And look how well that’s going, I think. But it’s time to back off. ‘OK. I just thought you were bored.’
‘I am.’ She props herself up on an elbow, giving me a look. ‘I can think of better things to do, though.’
I busy myself with the food and pretend not to hear. Today there’s a thick hunk of bread and a bowl of cassoulet, with pale beans and chunks of sausage. It’s almost black, with nebulae of white fat suspended in it. Gretchen pulls a face as I fork up a piece.
‘I don’t know how you can eat that stuff.’
‘What’s wrong with it?’
‘Nothing’s wrong with it. I just don’t like blood sausage.’
‘Blood sausage?’
She grins at my expression. ‘Didn’t you know?’
No, I didn’t. I look at the dark paste and globules of fat. An image comes to mind of the stunned pig hanging by its hind legs while Georges puts the knife to its throat. I remember the sound of the blood splashing into the metal bucket. And behind that are other images, even less welcome.
I put the sausage down and set my plate aside.
‘Have I put you off?’ Gretchen asks.
‘I wasn’t hungry.’
I take a drink of water to rinse away the taste. There’s a distracting tickle on my arm. An ant is questing inquisitively on my skin. Brushing it off, I see there are dozens milling around in the grass, ferrying breadcrumbs into a hole between the cobbles.
Gretchen cranes her head to see what’s caught my attention. ‘What is it?’
‘Just ants.’
She moves closer to examine them. Picking up a handful of soil, she begins to trickle it in their path. The ants dash around in circles, antennae waving, then form a new line that bypasses the obstacle.
‘Don’t do that.’
‘Why? They’re only ants.’
She follows them with the soil. I turn away, annoyed by the casual cruelty, which is probably why I say what I do.
‘Who was your father’s business partner?’
Gretchen carries on sifting soil through her fist, letting it fall onto the ants. ‘Papa didn’t have a business partner.’
‘He says he did. The one who helped him with the statues.’
‘Louis worked for us. He wasn’t Papa’s partner.’
It’s the first time I’ve heard his name. ‘OK. But he’s Michel’s father, isn’t he?’
‘What’s it got to do with you?’
‘Nothing. Forget I asked.’
Gretchen picks up another handful of soil and drops it onto the mouth of the ants’ hole. ‘It was Mathilde’s fault.’
‘What was?’
‘Everything. She got pregnant and caused a row, and that’s why Louis left. He’d still be here if not for her.’
‘I thought you said he’d let you all down?’
‘He did, but it wasn’t all his fault.’ She shrugs. Her eyes have a far-away look, as though something inside her has switched off. ‘He was good-looking. And fun. He was always teasing Georges, asking him if he was married to one of the sows, things like that.’
‘Sounds hilarious.’
Gretchen takes the comment at face value. ‘He was. There was this one time he took a piglet and dressed it up in his old handkerchief, like a nappy. Georges was furious when he found out, because Louis dropped it and broke its leg. He was going to tell Papa until Mathilde made him promise to say it was an accident. It would only have made Papa angry. And the sanglochons aren’t Georges’s anyway, so he’d no right to make a fuss.’
‘What happened to the piglet?’
‘Georges had to slaughter it. But it was a sucker, so we got a good price.’
The more I hear about this Louis, the less I like him. I can’t imagine Mathilde with someone like that, but as soon as I think it I realize how ridiculous I’m being. It isn’t as if I really know anything about her.
‘So where’s Louis now?’
‘I told you, Mathilde made him go away.’
‘But is he still living in town?’
Gretchen’s face has hardened; she looks every inch her father’s daughter. She throws the last of the dirt down onto the ants. ‘Why are you so interested?’
‘I only wondered if Mathilde—’
‘Stop going on about Mathilde! Why are you always asking about her?’
‘I’m not—’
‘Yes you are! Mathilde, Mathilde, Mathilde! I hate her! She spoils everything! She’s jealous of me because she’s old and droopy and she knows men want me more than her!’
I raise my hands, trying to placate her. ‘OK, calm down.’
But Gretchen is far from calm. The skin around her nose has turned white. ‘You want to screw her, don’t you? Or are you fucking her already?’
This is getting out of hand. I climb to my feet.
‘Where are you going?’
‘To work on the house.’
‘To see Mathilde, you mean?’ I don’t bother to respond. I reach down to pick up the plate but she dashes it from my hands. ‘Don’t ignore me! I said don’t ignore me!’
She snatches up the fork and lashes out. I jerk back but the tines snag my arm, tearing the flesh.
‘Jesus …!’
I grab the fork from her and fling it away. A dark trickle of blood runs down my arm as I clamp my hand to the wound. I stare at Gretchen, more shocked than anything. She’s blinking as though she’s just woken up.
‘I’m sorry. I–I didn’t mean to …’
‘Just go.’ My voice is unsteady.
‘I said I’m sorry.’
I don’t trust myself to speak. After a moment Gretchen contritely gathers up the plate and cutlery, her hair hanging like a curtain over her face. Without another word she takes them around to the courtyard and disappears.
I stay where I am, waiting for my heart to slow down. The fork has left four parallel cuts in my bicep. Bloody, but not deep. I press my hand over them again. At my feet, the ants are swarming over the spilled food in an orgy of activity. The ones Gretchen killed have already been forgotten: all that counts is survival.
Leaving them to their feast, I go into the barn to clean my arm.
The sunset is spectacular. The dragonflies, bees and wasps that patrol the lake during the day have been replaced by midges and mosquitoes. Sitting with my back against the chestnut tree, I blow cigarette smoke into the air. I read somewhere that insects don’t like it, but these don’t seem to know that. I’m bitten already, but I won’t really feel them until the morning. Tomorrow can take care of itself.
I’ve brought Mathilde’s book with me. The peace is absolute, but I’ve no stomach for Madame Bovary tonight. The novel lies beside me, unopened, as I watch the last rays of sun turn the lake’s surface into a dark mirror.
My arm is sore where the fork tore it, but the cuts are only superficial. I washed them under the tap, letting the frigid water sluice away the blood. It ran in pink trails across the cobbles, draining into the widening crack in the patch of concrete. Another of my predecessor’s legacies. I told Mathilde I’d caught it on the scaffold and asked for cotton wool and sticking plaster. I thought it better to dress it myself than explain how I’d come by equidistant cuts. Your sister stabbed me with a fork because she hasn’t forgiven you for splitting up with Michel’s father. Who she seems to have liked a little too much.
No, that’s one conversation I’d rather avoid. Still, if Gretchen had a crush on Louis it would explain some of the tension between her and Mathilde. And maybe it was more than a crush, I think, remembering the crude drawing I found in his notebook. The naked woman could have been either of them, and Louis doesn’t sound the sort of man who’d have qualms about sleeping with both sisters.
Now who’s jealous?
The chestnut tree is full of spiny globes. They aren’t fully grown, but one of them has dropped prematurely and lies in the grass nearby. I pick it up, feeling the prickle of its spines in my palm. The sun has dipped below the trees now, and a dusky twilight has descended on the lake. I get to my feet and stand at the edge of the bluff. The chestnut makes a tiny splash when I throw it into the water. It floats like a miniature mine, bobbing above the darker shadow that marks the submerged rock.