“Baz, no, I’m not accusing you of anything.” Her grimace spoke volumes and again, he felt like he was being a dick. “I know you’d never force yourself on anyone. That’s not— Shit, now I feel like a jerk.”
He shook his head. “Don’t. It’s just a fucked-up situation and it’s my fault. I never should’ve touched her. Hell, she could barely look at me this morning. I guess it’s a good thing I finished the score and won’t be at the office much anymore.”
“You finished the score? That’s great.” Her smile was back in full force. “I know Greg’s been dying to get the film out there for people to see. He wants to set up screenings as soon as possible. Greg said Tru told him you had a panic attack last night. That’s why you left so abruptly. You wanna talk about that? Is that why you kissed Tru?”
“I kissed Tru because I wanted to kiss her. End of story. I mean, she’s the one person besides Nik who can piss me off in seconds flat. Know what I mean? She can look at me, just for a second, and I’ll be ready to rip into her.”
“I’ve noticed that about you two.” She shrugged. “Which is kind of why I’m not really that surprised you kissed her.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Well, fighting’s kind of like flirting, and you guys do an awful lot of fighting. Maybe, for you, the fighting was kind of like foreplay.”
He opened his mouth to tell her she was crazy but shut it before he’d said anything. And thought about it for a second.
“Do you like her?” Sabrina’s quiet question kept him silent for another few seconds.
“I think she’s one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. She’s also one of the most uptight people I know. She’s so damn organized that she gives me hives, for Christ’s sake.” He paused. “And she’s so fucking hot, she makes me want to tear off her clothes and shove her up against a wall.”
Sabrina’s eyes went wide. “Oh.”
He let his lips twist in a sarcastic grin. “Yeah. Oh.”
Then she started to grin and the tight band around his chest started to loosen.
“So what are you going to do about it?”
“Do about what?”
She rolled her eyes and smacked him on the thigh. “What are you going to do about this thing between you and Tru?”
“I don’t think it’s really up to me to do anything about it. I made the first move. I don’t wanna be the dick who keeps hounding her.”
“Okay, I can’t argue with that. So what happened this morning at the office?”
“Not a damn thing.”
Her eyebrows rose. “Really? You didn’t talk at all? Didn’t see each other?”
“Yeah, we saw each other and she told me it was a mistake and it couldn’t happen again.” He sighed. “And then I kissed her and told her it wasn’t a mistake. Then I walked out.”
“So you finished the music after you kissed her last night.”
Wincing, he nodded, knowing exactly where she was going. “That’s not why . . . Shit. Maybe that is why I finished the damn music. I don’t fucking know. All I know is when I kissed her again this morning, she didn’t slap me.”
“Did anything other than kissing happen?”
He didn’t answer, which was really an answer in itself.
“Oh.” Now she really looked shocked and her gaze fell to the drink in her hand.
“Look, nothing happened that she can’t look at herself in the mirror and say it wasn’t a big deal.”
Her gaze bounced up again. “Was it a big deal for you?”
“Besides you, she’s the first girl I’ve kissed in more than a year.”
Eyes narrowed, he watched Sabrina work through that one. “So what are your intentions?”
“I don’t have the first fucking clue.”
Sabrina’s eyes rolled. “That’s bullshit and you know it.”
“It’s not bullshit. That’s the problem. I don’t have a fucking clue. Hell, I’m not sure what the fuck I want. You were the first person to make me realize I still had a dick after my breakdown. And I couldn’t have you. Now I want her and I can’t fucking figure out if that’s because I can’t have you or if it’s all about her.”
Sabrina blushed a very pretty pink that made him grin but not for long. Because he really didn’t know what to do here and it was a weird position for him to be in.
“Baz—”
“I know that makes me sound like a complete and utter fucking dickwad but . . . I think I’m finally ready to move on, and I’m afraid she’s gonna tell me to fuck off.”
Sabrina had been shaking her head for the past few seconds. “You are not a dick. I mean, sure you can act like one, but that’s not who you are. I know that. Greg knows that. And Tru knows that. And if she doesn’t, then she’s not the person I think she is.”
“I don’t know if I’m the person you think I am.”
“Bullshit. Stop that. Of course you are.” She gave him a haughty look. “I’m never wrong.”
Baz laughed, exactly like he was supposed to and looked down at his drink. “So, tell me. What the hell am I supposed to do?”
“Do you really want my advice about a woman?”
“Yeah, I guess I do.”
“Then I’m gonna tell you to stop acting like a pussy and go after what you want.”
“Did you just call me a pussy?”
“You know I did.” She smacked his thigh again. “Suck it up, Baz. Go after what you want.”
The intercom buzzed and Sabrina bounced up to respond, entering the code that allowed her guests to get the elevator to the fourth floor.
Tyler had given Baz one of the prized black keycards that allowed him access to the fourth floor, where Tyler and Jared Golden had their apartments and where Greg and Sabrina also stayed in one of the other two suites.
Baz knew Greg wanted to find a house for himself and Sabrina but he’d been too damn busy to actually look at any yet.
“Jimmy and Brian are here.” Sabrina headed back toward the kitchen but quickly turned and made straight for him. Putting her hands on either side of his face, she smiled directly into his eyes and rubbed her nose against his in an affectionate gesture that made him smile.
“I think she’s crazy if she doesn’t see you for the smart, funny, sometimes-irritating-but-altogether-hot guy you are. Now stop moping and get the fuck up and help me.”
She smacked a quick kiss on his lips and shoved him away, leaving him laughing as he followed her to the kitchen.
When he returned with bowls of chips and pretzels in his hands, Baz saw Jimmy and Brian walk in.
“Hey, apparently this beauty was headed to the same party,” Jimmy laughed. “Imagine that.”
Holding a platter of brownies, Tru’s gaze immediately shot to him, then flashed away to smile at Sabrina, who was directly behind him.
“I’m so glad you came!” Sabrina bounced around him, took the tray out of Tru’s hands, and put it on top of one of the bowls he was carrying, then gave Tru a hug, which she returned with a sweet smile that made him want to drop the bowls and kiss her. Lay a claim to her.
But Jimmy and Brian started to hassle him as Jimmy grabbed one of the bowls Baz had in his hands and they headed for the seating area.
The apartment was big enough to have three couches in a U shape facing a huge-ass television with a state-of-the-art sound system.
Right now, music flowed out of the speakers with some weird psychedelic thing happening on the screen.
“Whoa. That’s kinda freaky.”
Jimmy stopped next to Baz, staring at the swirling patterns, his brain busy trying to make sense of it.
Brian stopped on the other side of Baz, his blond head cocked to the side as he stared as well. “Shit, that’ll give you nightmares.”
Actually, Baz saw music. Not the music Sabrina had playing. That shit was old-school Whitney. Not bad, just not his style. The music in his head was . . . different.
His type of music.
The melody stuck with him the entire night, which turned out to be a couple of hours of shooting the shit about music, movies, politics, and weird crap like Bigfoot, who happened to be the star of the film Sabrina had chosen to watch.