"Feeling displaced?"
"I'm afraid so."
"Easy thing to feel," I said. "If she'd been the sole object of your father's affection for what, ten, fifteen years?"
"Eighteen."
"Then she is suddenly faced with competition at the precise moment when she is least able to compete."
"Because she's tired most of the time," Susan said. "Stuck home with the baby, and Papa comes home after a pleasant day at the drug store, plays with the baby for an hour and says `ain't it great.' "
"And your mother feels like there's something unwomanly about her because she doesn't think it's so great."
"In fact, she resents the baby," Susan said.
"Which makes her feel worse, which makes her resent the baby more."
"My God," Susan said, "I'm naked in bed with a sensitive male."
"Man of the nineties," I said.
"No matter how often," Susan said, "it is always surprising that you know the things you know."
"You hang around," I said, "you learn."
"Depends on who you hang around with," Susan said.
"I spend a lot of my life with people in trouble," I said. "I think some of them would have been in trouble if they'd been brought up by Mother Teresa, but a lot of them come from homes where the family didn't work right for them."
"We meet the same kinds of people, don't we."
"Except the kind you meet have managed to get themselves to a shrink."
"Unless they are a shrink," Susan said.
"Then they give themselves a referral," I said.
We were quiet. Enough snow had collected on Marlborough Street to reflect the street lights, and the darkness outside my bedroom window had become somewhat paler. Susan still had her hand flat over the pale scars on my chest.
Susan said, "We're skating very carefully on the surface here, aren't we."
"Yes."
"That's because we're on very thin ice."
"I know."
"It's not like you to be so oblique," she said.
"It's not like us to be on thin ice," I said.
"I… I'll get past this," Susan said.
"I know."
"But you'll have to bear with me," she said. "Right now this is the best I can do."
"I'll bear with you," I said, "until hell freezes over."
"There would be some really thin ice," Susan said.
She took her hand off my scars and put it against my face and raised up and kissed me hard. Hell could freeze solid if it wanted to.
chapter seven
I PICKED RITA Fiore up at Cone, Oakes and Baldwin, where she was their senior litigator, and took her to lunch at the Ritz Cafe. The maitre d' got her a table by the window and let me sit there too.
"Is this a three-martini lunch?" Rita said.
"If you can control yourself," I said.
"I have always controlled myself," Rita said. "Except maybe with that Assistant DA when I was in Norfolk County."
We each ordered a martini. I had one made with vodka, on the rocks, with a twist. Rita was a classicist. She had it straight up with gin and olives. Outside our window on Newbury Street the snow that had fallen last night had melted except in corners where there was always shade. Rita drank her first drink and held it in her mouth for a minute and closed her eyes. Then she swallowed.
"Good," Rita said. "What do you need?"
"Maybe I've missed you," I said.
"Yeah, and maybe you're going to guzzle down two martinis and come on to me."
"In the Ritz Cafe?" I said.
"Of course not," Rita said. "So what do you want?"
"Francis Ronan," I said.
Rita paused with her glass halfway to her lips. She leaned back in her chair and looked at me.
"You're not going to law school."
"No."
She kept looking at me. Then, as if she finally realized that she was holding it, she raised her martini glass and took another swallow and put the glass down.
"Working for or against?" she said.
"Probably against," I said.
"That figures," Rita said.
"Why does that figure?" I said.
"Sir Lancelot asks you about a dragon, you don't figure they're working together."
"I'm Sir Lancelot?"
"You think you are."
"Which makes Francis Ronan a dragon."
"Not so loud," Rita said.
"He has people everywhere?" I said.
"He knows a lot of people and some of them are the kind that have lunch here."
"Like us," I said.
"No," Rita said. "Not like us."
"So, tell me about him?"
"First, none of this is for attribution," Rita said.
She had lowered her voice, though I don't think she realized it.
"What am I, Newsweek?" I said.
"I mean it. You'll have to promise me that you will not tell anyone that I talked to you about Francis Ronan."
"You sound scared, Rita."
"I am."
"I didn't think you were scared of anything."
"I'm scared of him," Rita said. "You should be too."
"Me? Sir Lancelot?"
"You promise or no?" Rita said.
"I promise."
"Okay. I'll tell you everything I know about him. But first some free advice."
"Free?" I said.
"You sure you're a lawyer?"
"Stay away from Francis Ronan. You have a case that brings you into conflict with him, get off the case."
"Thank you," I said.
"For what?"
"For the advice."
"You going to take it?"
"No."
"I didn't imagine you would," she said. "But it was serious advice. What do you want to know."
"Everything you can tell me," I said.
Rita leaned forward and spoke so softly that I had to lean forward too.
"He is a legendary lawyer," Rita said. "You know that. He is the finest criminal defense lawyer I have ever seen. He's so smart, he's so… what is he… he's so… he wants so badly to win that he commits everything to every defense. Nothing else matters to him as much as getting his client acquitted. He will do anything to win. And he's that way regardless of the merit of his client's case, or, for that matter, the merit of the client."
"He's represented some very bad people," I said.
"The worst, and he's won for them. And the best, and he's won for them."
"And it's made him rich."
Rita finished her martini and ordered another one. I was still dawdling with mine. Martinis make me sleepy. Consumed at lunch they tend to blow my day, as is true at breakfast.
"Yes. Actually, I think he was always rich. I think his family had money. But he has certainly enlarged his net worth over the years."
"And he was a judge," I said.
"Yes. Interestingly, he was not a terribly good judge. He is not judicious. He is not a great legal mind. He is a great litigator. But his judicial rulings were frequently reversed on appeal. He hadn't the patience, or, I guess, the sense of fairness, of"-again Rita looked for a word-"of decency," she said, "that makes a good judge."
"How'd he feel about being overruled?"
"It is said to have driven him mad," Rita said. "Have you met him?"
"Yes."
"Has he an ego?"
"A lot bigger than he is," I said.
"It's what made him so good as a litigator. The ego. He needed to win."
Rita had picked up the menu and looked at it as she talked. Now she paused to read it.
"Lobster sandwich looks good," she said.
"You going to have it?" I said.
"Oh, God no," she said. "With these hips, what are you crazy?"
"Those are elegant hips," I said.
Rita snorted and put down the menu.
"I'll have the green salad," she told the waiter, "dressing on the side."
I ordered the lobster sandwich.
"You're doing that to be mean," Rita said.
"I like lobster sandwiches. What's Ronan doing at Taft?"
"Ego. He may be the greatest criminal lawyer in the world. But criminal lawyers tend to represent criminals. And some of the dirt maybe rubs off. I think he took the professorship at Taft because it was prestigious."
"Does he actually teach," I said.
Rita shrugged.
"Taft's trying to build the law school. One way to do that is to attract a superstar. As you know, one of the prime perks of any teaching job is not to teach. Ronan is a superstar. My guess is that he probably lectures once a week. I think he would enjoy lecturing."