Ahsoka smiled as the test cycle of her engine spun down. She’d be able to leave soon.
“No, thank you,” she said. “It’ll be easier on my own.”
“Is it some mysterious Jedi thing?” Bail asked. He hadn’t pried the previous day when she had left out a few key details, but now that they were sure not to be overheard, she supposed he had a right to know the risk he was taking.
“No,” she said. “It’s just difficult to explain. I might not have a lot of time and might have to make decisions quickly that don’t make sense to outsiders. It’s nothing personal, I promise.”
“That’s all right,” Bail said. “I’ve worked with enough Jedi over the years to know when to let them go their own way.”
“I’m not really a Jedi, you know,” she said. They hadn’t talked about it before, but again, now that they were alone, it was only fair to let him know that his investment might not get the return he was counting on. “I left the Temple, turned away from the Jedi path.”
“If you’re not a Jedi, then what are you, Ahsoka Tano?” Bail asked. “Because to be honest, you still sound and act like a Jedi to me.”
“I’ll let you know when I figure it out,” she said. She patted the engine pod. “Thanks for loaning me Artoo for the repair. The engine is perfect.”
“Anytime,” Bail said, and smiled. “I should get going. But we’ll be there when you signal for us.”
“I’ll see you then,” Ahsoka said, and watched him walk to his own shuttle.
Once the senator was gone, Ahsoka made a few last modifications to her ship and started her preflight checks. She’d had to make quick decisions the previous day, and she wanted to be sure that she hadn’t put stress on anything besides the engines. She had time and security to do it now, and even though waiting galled her, she knew it would pay off.
She hadn’t thought she’d be able to sleep at all the night before, the image of Kaeden with the lightsaber to her throat burned into her memory, but she’d been so exhausted that she’d dropped off almost as soon as she’d stopped moving. When she woke up several hours later, she’d felt much better and then instantly worse: Kaeden probably hadn’t slept very well, whatever time it was on Raada.
She forced herself to clear her mind of worries. It wasn’t easy, but she knew she would do her friends no good if she let emotion cloud her judgment. She might not be a Jedi, but she needed to act like one for a little bit longer. She knew how it worked, anyway: clear your mind and see the goal. She was determined to do that for the sake of her friends.
The preflight check ended, signaling that nothing new had been detected. She stowed her gear—the bastons, her carry bag, a few useful things that Bail had given her—but kept the pouch with the hilts on her. It was bulky now, but she was reluctant to store it anywhere else.
She asked for clearance to depart and received it, along with the deck officer’s wish of good luck. She took the ship out of the hangar and then ran her calculations for the hyperdrive.
When that was ready, Ahsoka placed both hands on the controls, looked through the front viewport, and made the jump to lightspeed.
Ilum was a world of ice. Stark, cold, and beautiful as long as you didn’t have to spend too much time outside. It had been a holy place for the Jedi. Ahsoka had been there three times, once for each of her own crystals and once with a group of younglings. The first two times had been unremarkable, except for her excitement over having the tools with which to build her lightsabers. The third time had been more of an adventure, complete with pirates. Ahsoka was very much hoping this visit would be a quiet one.
She’d calculated the jump to take her out of hyperspace some distance away from the planet itself. If she remembered what was buried in Ilum’s crust, it was entirely possible that others did, too. She wasn’t sure where those from the dark side got their crystals, but she knew they had to get them somewhere, and she wasn’t about to take any risks just to cut some time from her travel schedule. When she emerged back into normal space and saw what was waiting for her, she was very glad she’d been cautious.
There were at least two Star Destroyers and a massive mining ship in orbit around the planet. The Empire definitely knew there was something it wanted beneath the surface of the icy world.
The planet itself was much worse off than she’d feared. Before, it had looked like a giant white ball from orbit—uniform in color except the brighter spots where it reflected the light of its sun. It had been as striking from up high as it was on the ground, even though the great cliffs and deep crevasses that scored the planet’s surface weren’t visible from afar. Now it almost hurt her to look at it.
Great chunks of the planet had been carved away, exposing rock and lava that boiled up from the planet’s core. With no real hope, Ahsoka scanned the usual landing site. Gone was the cliff-side entryway the Jedi had used for generations, the waterfall smashed to gain entrance to the cave beyond.
Ahsoka felt a swell of fury, which she had to work hard to pin down. They dared to invade Ilum, to spoil such a beautiful place, and for what? To carve out rock and dirt in the hopes of finding a few shards of crystal that none of them would be able to see? It was wasteful and terrible to behold, and also more than a little intimidating. Ruining the soil on a faraway moon was one thing. Destroying a planet, even piece by piece, was something else. The Empire had no sense of limitation and no respect for the order of life in the galaxy.
She was halfway through planning an attack run on the mining ship, analyzing it for weaknesses she could exploit if she was able to get past the Star Destroyers, when she remembered why she couldn’t. Raada. She needed to go back to Raada. She couldn’t die or get captured in some pointless skirmish. And it would be pointless, she reminded herself, even though it hurt to think of Ilum as expendable. No one lived there, and it wasn’t like the Jedi needed the planet anymore. She wouldn’t spend her life there, not when there were other places where it was worth more and when there were people who needed her.
She was still going to need crystals though. And she needed to get out of range of the Star Destroyers before one of them detected her. She flew to the outermost planet in the system, a nameless black rock with no air and little gravity, and set down on the surface. She powered down the engines so the ship would be more difficult to detect and then sat cross-legged on the floor of the cockpit, the pouch in her lap and her mind reaching for solutions.
It didn’t bode well that her plan had unraveled at her very first stop, but she couldn’t focus on that now. She had to focus on what came next and how she might achieve it without using Ilum as a resource.
Now that her mind was quieter, she could sense the icy planet, even though she was half a system away. The crystals there didn’t sing to her as they had the first time she’d been there. Then, when she was younger, she’d felt them as soon as the ship dropped out of hyperspace, even though she hadn’t known what she was feeling at the time. Now there was nothing—well, nothing that was intended for Ahsoka. She could still feel the crystals present beneath the planet’s surface. She just knew that none of them was for her.
So where are mine? she thought. Am I going to get another set? I could go back to Rex’s fake grave and see if my lightsabers are still there, but I doubt it. They’re worth too much, and I left them to be found.
She called up a star chart, projecting it around herself and placing Ilum close to where she was seated. Then she closed her eyes and reached for the crystals on the planet below. She followed their structure, ordered and regular, searching for other sources in the galaxy. She knew there must be more crystals somewhere. Master Yoda had never said as much, but he had certainly hinted at it. It was, after all, a very big galaxy.