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‘Yes… May and I live just down from Jeannie and Lou.’

‘Who?’

‘Jeannie and Lou. The twins. You must have seen them. Lovely girls.’

‘We’ve seen them,’ she smirked.

The doctor checked her blood pressure and measured her height and weight, then checked George over too. Dr Kerr had been talking constantly throughout the appointment and Michelle wondered if he’d listened to anything she’d said. He had. He’d taken it all in. He’d been doing this job for so long he made it look easier than he should have, to the point where it seemed he was no longer concentrating. It took Michelle by surprise when his expression suddenly changed and became more serious. He looked straight into her eyes and held her gaze. ‘Your wrist,’ he said. ‘I noticed it was tender. I could see from the way you were holding it.’

‘I twisted it the other night.’

‘A bit accident prone, are you?’

‘No more than anyone else. Why?’

‘Just that you’ve had a lot of little injuries recently.’

She shifted awkwardly in her seat. ‘It’s par for the course when you have kids. Always on the go, you know how it is…’

He smiled. ‘I know how it is. Is everything all right at home?’

‘Fine. It will be once we’re settled, anyway.’

‘Good,’ he said, smiling again. He adjusted his glasses and looked at his computer screen, struggling to control the cursor with the mouse. ‘Fluoxetine. Now, how long have you been taking that?’

She struggled to remember. ‘Six or seven months, I think. Maybe a little longer.’

‘Things been tough?’

‘Very tough.’

‘The depression any better?’

‘I’m getting there.’

‘Is that why you’re here?’

‘No, we just wanted to register as patients and the lady said I had to book an appointment so…’

‘No, not here, here. Is that why you moved to Thussock?’

‘Partly.’

‘Do you want to come off the pills?’

‘Eventually. Now’s really not the time, though.’

‘Why not?’

‘New house… my husband’s got a new job and the girls have started a new school…’

‘Fair enough. Got enough to last you a while?’

‘A few weeks.’

‘Will you come in and see me again when you’re running out?’

‘Okay.’

‘And in the meantime, don’t do anything silly. If you’re feeling low, come straight back and see me. Take no crap from Alice. Call at the house if it’s out of hours.’

‘Thanks. I’m not about to do anything stupid, you know.’

‘Glad to hear it.’

‘I think I’d have already done it by now if I was.’

‘I get that impression. You seem like you have your head screwed on, Michelle.’

She wasn’t sure how to respond to that. ‘Thanks.’

He paused and looked at the screen again, doing all he could to make his next question sound as casual as possible. ‘And how are things between you and your husband? You’ve been under a lot of pressure, I imagine.’

‘You don’t know the half of it.’

‘I’m sure that’s true. You’re okay, though?’

A moment of hesitation. ‘We’re okay.’

‘And you?’

‘I’m okay.’

‘I’m looking forward to meeting the rest of the family.’

‘They’re great kids.’

‘I’ve no doubt. Just remember, if you need to see me, I’m only a little way down the road.’

‘I will,’ she said. ‘Thanks.’

And Michelle watched the doctor as he added to his notes, and all she could think was he knows.

#

Michelle phoned Jackie and arranged to skip the toddler group session and do coffee together instead. She didn’t feel like spending time with the sour, stony-faced women in the community hall. She felt like going back home even less.

Jackie’s terraced house was right on the main road through town, protected from the traffic by a waist-high wire-mesh fence and a narrow sunken pavement. Over the years the constant fumes had blackened the front of the building. Half-hearted attempts had been made to clean patches, but that had just spread the muck about. The whole building was dirty-looking.

Michelle drove past then took the next left and pulled up behind a car she thought she recognised. It was an old Ford Focus. Dirty and full of crap, it was splattered with mud and its exhaust was hanging off. It took her a while to remember where she’d seen it before. It had been less than a week, but it felt much longer. When she saw the man who’d stopped to speak to her and Tammy at the bus-stop last Sunday evening, it clicked. He emerged from Jackie’s front door and gave way to Michelle. Shifty-looking bugger, she thought. He was wearing the same faded football shirt as before, the same denim jacket too.

‘Sorry,’ she said as they side-stepped each other and both did a double-take. The man made less of an effort than she did, brushing up against her.

‘No apology necessary,’ he said, staring for a little too long. ‘You must be Michelle.’

The seedy man made her flesh crawl, but she did what she could not to let it show. ‘That’s right. How did you…?’

‘Psychic,’ he said quickly. He broke into a huge smile and an over-exaggerated laugh which seemed to fill the entire street. ‘Not really. I’m many things, lover, but psychic ain’t one of them. Jack’ll tell you.’

Michelle looked up and saw Jackie standing on the doorstep, wearing a short dressing gown and not a lot else. ‘Piss off, Dez,’ she said. ‘That useless bugger is my other half,’ she explained as she beckoned Michelle inside. ‘Really landed on my feet with that one, eh?’

‘Nice to meet you again,’ Michelle said, turning back around, but Dez had already gone. A couple of seconds later his car raced past the front of the house at a ridiculous speed, the noise of its tired exhaust taking an age to disappear.

‘Again?’ Jackie asked, puzzled. Michelle explained as she followed her into her small, cluttered house. They went through into the kitchen, every available bit of work surface covered with crockery, saucepans and food.

‘I was having a bit of trouble with my eldest last Sunday evening. She had a strop and walked off. I was sitting in the bus shelter with her, trying to get her to come home, and he stopped to check we were okay. I think he was just concerned.’

‘You reckon? Perving, more like. Funny, though, he never said anythin’.’

‘Probably forgot about it ’til now. I had.’ Michelle thought she should try and steer the conversation into safer waters. ‘So what does Dez do?’

‘As little as he has to,’ Jackie answered quickly as she filled the kettle.

‘And you’re okay with that?’

‘Don’t have a lot of choice, really. As long as he brings enough money in, I’ve learned not to ask too many questions.’

‘Like that, is it?’

She laughed. ‘I’m making it sound worse than it is. Dez isn’t scared of hard work, but he can’t hold down a regular job to save his life. He does odd jobs for people, helps folks out, all cash in hand. Everybody knows Dez.’

Michelle couldn’t help asking. ‘What kind of odd jobs?’

‘Whatever needs doin’. Look, I know it sounds dodgy, but it’s all kosher. He just does things different to everyone else, that’s all. People jump to the wrong conclusion too easy about Dezzie.’

‘Sorry, I…’

‘I didn’t mean you, love. He gets it all the time. Just this Saturday gone Sergeant Ross stopped him for no good reason. Mind you, he was off to see his mate with a load of beer and knocked-off DVDs in the back of the car. Dez don’t exactly help himself.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Ah, he asks for trouble half the time. Carryin’ on like he’d a load of hard-core porn stashed away or worse.’