It looked as though my tears were going to stay away, and now that I was indoors, in familiar territory, I allowed myself to feel a little braver. "Why are you being so nice to me again?"
He frowned. "Why wouldn't I be nice to you?"
"Because…because…I wasn't very nice to you the last time we talked. Even after you gave me the book."
He made a noise in his throat, almost like a laugh, but not quite. "You weren't yourself, not after all those drinks. It's fine."
"I don't know," I said contrarily, "maybe I was myself."
He shook his head. "It wouldn't matter. Now tell me, what happened out there?"
The warmth in his voice, the concern…it was tearing me apart. There was something so familiar and safe about him that I longed for right now, and I couldn't evade him.
"It's…complicated," I said at last.
"Immortal intrigue?"
I nodded, feeling tears well in my eyes again. Fuck. I think half of my emotion now was from the way he was looking at me and had nothing to do with the rest of my life's madness. I stood up and looked away, hoping he wouldn't see my face, but it was no use.
"Georgina, what's happened? You're scaring me."
I dared a glance back. "You…you wouldn't believe me if I told you."
His face was still filled with worry, but the hint of a smile turned up the edges of his lips. "Can you seriously believe that after half the stuff I've seen you go through? Try me."
"Fair enough," I admitted. "But I don't want to get you involved."
"I want to help," he said, moving closer. His voice was like velvet, wrapping me up in softness and security. "Please. Tell me what's going on."
I wanted to tell him there was nothing he could do, but suddenly, words spilled from my lips.
"Jerome got summoned-which means he's trapped somewhere and-"
"Whoa, wait. Summoned? Like in Dr. Faustus ?"
"Um, yeah. And so long as he's gone, we're all in this weird state. Peter calls it 'stasis.' None of us have our pow-abilities anymore. I can't shape-shift. Hugh can't see souls. The only ones who are happy about this are the vampires because they can go in the sun again, which'll probably end up killing them. And if we don't find Jerome soon, someone else is going to take over here, and I really don't want that. And yet…I really don't want to go another second like this either, being in this limbo. I want everything to go back to how it was."
Seth's face was unreadable as he regarded me for several heavy seconds. Finally, he said, "Is it…is it so bad going without shape-shifting?"
I shook my head and began to ramble further. "It's not that. It's the fact that I may not be immortal anymore. I can't…I can't handle that. Coming here was horrible. The walk from my apartment. I'm afraid of everything. It's stupid. I mean, you guys-humans-get by all the time and don't think about it. But I'm scared to leave the house. Scared of what could happen to me. And when that car didn't see me right away-fuck. I just froze. I was paralyzed. God, I feel like an idiot. I must sound crazy."
At long last, a tear leaked out of the corner of one eye, the final stamp on my weakness. Seth reached out and gently wiped it away. He didn't withdraw his hand when finished, though. He slid it to my shoulder and pulled me to him. I rested my head on his chest, swallowing back more tears as I sank into the protection he offered.
"Georgina, Georgina," he murmured, running his hand over my back. "It's going to be okay. Everything's going to be okay."
Those words…there was something so wonderful about them, simple as they were. When people are distressed, others have an instinct to want to actually do something tangible to help-men in particular. And there's nothing wrong with that-often, it's very much desired. But what a lot of people don't get is that sometimes, all that's needed is to hear those words: Everything's going to be okay . It's enough to know that someone's there, that someone cares about you. It isn't always about the next logical course of action.
My next words, spoken into his Hong Kong Phooey shirt, came out muffled. "I don't know what's going to happen. With any of this. I'm so scared. I don't think I've been this afraid since I thought Roman was going to kill me."
"Nothing will happen to you. You said yourself this won't last more than a few days. Just wait it out."
"I don't wait very well."
He laughed and leaned his cheek against my forehead. "I know you don't. Don't worry. Most of us do far more dangerous things than walk two blocks, and we survive just fine. Yeah, that car kind of sucked, but even still, nothing happened."
"It's two and a half blocks," I corrected. "Not two."
"Right. I forgot that extra half one where the sharks and land mines are."
I pulled away slightly so that I could look into his face. His arms stayed around me. "I have to find Jerome, Seth."
His smile faded. The worry returned. "Georgina…if you want to stay safe, going after him probably isn't the way to do it. You don't always have to take this stuff on yourself, you know. Let someone else look for him. Stay home."
"That's the thing…I'm not sure anyone will be looking for him. Why would the other demons want him back? They want his territory. They aren't going to be happy if he's found."
Seth sighed. "Great. Now I'm the one worried about you leaving the house."
"Hey, I thought you said everything was going to be okay?"
"Gotta be careful what I say." Eyes thoughtful, he reached up and smoothed some hair on the side of my head. "Why are you so brave?"
I scoffed. "Are you insane? Didn't you just witness my near breakdown?"
"No," he said gently. "That's the thing. You are scared. You don't know what's going on or what could happen to you. Yet, in spite of that fear and uncertainty, you're going to throw yourself out there to hunt him down. No one else would do that, and you do that kind of thing all the time."
Inexplicably, I flushed under his praise. "I was only going to do a Web search."
"You know what I mean. I think you've got more courage than anyone I know-and what's truly amazing is that it's so subtle, hardly anyone ever notices. You do so much, and it goes unseen. I wish I was that brave sometimes."
"You are," I said, growing increasingly unsettled by our proximity. I also noticed then that he was still smoothing my hair back. "What are you doing to my hair? Does it look bad or something?"
"Your hair never looks bad." He dropped his hand sheepishly. "It's just…a little messier than usual."
"I brushed it fifteen minutes ago!"
Seth shrugged. "I don't know. It's just kind of frizzy, but that's probably normal. There's a little humidity out."
"Frizzy? My hair's never frizzy."
"Georgina," he said wearily. "Considering everything else going on, I don't think you need to worry about your hair being frizzy."
"Yeah, yeah. You're right." I made a face. "I just feel like I got a raw deal here. The vampires are having a non-stop party. Me? I somehow get bad hair. Not sure the energy break is really worth it."
Seth tilted his head, face puzzled once more. "Energy break?"
"Yeah. Along with everything else, I lost the need for life energy, so I'm not-"
I stopped. The world stopped.
I met Seth's eyes, those beautiful golden-brown eyes that were filled with utter and complete shock as we both realized the full weight of what I had been about to say. His hold on me stiffened. The casual embrace suddenly became so much more. I was acutely aware of every place we were touching and exactly how much distance was between the places we weren't touching. He felt warm, so wonderfully warm, and every place he touched me tingled-not necessarily in a sexual way but in a Oh my God, it's Seth way. My entire body was on full alert, waiting and watching-and hoping-for him to touch me more.