“Protecting Alexandra,” I said.
“Shit,” he said. “Can I change my answer? That sounds a lot less selfish than mine.”
“You are selfish,” I said.
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, dismissing it. “Hey, my plan was going to cover yours, too. Now I answered you, so you answer me. What are you doing here? What do you even mean by ‘protecting Alexandra’?”
“I had thought to make an appearance,” I said. “Kejetan would think it strange if neither of us showed ourselves around here anymore. I wanted him to believe that, as you humans say, it is busy-ness as usual.”
Caleb laughed. “Close enough. You really think you’re up for pulling one over on Kejetan the Accursed? You’re pretty easy to read. Your wings betray you. Right now, they’re twitching, meaning I’m annoying you. If I can see through you, maybe you should fly away now while you still can. I don’t need your ruining this.”
His attitude over the last few minutes, mixed with his laughter, struck a chord in me, one of anger. “And do you think you will do any better manipulating my father?”
“Don’t think I don’t know what this is all about,” he said, wagging a finger in my face.
“I do not know what you mean.”
“Bullshit,” he said. “If you had your way, you’d actually crush my head.”
It was true the desire was strong in me, but I did not wish to give the human satisfaction.
“I wish no such thing,” I said. “But would it be such a stretch, human? You did torture me.”
Caleb sighed. “I told you I didn’t even think there was a lick of humanity to you,” he said, throwing his arms up the air, his voice filled with exasperation.
I knew that particular feeling all too well and stepped up to him, staring down into his eyes.
“That does not change the fact that it happened.”
The human looked ready to burst, but he had no immediate answer for that and fell silent for a moment. It was a petty victory, but a victory nonetheless. The sensation felt most gratifying.
Caleb walked off in silence and moved about ten feet away before turning back to me. He looked around the empty hold, making sure we were alone.
“You know what?” he said. “I don’t think any of this is about what I did to you.”
My wings fluttered in reaction, and I cursed myself for it, but his words caught me off guard. “No?”
“No,” he said, marching back up to me. “I think this is all about Lexi. She spoke about the connection you two once shared when you were bound to her family. I think you want that back, and it kills you a little to see her wrapped up in me.”
It was strange to hear this person I knew so little of speak of private matters that were only the business of the Belarus bloodline, and I raised my voice.
“The affairs of this family are none of your concern.”
“Lexi’s made them my concern,” he said, rapping his knuckles against the stone of my chest, scraping them against it until the skin tore and a hint of blood rose to the surface. He held his bloody fingers up to my face. “And, really, what can you offer her? Abrasions? A skinned knee?”
The sight of human flesh torn due to me in any capacity filled my thoughts of Alexandra coming to harm from contact with me, and I forced myself to keep control of the darkness rising within me. “You know nothing of the bond between Alexandra and me.”
“I know it’s broken,” he said. “What she feels for me is there because it happened naturally, not because someone wove a spell over me to make that connection happen.”
My arm shot out as I grabbed him by the edges of his coat and lifted him.
“Perhaps you have woven your magic over her,” I said. “Perhaps you poisoned Alexandra’s better judgment with your elixirs, your potions, your magic that lives in your tiny bottles. But its power never lasts too long, does it? It is only a matter of time before she sees you as you truly are.”
Anger coursed through me, but was it because he was antagonizing me or because he spoke the truth about a jealousy I had of mortal man? I stared at Caleb in contemplation of this, raging within, but the eyes that met mine had become calm.
“Let’s face facts,” he said bluntly. “The lovely Miss Belarus prefers my company to yours. You’re nothing more than a family heirloom.”
His words stung, but I put him down and turned away before I did something impulsive. Regardless of the truth of the matter, I needed to keep my calm aboard Kejetan’s freighter.
Caleb straightened the edges of his coat, tugging the fabric into place until it was once more smooth against his form.
“And even if there was something more between you and her,” he said, circling around to meet my eye, “what could there ever truly be between the two of you? Think about it. She’s human. What kind of a life would that be with her? With me she stands a chance of being a part of humanity, of actually being happy.”
As much as I did not want to admit it, the alchemist had a point, but that did not mean it sat well within me. I fumed over it in silence until he shook his head and headed for the door out of the room.
“Where are you going?” I asked, blocking his way.
He met my eye, his gaze unwavering. “Move, Stanis,” he said. “There is work to be done here on this ship. I need to talk to Kejetan if I’m going to keep him unaware that his stone ‘Dobbie’ is a free gargoyle now.”
I did not know what this Dobbie was, but I stayed in front of the door, unmoving. “I can handle that myself,” I said.
Caleb sighed. “No, you can’t,” he said, stuffing his hands down into the pockets of his coats. “You don’t have the practice at lying that I do. Trust me. You go in to your father, in front of your own kin—”
“He is not my kin,” I growled.
Caleb stepped back and pointed at me with both hands. “You see? You get so agitated at even the mention of him, and that’s what’s going to ruin it. You don’t stand a chance of convincing that mad pile of rocks that you’re still under his sway gathering statues for him. Go home, Stanis. Go back to the Belarus Building and let me handle this.”
I could not argue with him and stepped aside, though it hurt my soul to give this man anything. “You will never have the bond that Alexandra and I share.”
Caleb did not look back. He simply walked out the door. “Get out of here, Stan,” he said, his voice flat. “Leave the lying to the professionals.”
The alchemist turned out of sight, and by the time I went out through the same door moments later, he had already disappeared into the freighter.
I flew off, frustrated, but knowing the human had probably been right in handling the situation himself. I could have stayed and argued, but I had not, choosing instead the chill of the night against my body as I shot across the night sky.
The heaviest question that lay across my heart, however, was not about dealing with my father.
Was I fighting with this Caleb to keep Alexandra safe or was it because of his connection with her? And what if Caleb was correct, saying that my bond to her had only existed because the last practicing Spellmason from centuries ago had put it there?
It left a hole within me that, for the moment, I could only fill with the joy that flight brought me, but the question still lingered.
How could I trust that my feelings were my own?
Twenty-one
Alexandra
The threat of rain hung in the night air as the group of us worked atop my family’s building. Caleb had moved his mixing station from the other night just inside the covered doorway leading back downstairs. In his hands, colorful concoctions flew from one vial to another while flasks and beakers foamed with other mixtures. Very mad-scientist. All the while, Caleb consulted his notes, adjusted volumes with a care and precision that boggled my mind. He had even been set up and hard at work before the rest of us got here.