I went to fetch my notepad, not happy about the dialogue between us. But at least it was a dialogue. By the time we were done refining our inquiries, it was almost eleven. I wrapped up the cold leftovers and stuck them in the fridge. I faced my father and made eye contact. “I like him, Daddy.”
“It’s important to like the person you’re dating.”
I tapped my toe. “Well, we’ll see what happens. It’s probably premature to talk about it.”
“For what it’s worth, I liked him, too, Cin.”
“It’s worth a lot to me.”
“A definite step up from your last fling.”
I hit my father’s shoulder. “I’m ready if you are.”
“Then let’s do it.” He threw his arm around my shoulder. “You tell your mother about him yet?”
“Like I said, it’s premature.”
Dad didn’t respond. He knew bullshit when he heard it.
Earlier in the weekend,Sarah had been discharged from the hospital. She was facing a court hearing on Wednesday, but for now she was out on a five-thousand-dollar bail bond and placed in her sister’s charge. Dad was pleased that Sarah was home: It was much easier to interview someone in the comfort of familiar surroundings. By the time we made it to Louise Sanders’s house, it was after twelve. She answered the door wrapped in a terry-cloth housecoat, a steaming mug of something in her left hand. She wasn’t overjoyed about our visit, but she did invite us in.
“It’s nothing personal, Officer Decker,” she told me. “You were very nice to us. I’m just tired of answering questions.”
“I can understand that.”
“I should get dressed.”
“You don’t have to bother, Louise. This is my father, Lieutenant Decker. We were in the neighborhood and thought we’d drop by to see how Sarah was doing.”
Dad and Louise exchanged smiles. He said, “How’s she dealing with everything?”
Louise laughed. “Honestly? I think she’s delighted by all the attention.”
“And how are you coping?”
Nice choice of words, Dad.Louise’s exasperation oozed out. “Youdon’twant to know. Would either of you like some coffee?”
We both accepted coffee. She told us to sit while she fetched our drinks. It took longer than it should have. When she came back, she had changed into a loose set of black sweats. We sipped java for a moment; then I broke the silence.
“If Sarah has a moment, we’d like to talk to her.”
Louise said, “Officer Decker, we already went over everything with Detective MacGregor.”
“I spoke to Detective MacGregor, Louise, and that’s why I’m here. He told me that Sarah didn’t say much about the baby’s father. There is someone else responsible for what happened.”
“I know. I hadn’t wanted to go there.” Louise threw up her hands. “She was supposed to be on the pill.”
“Why was she on the pill? Did Fordham know that she was sexually active?”
“She was under a doctor’s care,” Louise said. “Her gynecologist put her on as a precaution as well as a way to even out her periods. The decision wasn’t haphazard.”
“Of course not,” I concurred. “Listen, Louise, if her sexual activity was voluntary, then the baby’s father is her own business… or at least not police business. But like I said last week, if the activity was forced, that’s another matter.”
She stood up and began to pace. “I’mnotgoing to put her through a rape trial. That’s out of the question!”
“I understand your reluctance. But shouldn’t we at least find out?”
“No, we shouldn’t! Some stones are better left unturned.”
“Maybe she needs therapy-”
“Shehasa therapist. If the topic comes up in therapy, let her deal with it then.”
“Louise,ifthere’s a person out there raping disabled girls like Sarah, I want him behind bars. At least, let her tell meyesorno.”
Louise tried to stare me down. But her eyes told me she had relented. “Give me a few minutes.”
“Take your time.”
She disappeared into the back room.
Dad said, “Good job. You don’t need me.”
“Daddy, I always need you.”
Decker patted my knee. We exchanged shrugs and finished our coffees. When Louise came back, Sarah was holding on to her arm. The girl was dressed in blue pajamas with lambs on them. Louise settled her into a chair. “Do you remember Officer Decker, Sarah?”
The girl nodded. She was round and pink and her yellow hair was tied into a ponytail. I glanced at her hands. Her thumbs were short and stubby. She was looking at her lap.
“Sarah, can I…” I stopped myself, hearing my father’s words of warning. Don’t request to do something if you’re going to do it anyway. “Sarah, I’m going to ask you a few questions. It shouldn’t take long.”
Silence.
Louise said, “Go ahead.”
“Do you know how the baby got in your tummy?”
A nod.
“Can you explain it to me?”
She gave me a blank stare.
Dad broke in. “How do babies get in tummies, Sarah?”
Her eyes darted about the room. “They teached us in school. They showed us pictures.” She spoke haltingly, as if the words came from her diaphragm instead of her throat. Suddenly she giggled and turned red. “They were real”-again she giggled-“real embarrassing.”
“They showed you pictures of boys and girls naked?” I asked her.
“Not real pictures.Drawings.”
“Oh.” I smiled. “It’s good that you know about it… about sex.”
She giggled. “That’s abadword.”
“No, it isn’t,” Louise assured her. “It’s okay, Sarah. That’s what making a baby is. It’s called sex-”
The giggles smothered her words.
“Did you have sex to make your baby, Sarah?” I said.
She turned scarlet and broke into unrestrained laughter. “Yeah, I think I did.”
“Sarah, who did you have sex with?”
She shook her head. “I can’t tell you. I promised.”
Louise said, “Sarah, you must answer their questions-”
“No!” The girl’s face became defiant. “It’s a secret!”
Decker held up his hand to Louise. His demeanor was as casual as a handshake. He smiled at the girl. “Do you have a boyfriend, Sarah?”
Her face darkened. “No.”
“A pretty girl like you-”
“I’m not pretty,” Sarah told him.
“Sure you are,” Decker said. “All that beautiful blond hair. I bet you do have a boyfriend.”
She looked away. Her eyes were downcast.
“What’s wrong, Sarah?Didyou have a boyfriend?”
She nodded slowly.
“What happened? Did he move away or something like that?”
Again with the nod.
Dad gave me the go-ahead to continue the questioning. I tried to follow his line of reasoning. “Was he someone from your school?”
“Yes.”
“Do you know why he moved away?”
“Maybe.” She looked down. “But I can’t tell you. It’s a secret. I can’t tell a secret.”
Louise exhaled loudly, but Decker broke in before she had a chance to reprimand her sister. “Sarah, I’m going to tell you something. Because I think that you’re very smart-”
Her face drew tight. “I’m not smart. I’mretarded.”
“Well, you can be retarded and smart at the same time. So listen carefully, all right?”
Sarah didn’t answer.
Decker said, “In this world, there are good secrets and there are bad secrets. The good secrets are things like… well, when your sister buys you a Christmas present and doesn’t tell you about it even when you ask. Does that ever happen to you?”
She smiled. “Yeah, that’s happened.”