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She crumbled into my arms and started to sob.  My reaction was automatic; I held her close, running my hand over her hair, trying to soothe her.  The anger left me, and I felt the need to make everything alright for her.  “Where were you, baby?” I asked.

She didn’t answer me and Scott barked at her, “Answer us, Madison.  Where the fuck were you?”

I looked up at him, anger burning through me again, but this time directed at him, “Back the fuck off, brother.  In fact, everyone get the fuck out of here,” I bellowed, and when no one moved, I added, “Now!”

People started moving out of the room and Scott stood there glaring at me for a minute or so, and then he left too.

I pulled back a little from Madison, to look in her eyes, “Baby, what’s going on?  Talk to me.”

Her eyes slid to mine and the heartache I saw there stabbed me in the fucking heart.  “I went to Bec’s house.  I just sat outside and remembered stuff, you know, the good times we’d had, even the bad.  J, I miss her so much.  I can’t believe she’s gone.  Even though we weren’t friends anymore, I always thought we’d patch it up.”  The tears were streaming down her face now.

“Fuck,” I didn’t know what else to say.  I was useless at this shit, so I just pulled her close again and held her, letting her get it all out.

Eventually she unwrapped her arms from me and wiped the tears from her face.  “Sorry.  I guess it is really hitting me, now that I am back here,” she apologised.

“No need to say sorry.  But the next time you want to take off, for fuck’s sake, let one of us know where you’re going.  Okay?”

She scowled at me, “Okay.”

I doubted she meant it.  Madison did whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted.  “Nix is back apparently.  That is why we were all pissed at you.  Plus, and you might find this hard to believe, we all care about you.”

She stayed quiet for a moment appraising me, and then she offered, “Thank you.  I’m going to bed now.  Goodnight.”

She left and I stood in stunned silence; she had surprised the fuck out of me and I hated to admit it but my heart was starting to want what my dick wanted.

Chapter 11

Madison

I woke up the next morning feeling low.  Remembering Bec last night had been hard and I was thankful that J had been there for me when I got back.  That was a hard thing to admit to myself.  I just wanted to hate him and not have anything to do with him, but then he had to go and be nice to me.  And the things he did to my body.  God, I was so messed up about him.  He’d been back in my life for less than a week and here I was, wanting him all over again.

I decided to put thoughts of J aside and focus on my plan to move back here.  First order of business would be to call Gina and let her know I wouldn’t be coming back to work.  Thank goodness I had saved some money to get me through until I found a job here.

I grabbed my phone and dialled her number.  “Hi, babe,” she answered.

“Hey, Gina.  I have some bad news for you.” I decided to get straight to the point.

“You’re not coming back are you?”

“I’m so sorry to do this at such short notice but no, I am staying here.  My friend’s kid needs me,” I answered her, really regretting having to do this to her.

“I understand, and actually wondered if you might end up staying.  You’re just lucky I love you, otherwise I would send Zane after you,” she threatened, but I heard the smile in her voice.

I shuddered at that thought.  Zane was Blake’s and Gina’s brother, and a man you didn’t mess with.  I had only met him a few times and he scared the living shit out of me.  I never asked Gina or Blake much about him because I really just didn’t want to know who or what he was.

We chatted a bit more and I promised to visit her often before hanging up.  I scrolled through my phone and hit Blake’s number.

“Baby girl, how are you?” he said as he answered his phone.

“Have you got a few hours?” I asked, jokingly.

He chuckled, “That bad?  Do you need me to come and sort shit out?”

The thing about Blake was that, he would do that for me.  In a heartbeat.  “I appreciate that but no, you’ve got your own things to take care of and I’m a big girl; it’s time for me to sort out everything I walked away from years ago.”

“Yeah, I guess it is.  How’s J?  Still being a caveman?”  I could hear the annoyance in his voice.

“J will always be a caveman, it’s just who he is.  I’m so confused about him, Blake.”  I decided that perhaps a guy’s perspective might be insightful.

“In what way?”

I hadn’t ever told my friends much about my relationship with J so I figured it was time to open up a bit now; especially if I wanted advice.  “I left Brisbane because he told me to.  We had been broken up for about six months but I thought we were going to get back together, and then he told me he didn’t love me anymore and that I needed to leave.  He was the one who lined my job up with Gina, through another club member who knew her, I think.  He said I needed space from the club to get my drinking sorted.  He broke my heart but I thought I was over him.  Now I’m not so sure.  And he is running hot and cold with me; one minute being an asshole and then being nice.  I don’t know what the fuck to make of it all.”

“Talk to him.  But you need to work out what you want first,” he said.

“You are such a guy, Blake.  You make it sound so easy,” I sighed.  Why did guys think that every situation was so black and white?

“Well, why do women make everything so hard?” he asked.

“We don’t!”

He laughed, “Yeah, you do.  We’ll have to agree to disagree.  Just promise me you’ll talk to him.”

“I’ll try but all we seem to do is argue so it might not be as easy as you suggest,” I promised.

“Show him a bit of leg, it’ll shut him up for a minute and give you time to talk,” he suggested.

Now it was my turn to laugh. “Great plan, maybe I’ll flash my tits too, you know, to give me even more time.”

“Settle down, you want him to be coherent don’t you?  Flashing your tits will send all the blood from his brain to his dick.  Take my advice, no tits.”

“Okay, legs it is.  Now, did Serena tell you that I’m moving back here?” I asked, and we talked some more about my move and what was going on in his life before ending the call.  I knew it wouldn’t be long before one of us made the trip to visit the other; we couldn’t go too long without needing to see each other.

* * *

“Madison, good to see you, babe.”

I’d made my way downstairs to the club bar, and now turned towards the voice I knew so well and threw myself at him.  “Nash.  I’ve missed you,” I said, as we hugged.

“You’re still as fucking hot as you were last time I saw you,” he said, looking me up and down.

“And you’re still as fucking pervy as you were last time I saw you, “I slapped him on the arm, all the while smiling at him.

He grinned that wicked smile I remembered and shrugged.  “Yep, and still the hot ass you missed out on when you chose that fucker, J.”

Now it was my turn to grin at him, “Didn’t know what I was getting myself into there, did I?  And to think I could have had you.”

“Fucker’s still got a hard on for you, too.  He’s got pussy anywhere he wants but none of it does what you did for him,” Nash said, shaking his head.

What the fuck?  My mouth dropped open in shock, and I was about to quiz him when we were interrupted.