She had disowned Amy before it was over.
"You want to try again?" Amy asked.
He was startled. "What?"
"She is my mother, Moyshe."
He reached across the table, took her hand for a second. "I know." She was doing her brave act to conceal her pain. "I know. I've got one too. And she isn't that much different."
"They want the best for you. And they think they're the ones to decide what's best." Amy gulped several mouthfuls. "Mother never was good at expressing feelings positively. Maybe that's why I'm a little weird. I spent a lot of time with her while I was growing up. She never qualified for fleet duty. That was the big disappointment of her life. Till we gave her something else to feel sorry for herself about."
Amy almost never mentioned her father. All Moyshe ever learned was his name and the fact that he had been killed in an accident here in the nebula. Apparently, despite protestations to the contrary, Amy's mother had found the accident convenient.
"We'd better not go back, Moyshe," Amy decided. "Not today. Let's give her a chance to calm down and get used to the idea."
"Okay."
They had to kill four hours before a shuttle became available. Moyshe thought Amy would use the time to visit old friends. She did not. She said all her real friends were aboard Danion. She became defensive. She did not want to face any more disapproval. The stay-at-home Seiners were, apparently, less cosmopolitan than the people of the harvestfleets.
Going back, Amy suggested, "If you want, tomorrow we can sneak over and see those alien ships. The research center isn't that far."
Moyshe perked up a little. "All right. That's a good idea. I've been looking forward to it. What do we do about our work assignments?"
"I'll take care of everything."
Amy took sleeping pills as soon as they reached their cabin. Despite a long, long day, Moyshe was not in the mood for bed. He strolled down the passageway and awakened Mouse.
"How'd the get-together go?" Mouse asked. And, without awaiting an answer, "That bad, eh?"
"It's a whole different world, Mouse. I thought I knew how to handle prejudice... I never saw anything like it. Her mother was the worst, but there was plenty everywhere else we went, too."
"I know. Grace took me for a little tour this morning."
"You guys got out of bed long enough?"
"Hey, you got to do something the other twenty-three hours of the day."
"So tell me. And where's the board? I've been here three minutes and I still haven't seen a chess board."
"Sorry." Mouse grinned. BenRabi had accused him of being unable to relate with the human male unless a chess board was interposed. "Guess I'm preoccupied."
"She show you anything interesting?"
"I'm not sure. You can't break the habits of trade-craft. So you look and you listen. But you don't find anything that gives you a handle on these people."
"Where'd you go?"
"To some kind of office complex first. Like a government and trade headquarters. We hunked around there for five hours. They had everything out in the open... You know, like no confidential files or anything, and nobody getting excited because you pick up a paper and read it. You take white. But there wasn't anything there. I mean, nothing anybody back home would give a damn about. I didn't see a damned thing worth remembering."
"What the hell kind of weird move is that?"
Mouse smiled. "Some Seiner pulled that on me the other day."
"And lost."
"Yeah. But I was better than him. Hey. You know what they're doing? They're getting ready to go back to Stars' End."
"That isn't any secret."
"No. But they're so damned serious. I mean, Grace and I went to this one asteroid they were making into a dry-dock. After we left the other place. I got to talking to this engineer. Her husband is on the team that's adapting a shuttle to piggyback the Stars' End weapons to orbit."
BenRabi raised his attention from the board. "Curious. Everywhere you go... They're so damned sure of themselves, aren't they?"
"Awfully. Maybe we're too sure they can't do it. Maybe they have an angle." Mouse's attention had left the board too. He seemed to have a question he was afraid to ask. Moyshe felt the intensity of it, boiling there behind his friend's eyes.
"I've got a hunch that they do. Through the starfish, somehow."
Mouse returned to the game. His unorthodox opening got him into trouble early. BenRabi had him on the ropes, but let him wriggle loose by making a too-eager move. It cost him a knight.
"You always did get too excited," Mouse observed. "How has your head been?"
"I had a headache today. Just tension, though. Why?"
"Just asking." A move later, "What I meant was that disorientation stuff you had because of the Psych program. Any trouble?"
"Not much. Not like it was, I have my moments. You know. Blanking out for a second, then coming back wondering where I am and who I am. They don't amount to anything. They don't last long enough for anybody to notice."
"Good. I was scared when you were doing that Contact stuff. Thought you might get mixed up while you were in, and come back somebody else permanently."
"You didn't, by chance, have anything to do with getting me transferred, did you?"
"I would have if I'd thought I had the drag. For your own good. But I didn't." Mouse rose, indicated that Moyshe should follow him. He stepped into the passageway, tapping his ear.
"What is it?"
"Don't want them to know I know this. The orders came from up top. Way up top. I know this woman who works in Communications. She told me a couple things she thought I already knew. Naturally, I played along."
"Naturally. If it's female, you'll go along with anything."
Mouse grinned. "One of these days I'll tell you about the Admiral sending me to pimp school. Whoring isn't the oldest profession. Pimping is. You'd be knocked on your ass if you saw what a really good pimp can do with women."
"He sent you to school?"
"Yeah. Hell, Moyshe, it's the oldest trick in the spy business. You teach a guy how to make a woman fall for him, then turn him loose on the women who work for the organization you want to penetrate."
"I thought it worked the other way around. Women seducing men."
"It's done. It doesn't work as well. Men don't respond the same to emotional blackmail."
"What did your friend have to say? We can't stay out here too long."
"Buddy, we're headed for the top. Somebody upstairs has decided we're the medicine Seiner foreign relations needs. This auction project is a test. If we come through, they'll give us a shot at setting up our own secret service."
BenRabi had had a few hints. He had formed a few suspicions. Still, he was not ready for the truth.
"A real fleetwide secret service. Inside and out. Intelligence and counter-intelligence. The works. For all the Starfishers. The way it sounds, they'll give us anything we want and turn us loose. They've got friends landside who try to keep them informed. The friends have fed them enough, the last couple of years, to get them worried about what's going on in Luna Command."
"Ah. I begin to smell the rat. We've got connections. We could turn a few of our old buddies."
"You've got it."
"How do you feel about it?"
"I was about to ask you, Moyshe."
"After you."
"All right."
"All right. It would be a challenge. We'd be going head to head with the Old Man. It would be a hell of a match-up."
BenRabi was not pleased. "I take it you're excited."
"Damned right I am. Not meaning to brag, but if we'd gone back, I'd have had Beckhart's job eventually. He said so himself. And you'd have become my Chief of Operations. He thought we had what it takes, Moyshe. You see what I'm driving at?"