He hadn’t been wrong there. He wasn’t wrong here.
He could fucking have it all.
With a sigh, he pulled out and away, knotting the condom and thinking twice about throwing it in her trash can.
Pulling up his pants, he watched her shimmy back into her panties and fix her skirt.
“Hey, babe?”
Her gaze popped up to his and held.
“Love you.” Then he leaned down to kiss her open mouth. “We’ll talk later. Gotta go make some music.”
He left her staring after him as he made his way to the bathroom to clean up but he couldn’t wipe the grin off his face.
Nik was gonna know exactly what he’d been doing, which made Baz falter for a few steps.
Staring into the mirror over the sink, he looked into his eyes, and for the first time in a long time, he could look at himself and not cringe.
Time to deal with Nik.
He’d left Nik in the studio listening to the music he’d recorded over the past couple of days.
When he walked in, Nik had the headphones on and his eyes closed, foot tapping away on the ground as he leaned back in the chair.
Baz didn’t make any noise but Nik opened his eyes as soon as Baz closed the door.
“You’ve been busy.” Nik pulled off the headphones and watched as Baz slid into the chair next to him. “Really busy.”
“So, what do you think?”
“I think it’s pretty damn good. I guess nearly dying gave you a new lease on life.”
“Pretty much, yeah. You think you can work with it?”
“I can work with anything you give me. You know that.” Nik looked away for a second and when he turned back, his expression had grown more intense. “I just gotta know if you’re back for good or if you’re just back for now. You’ve got all this other stuff on your plate. Stuff I’m guessing your parents are gonna love. Real music and all.”
They laughed at the old joke, at the question Baz’s parents had thrown at him before their last tour.
When are you going to grow up and write real music and stop messing around with your life?
“Our band, our music, this is my life, Nikky. And I fucking love it. But I also love writing scores. I had no idea how much until I started. It feeds another part of my brain, if that makes sense.”
Nik nodded slowly. “Yeah, I get it. Your brain never stops.”
“And that’s how the drugs got so bad. I was using them to stop the other shit in my head from overwhelming me.”
“And now you can do that all on your own?”
“I think having another outlet for the music helps. It’s a challenge, you know.”
“Like her. Like Trudeau.”
He hadn’t thought of it like that but . . . “Kind of. Maybe it started out that way but it’s become more.”
“Like serious more?”
“I love her.”
Nik looked away, shaking his hair out of those eyes women fought each other to stare into while he fucked them.
“So have you told her?”
“Yeah.”
“And does she love you back?”
“I haven’t given her the chance to say it.”
Nik nodded, still not looking at him. “She’s cool. I mean, she’s uptight, but that’s okay because it works for her.”
Yes. Exactly. This is why he and Nik were best friends. They saw things the same way.
Which didn’t explain that kiss.
No. They’d agreed. They weren’t going there.
“She is.”
Nik finally looked up. “And have you talked to her about coming back to the band? What does she think?”
A twinge of something hit him in the chest but he brushed it off. “She knows how important Baseline Sins is to me.”
“So she’s gonna be okay when you head out on tour for months at a time?”
“We’ll talk about it. She’ll have nothing to worry about.”
Nik’s smile was bittersweet and Baz had no idea what he was thinking. “Always the optimist.”
“No. I don’t know. Maybe. I just know how I feel about her.”
Nik nodded.
“So, we gonna call the guys or we just gonna let ’em twist?”
Baz smiled. “Let’s get the band back together.”
Chapter Twelve
“Hey, Tru, baby. How goes it?”
A smile already curving on her lips, Tru looked up at the bear of a man standing in the doorway to her office.
Zach Sheidy had the smile of an angel, if angels came with size-fourteen feet, stood at least three inches over six feet, and weighed in at 220 pounds of pure, bulging muscle.
“Good morning, Zach. You’re early today.”
“Didn’t get done recording last night. Practically fell asleep on my kit but I hate leaving shit unfinished so I figured I’d get in here before anyone else.”
He must’ve been able to tell from her expression that he wouldn’t be the only one in the studio.
“Let me guess.” He shook his head. “Baz.”
“Got it in one.”
Zach shook his head, auburn waves swaying. “The guy’s fucking relentless when he’s got his mind set on something. Thanks for the heads up, babe.”
“No problem.”
His gaze narrowed. “Everything okay?”
She wanted to be able to smile and say, “Yep,” but the past three weeks Baseline Sins had been working here had been . . . eye opening. In so many ways.
So she lied and said, “Sure.”
Which Zach didn’t buy for a minute. He walked into her office and sat on the chair in front of her desk. The chair gave a slight creak but held. “Bullshit. What’d he do? I’ll go smack him down for you.”
Shaking her head, she smiled, and this time, it was totally genuine.
For the past two weeks, the men of Baseline Sins had become constant fixtures in her office. Zach always stopped on his way in to say hello. The guy lived up to his nickname of Zachy Bear, because he was just a big teddy bear, sweet natured and quiet, so different from the four other men of Baseline Sins.
“He didn’t do anything.”
And that was the problem. They hadn’t had time to do anything. He didn’t ignore her. He just wasn’t . . . there.
And she missed him. It felt like a hole in her gut, it sucked so bad.
“Ah.” Zach’s mouth twisted in a grimace. “He can get pretty damn focused when he’s making music.”
“Yes, he can. And don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining. Not at all. He’s just not . . . here.”
“But the sex is still off the charts, yeah?”
She sighed and shook her head but, truthfully, she’d become used to the lack of a filter displayed by all of the guys. If it crossed their minds, it usually came out of their mouths.
“Yeah, it is.”
Hell, it was better, if that was even possible. When they had sex. But those times had become few and far between these past few weeks.
With a quick glance over his shoulder, Zach leaned forward and when he spoke, his voice dropped to almost a whisper.
“You’re good for him. Don’t let him scare you away.”
Her lips curved in a smile that Zach returned, which made her want to sigh. The guy was built like Dwayne Johnson but when he smiled, he had the charm of Colin Firth. And that was no mean feat in her book.
But when Sebastian smiled at her . . .
Her smile fell away. Because when Sebastian smiled at her, she knew she was going to be broken-hearted when he left. And he would leave. Probably sooner rather than later.
She’d started to steel herself against it and had begun to retreat. Not that Sebastian had noticed. Which meant she was a better actress than she’d thought.