Suckers

Duncan was staring at me with a tired look on his face. I wished he would sit down. He was making me uncomfortable.

'I never asked for much,' I said.

'Tell you what,' he said, brightening. 'I've got a better idea. Instead of Paris, why don't you go down with Jack and Alicia tomorrow, and I'll join you at the weekend.'

'Go down? What d'you mean? Go down where?'

'Dorset.'

The whisky glass slipped through my fingers and cracked into two neat halves on the carpet.

'Oh, well done,' said Duncan.

'Dorset? With Jack and Alicia?' I couldn't help giggling. 'That's a great idea, Duncan. I can't imagine why I didn't think of it. Dorset!' I couldn't stop giggling, even when I tried.

'What's so funny?'

'Nothing,' I said, taking deep hiccuping breaths. 'Nothing at all.' But there must have been something in my face, because he was looking at me warily. I said casually, 'I don't suppose you've seen Jack?'

He stooped to retrieve the two halves of glass. 'Yeah, I was over there earlier.'

I chose my words carefully. 'Then I suppose you saw Alicia? And the baby?'

'I said I went over, didn't I?'

'How were they?'

'Not so hot.' He walked over to deposit the broken glass in the waste-paper basket. 'There's some bug going round, and they've both gone down with it. Jack wants to take them down to the country as soon as possible. He reckons it's traffic fumes. Everyone's coming down with bronchitis.'

'Bronchitis?' I tried to act naturally, but ended up with the giggles again.

He was losing patience. 'What's the hell's wrong with you?'

I tried like mad to keep a straight face. 'I made a mistake. I thought Jack was one of them. Alicia, too.'

'Jack? Nah, he's way too smart. You know Jack.'

I didn't want to talk about Jack and Alicia any more. I grabbed at the first thing that came into my head. 'But Dorset? You've got to be kidding. What the fuck am I supposed to do in Dorset? You don't want to go to Dorset, do you? Not really. You've got better things to do than go there. You've got lots of work to do.'

He was playing with the remote control, even though the set was off. 'I hadn't made up my mind. I wanted to hear what you…'

'Duncan, can I ask you something?'

'Feel free, ask away.' He wasn't even looking in my direction.

'How long have you been lying to me?'

I wasn't sure that he'd heard. He sat down on the sofa, making sure there was a fair amount of space between us, and placed the remote control on the coffee-table. Then he folded his arms, and looked straight at me. 'I've never lied to you, Dora. What makes you think that?'

'Oh, maybe not technically, like in a court of law. But you've been deceiving me, haven't you? Violet's been coming here, hasn't she? For the last couple of days? Come on, let's have a look at your neck.'

I leant over and tried to pick at one corner of the sticking-plaster, but he pulled back, out of reach, laughing nervously, and said, 'Don't be stupid.'

'Come on, show me.'

'No, I…'

'Show me.'

He sighed and peeled back one edge of the plaster. Saturday night's blisters had burst once already, and they were ready to burst again. 'There,' he said. 'Satisfied?'

'Not quite.' Before he had time to retreat, I lunged at the dressing and ripped it all the way off. He slapped his hand over the exposed skin, but not before I'd glimpsed the other bite: two very small, very neat puncture wounds, just below the blisters.

'That was Lulu,' he said.

'That's not Lulu. That's fresh.' I was trying to be angry with him, but all of a sudden there was a lump in my throat. 'Ruth was right. You're one of them. Or you will be — because it's not over, is it? How many more sessions? Two? Or three? That's why you won't come to Paris. That's why you want me out of the way.'

'You don't know what you're talking about.' But he was unable to suppress a faintly supercilious smile.

It was all coming apart. There was no longer any point pretending it wasn't. 'Oh, but I do know. I wish I didn't.' I tried to keep my voice steady, but couldn't stop it quavering. 'She's giving you the works, isn't she? You're getting the VIP treatment. Not like all those one-bite wonders roaming the streets. You're right up there — right up at the top of the Chinese Whisper chain.'

'Dora, you're hysterical.'

'I'm not hysterical!' I screamed. 'I'm just fucking angry!' It all seemed so obvious now. 'How old are you now? That's what she was waiting for. She wanted you the same age as she used to be. The same age as your mother.'

'My mother's dead. Don't you dare bring her into this.'

'I didn't bring her in — she was already there!'

He made a last-ditch attempt at mollification, but his heart wasn't in it. 'Look,' he said. 'I'm sorry. I never meant any of this to happen.'

I laid into him. 'Like hell you didn't. You've been making a complete fool out of me, all this time, and there I was, thinking….'

He shrugged. 'I can't help it if you got the wrong end of the stick.'

'I got the short end of the stick,' I said, holding up my little finger. 'As usual.'

'Look, I was going to tell you, eventually. I just didn't want you finding out this way. I didn't want you getting hurt.'

I'd heard that one before. He was so full of shit, I couldn't understand why I hadn't smelled it. 'So tell me,' I sneered. 'What happened thirteen years ago? What was I supposed to be? Some sort of appetiser? Except you went and blew your top, just like you're always blowing it. Is that what happened? Things got a little rough, did they? Things got a little out of hand?'

'You don't know anything. She made me do it.'

'Don't talk crap!' I shouted. 'You set me up.'

He shook his head. 'She set me up. She said it wouldn't work, and I didn't believe her. But she was right. She wanted me to see for myself. Staking, decapitation, dismemberment — none of it worked. And nothing will work. Nothing will ever work again. Just like nothing will work with me.'

'Oh, so it's a fait accompli? You're one of them already?'

'I'm not even half-way there. This is not like a one-night stand, Dora, this is the real thing. We're going to be together for ever.'

I wanted nothing better than to wipe that smug look off his face. 'So what are you going to do now, Duncan? Bite me? Get a foretaste of things to come? Go on, admit it. I was on the menu all along, wasn't I?'

'Bite you?' A faint look of distaste crossed his face. 'Bite you? No, I would never do that. You must understand it was nothing personal, Dora. None of it had anything to do with you. You just happened to be there.'

I couldn't sit still. I found myself holding the gun, fiddling with the safety catch, turning it this way and that, though I couldn't actually remember taking it out of my bag.

'So all that other stuff didn't work,' I said. 'But there was one thing we didn't try. We didn't try this. It was something we didn't know about.'

He glanced at the gun and dismissed it instantly, shaking his head again. 'No way. You know that's useless.'

'But silver bullets.'