I tried like hell not to swirl my hips into his fingers, but I’m not sure if I succeeded or not. I whimpered my reply when Paxton pinched my clit and twisted, back and forth. My body trembled beneath his hand and I braced for relief. Relief that never came. Paxton glided his fingers through my slit again. Slowly. Up and down and then up my body.
He pushed his index finger into my mouth and I let him, tasting my arousal on my tongue. “You’re not coming. I don’t know if you’ll ever come again. Not until I find out where you were and why you were so far from home.”
I tried to talk again, but he shushed me with a whispered shhh, and stalked away. My first thought was to spout off something smart again. Something about not needing him to take care of that for me, that I was perfectly capable myself. Only I wasn’t. Paxton didn’t walk out the door. He sauntered to the armoire in the corner and unlocked the first drawer.
I still didn’t speak. I don’t think I could. I think I was in shock. The top part of the contraption consisted of a soft cloth linked together like a chain. The middle part was leather, and the section that would slide up my ass was made from real chain. Metal.
Oh, hell no.
“You’re not putting that thing on me,” I professed with a tone meant to assure him I wasn’t about to surrender for that one. No way in hell.
“Shhh. You need to remember how this all works. I make the rules. I do the talking. Not you,” he said with more assurance than my voice had projected. “Stop talking.”
I laid there perfectly still while my husband covered me in some sort of modern-day chastity belt.
Paxton lifted my good leg a little and I moved my hip to help slide the device under my ass. It was either help, or deal with the pain of him doing it. I knew better which way I could move. He tugged, slowly pulling the cool metal between my ass cheeks.
He split me open with two fingers and kissed my ache. The sudden suction between his lips was almost enough. He sucked, moving his head up and down while I fell into a trance that there was no coming back from. I knew he wasn’t about to let me come. Maybe that’s what thrilled me. Whatever it was, finding that bliss suddenly became the only thing on earth I cared about.
Paxton stopped with one long suck over my clit and a pop. My body tensed instead of relaxing. I hungered like an animal, and I needed more. One more kiss to my overzealous nub, and that was it. It was be over. The thick, but soft leather went between my legs, and I heard a click and then a dial.
“You can move around just fine. It’s made for sleeping. If you need to pee, you’ll tell me through the intercom. It’s always on. Night, Love. Sleep well,” he added as his lips met mine.
Something was happening. Something I didn’t under-stand. My mind reeled at the thought of sleeping with a chastity belt. My va-ja-ja revved up, and my chest tingled in a weird way, like glitter mixed with fire-crackers.
Surprisingly, for as much as I had going on, I slept. I’m sure that had more to do with the pain medication than anything else. I knew that without them, my mind would have been on a roller coaster all night. I don’t even remember dozing off. I went out cold.
Chapter Five
“Mom, Izzy said we wasn’t going to get a nice house. She said we would just live with someone again. Will we, Mom?” I asked from the front seat. I was little. Very little. Maybe Ophelia’s age.
“You bigmouth! I didn’t want you to tell her that,” Izzy complained from the backseat, kicking me from behind. Wait. Kicking who? I was in the front seat. Or was I in the backseat?
“Why did you say that, Izabella?” my mom asked, glancing over her shoulder, shooting Izzy a glare.
“Well, you always say that, but we don’t never do it,” I said while speaking the truth. Everything was so familiar yet so fuzzy. Safe. I felt safe. Safer than I had ever felt in my life. I think…
“Could we live like this if we had a house to take care of? Do you really want to stay locked in the same house, year after year?” Mom winked and the brightest smile ever lit up her face. She showed white teeth shining bright behind red lips. That meant I was right. We wouldn’t have our own house.
I could see my young mother as if I was right there. Like I could reach out and touch her pretty face. Her hair curled just like mine and Izzy’s at the ends. Wait. Izzy? Real life mixed with another realm while I slept, resting in some sort of hallucination. It was real, yet it wasn’t.
“Well, we could get us a swing set,” I said again from the front seat.
Izabella’s tone broke the banter between my mom and me. “Look at all the flowers,” she quietly spoke just above a whisper. An angel’s voice. The debate going on between my mom and I about a house with twin beds and a swing set was over with her soft words.
I stared out the window. All the gold flowers looked like a blanket covering the desert. Thousands of them, maybe even a million gazillion. There were more colors than my entire crayon box. I was in total awe. We all were.
“Let’s go girls,” my mom said in her fun voice. That meant adventure. We were going to do something fun. Something we’d learned as we’d aged, usually meant breaking the law.
Gabby and I jumped out of the car and ran right behind our mom, arms gliding us gracefully through the air like eagles, flying high on life. The scent of yellow and orange filled our nostrils as we skipped through sunshine.
“Lay down. We have to lay down,” my mom insisted. Of course, Gabby and I did it. Hand in hand, we laid on a flowerbed. The sky was bright with shades of summer blue and milky, white clouds. Light and fluffy ones. A soft breeze blew the scent of flowers across our noses. I could see mine and Izzy’s little noses scrunched. They smelled like fish. Not fragrant-scented flowers at all. No pretty lavender or rose smell at all. My mom didn’t even notice. She was off in that state where you just know there’s something more, probably thinking that we weren’t put on this earth for nothing. This was all just a test for what was to come. My mother had preached that to us for as long as I could remember.
“What do you see, Clyde’s?”
“I see a pony,” I said. I knew that wasn’t what she meant as soon as I said it.
My hand was squeezed with a silent understanding and I heard a sigh. Izzy went next, telling my mother exactly what she wanted to hear.
“I see a whole world,” she said in awe, gazing past the floating pony, witnessing something magical. Something mammoth, something bigger than her. Something my mom saw, too.
“That’s right, baby. There’s a whole world out there. Don’t ever forget that. You hear that, Gabriella? You don’t ever let someone hold you back. You have to stand up for yourself. You hear me?”
My mom was always saying stuff like that to me. I wasn’t like Izzy. Not on the inside. I was easy prey. Even the kids on the playground took advantage of me, bulling me from a swing, or telling me to get off the slide. I always listened, while Izzy punched them in the nose. I was always the quiet one, the one who followed suit, doing what others told me to do.