Handsome, charismatic, compelling. And I mean that literally. Compelling, Mrs. Riggs. He thinks she belongs to him."
Barbara's spine stiffened. "Ah. I see. Well. If he thinks that, he is very, very wrong."
"And it makes me nervous, to think of how angry he must be at your husband," Tonia said. "Sorry to bring up a painful topic, but I'm sure you don't want Erin to pay the price for that."
"Oh, but Connor would never take that out on Erin," Barbara said faintly. "He seems to really care about her. That's the impression I got."
The teapot was whistling. Tonia smoothly shouldered her out of the way and seized the kettle. "Here, let me. Sure he cares about her." She poured boiling water into the teapot. "He's obsessed with her. Did you know that he practically kidnapped her at the airport last weekend?"
Barbara sank down into a chair and frowned, bewildered. "Erin told me he went with her, but she didn't say anything about—"
"She didn't tell you all of it, and I'm not surprised," Tonia said. "He just showed up at the Portland airport, where she was supposed to meet Mueller's limo driver. She never got the chance. Connor dragged her to his car, drove her to a motel, and… well, you see the results, hmm? He got exactly what he wanted, didn't he?"
Barbara stared at her, horrified. "Erin's such a sweetheart," she whispered. "She can't bear to disappoint anyone. I hate to imagine, if she were all alone, and pressured by someone forceful and…"
"Compelling," Tonia supplied.
"Compelling." Barbara shuddered. "Oh, God. I hate to think of it."
"Exactly," Tonia said. "I see we're on the same wavelength, Mrs. Riggs. Maybe you should call around to other family members and friends, and Connor's former colleagues. Make everybody aware of the situation. Discreetly. Did you know that Connor has a family history of mental illness? His father. A sad, awful story. Paranoia, delusions, social alienation. He raised his sons up in the hills, in total isolation. No one knows for sure what happened to the mother."