Even above the deafening music that followed, I could hear Gabrielle shrieking, “Oh my God!” Her face was ecstatic, and when Cody said something to her, she lit up further and nodded eagerly at the band. My guess was—whether it was true or not—he was reaffirming how awesome they were.
The music forced Seth and me to lean close in order to talk. “You know,” he said, “I’m pretty sure the bass player stuffed his bra.”
“Nah,” I teased back. “It’s a push-up bra, so it just seems that way. They do amazing things for cleavage.”
All things considered, Blue Satin Bra wasn’t that bad. Metal might not be my favorite music, but I was still open to a lot of types. The setting and craziness that ensued throughout the night gave Seth and me lots of material to joke over. We were both in really good moods when the show finally ended and we walked out with Gabrielle and Cody.
“That was awesome,” she exclaimed. “Thank you so much for sharing the tickets.”
“No problem,” I said. My ears were ringing, and I wasn’t sure if I was still shouting.
“I think that was the best show I’ve ever seen,” said Cody nobly.
Gabrielle clutched his sleeve, and his eyes widened. “I know! Which was your favorite song?”
Silence.
“Mine was that one were they kept saying ‘My Armageddon scales will burn your post office,’” said Seth deadpan.
“Oh, yeah. That’s one of their greatest,” she said. “It’s called ‘Plywood Fuck.’”
“That’s my favorite too,” said Cody. I somehow doubted he’d heard any of the music tonight. His senses were all on Gabrielle.
Perfectly in sync, Seth and I glanced at each other and exchanged secret smiles, both of us amused at Cody’s love. I wasn’t as far gone as he was, but when our group finally split up, I found myself walking on air too.
“Interesting night,” Roman told me when we got home. He’d been along in spy mode. “I think Cody might actually have a chance.”
“Maybe,” I said. “He’s clearly smitten, but she only seems mildly interested. In a friendly way, though.”
Roman rummaged through the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of Lucky Charms. “He’s not the only one who’s smitten.”
I sighed and collapsed onto the couch. “Let it go, okay? We all know I’m a long ways from getting over Seth.”
Roman gave me a sly look. “I wasn’t talking about you.”
I stared at him for a moment, my vodka-addled brain trying to make sense of his words. “Wait…you’re talking about Seth? He’s over me.”
“Oh my God, Georgina. Could you be any more delusional?”
“He’s getting married.”
“That means nothing. If it did, guys wouldn’t catch chlamydia at their bachelor parties.”
“But he does love Maddie. And no matter what you think about his feelings, he’ll be out of my reach once they’re married.”
“The fact that they’re dating means he should already be out of your reach—but past evidence shows that’s not true.”
I scowled and kicked off my shoes. “Don’t bring that up. I feel bad enough—and so does he. If you’re just going to taunt me, then I’m going to bed.”
But to my surprise, Roman didn’t wear that mocking look that had become so typical for him since returning to Seattle. His eyes were serious, his expression—almost—concerned. “I’m not trying to taunt you. I’m just stating the facts. No matter what happens, you and Seth can’t seem to stay away from each other. You should put in a transfer request.”
“What, out of Seattle?” I asked incredulously. “I love it here.”
“You’ll learn to love some other place. Honestly, it’s the only way you’re going to be able to move on—the only way either of you can move on. You’re in a situation where you see him every day—tonight being a prime example. He broke up with you, and then you broke up with him for some ‘greater good’ kind of goal. But if you keep hanging around each other, it won’t matter. You’ll never heal. You’re just going to get your heart ripped out every day.”
I was so stunned that I couldn’t even respond for several seconds. The old taunt danced in my head: circles and circles. “I…why do you say that? Why do you care?”
“Because I already see it happening every day. You are getting your heart ripped out over and over, and it kills me to watch it happen.”
Again, I fell speechless for a moment. “I thought…I thought you hated me. I thought you wanted to destroy me.”
He finished his cereal and set the bowl down. I didn’t have the will to shoo the cats away. “I don’t hate you, Georgina,” he said wearily. “Am I upset about what happened to Helena? Absolutely. Am I upset about you lying about loving me? Yes. Do I want some kind of revenge? Maybe. Honestly, my feelings change from day to day. Some days I do want something awful to happen to you. Some days…well, I know you did what you did out of some misguided sense of…I don’t know. You thought you were doing the right thing.”
I wanted to tell him that I had loved him, in a way. But that probably wouldn’t be useful right now. “Well, watching this Seth drama unfold is probably giving you lots of material when it comes to something awful happening to me.”
“No,” he said, with a weary head shake. “I don’t like this. Like I said, I’d rather see you leave and start a new life. Every time I see you now, it’s like…it’s like watching you die. Over and over.”
I stood up, suddenly wanting to sleep. “Yeah,” I said softly. “That’s kind of what it feels like.” I hesitated. “Thanks for listening. And understanding.”
“Anytime,” he said.
This also caught me by surprise. Somewhere in these last few crazy months, I realized, Roman and I had become friends again. “I hate to ask you this, but, well, I’m not doing a very good job with keeping an upbeat mood tonight. Would you—”
He rose as well. “Yup. I’ll watch you sleep. If you can handle the creepy factor.”
“It’s an acceptable trade,” I said with a smile. “Thanks.”
And maybe it was the vodka, but I stepped forward and hugged him. He was stiff for a moment, clearly caught off guard, but then he relaxed and wrapped his arms around me. I rested my head against his chest, taking small comfort in someone warm and alive who wasn’t a stranger. He smelled like I remembered, the clean, sharp scent of his cologne surrounding me in a way very different from Seth’s woodsy smell.
I was just thinking I should pull away when a voice asked, “Am I interrupting anything?”
I jerked away from the embrace and found Carter standing in the living room, arms crossed and one eyebrow arched. Roman seemed equally flustered and took a few steps back as well, getting as far away from me as he could.
“Don’t you ever knock?” I asked.
“Not sure you’d answer,” said Carter good-naturedly. “Especially with the news I’ve got.”
I groaned. “That was fast. Does it have to do with Simone?”
He nodded. “Afraid so. She met up with Seth again.”
Chapter 9
“She couldn’t have!” I exclaimed. “He was with me all night.”
“Not after the concert ended,” pointed out Roman. “You know, I think that band might really be going somewhere.” Whatever trace of sentiment he’d shown earlier with me had vanished in Carter’s presence.
“Simone was hanging out in that twenty-four-hour coffee shop,” Carter said. “Seth went there to work after—what was it you said? You were at a concert?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Blue Satin Bra.”
The angel gave Roman a nod of agreement. “Those guys are great.”
“Hey, can we stick to the issue here?” I gave both of them glares. “What happened with Seth and Simone?”
Carter shrugged. “Same as usual. He came in and noticed her first, though. She had her head in a book—didn’t even look up until he walked over.”