It is too bad Harry makes it sound as bad for himself as he does, or maybe he doesn’t in the other letters. He talks about being “finished” with me and St Ben’s; that is, he thinks his decision not to buy will finish him. That is silly. But just goes to show you how utterly normal supposedly enlightened people can be. I hope Sr Mariella will be able to cool him off and save his self-esteem. It will not be easy, considering the way he’s got things twisted around. […] Harry says: “Neither you nor Sister Mariella have a so-called business sense, and you are even proud of the lack; I wish I could afford to be without one.” Hmmmmm. How does one get a business sense? I think it is nine-tenths talking dull and acting as though you have one. Do you have a business sense? I wonder if he means I don’t write stories for Collier’s. Suppose I sold a story there. What would he think then? I do not think he’d like it. […]
Best to all and love to you.
Jim
BETTY WAHL
St Joseph’s Hospital
St Paul, Minnesota
Friday morning, 3:00 a.m., December 28, 1945
Dear Betty,
[…] I’ve been thinking we ought to go to Ireland as soon as we can when married. I am beginning to wonder if we can afford to settle down. Every time I think of the Humphreys, I feel rotten. I still haven’t got Fr Garrelts yet, so suppose they are blissfully ignorant that they’re out in the cold again. Confidentially, I do not want to see too much of the Sylvesters, after this. It must be very convenient to be able to assess one’s dreams — for I assume that’s what living at St Joe was for them, the prospect — at so many hundred dollars and if they come too high to abandon them. I’ll be at the station to meet you Sunday. I love you, as ever.
Jim
Sister Mariella came up with a house for the Humphreys, one owned by the Benedictines.
BETTY WAHL
150 Summit Avenue
January 13, 1946
[…] Sunday, 3 in the afternoon
Dear Betty,
It is that time. I’m just up. I went to 5 o’clock Mass (and Communion) this morning. That was because I had a helluva lot more stuff to sterilize than ordinarily on Saturday night. If it is like that next week, I’m afraid I won’t be in such fine fettle for the party. As it was, I think, I was tottering on the edge of the state of grace. I won’t go into it all. Only say I pray God I’ll never forget these years and that if I’m ever asked to say a few words, anywhere, I’ll remember the people who scrubbed the banquet hall, who will wash the dishes, and who will hope those present will use the ashtrays. […]
There was something wonderful about the words “… when we leave St Paul” in your letter. The idea of leaving and leaving with you, having you as indeed I’ve never had anyone or anything unless it be my portable typewriter, which I used to travel with. If you would only consent to traveling a little. This country will never be the same. But you don’t want to hear that, do you? […]
I love you deeply.
Jim […]
BETTY WAHL
150 Summit Avenue
January 16, Feast of St Marcellus, Martyr, St Honoratus, Confessor, St Elizabeth Alice, Virgin Beautiful
Dear Betty,
It is your birthday. I have just come from the city, where I was hard put to find something for your birthday. I had put off thinking about it until today, hoping to stroll into something. I didn’t, so I sent you books. I am sorry I could not get you something more essential or intimate. You were not much help, however, if you recall. I wish very much that the ring were ready. At times I regret that I didn’t buy one at a jewelry store. […] You are twenty-two. You are beginning to bloom. I thought of sending you the book Lovely Is the Lee, which is all about Ireland, but thought on second thought you would not enjoy it.3 There is a line in it, but I find I don’t have it now. Anyway, it says Ireland is like the heart of a woman: she will give all for love, nothing by force. That is good. It is too bad all women aren’t like that. You are. Do not change. […]
I love you.
Jim
Jim rejoiced when his obligation to work at the hospital was lifted. He arrived at the “great idea” of giving up the job and devoting himself to his own work with the financial assistance of Father Egan. This, two months into their engagement, was Betty’s first experience of Jim’s intransigence on the matter of work.
JOHN MARSHALL
150 Summit Avenue
January 19, 1946
Dear Marsh,
A note I’d like you to answer at once. George Barnhart4 called me from New York last night and said that it is now official, that it was “authorized,” that we are now free to accept such employment as we wish at such wages as we can get, meaning the hospital stuff is no more. […] I’d like to know what the word is in Chicago and assume you’ve had a better opportunity than I have here to find out. […] I don’t want a job, of course. Only the freedom to write and, it may be, starve. For I intend to make it like that, have had my mind made up for some time, and might as well begin to find out now if it’s possible. […]
Jim
BETTY WAHL
150 Summit Avenue
January 23, 1946
My dear Betty,
Your letter rec’d and read and reread. Also one from Fr Garrelts, with more ideas for the play;5 from a friend in Chicago who gives me the lowdown on parole there, and it looks like I am a free man, but I am not rushing down to demand it, am giving them a few days; a card from Fr Egan in which he says “Prince of Darkness”6 will only make the literati smirk, says it’s a balloon in fancy dress, but he is glad it’s over and now I can get down to work (I’ve got a notion to go over and confront him with my freedom, ask to be supported — he’s always talking about he’ll do it if I ever want him to); and that’s the mail. […]
And now … amen.
Pax,
Jim
HARVEY EGAN
150 Summit Avenue
January 1946
Dear Pere,
I have just rec’d your bill of disapproval. I wish that you’d try to be more approving. After all, where would the NY Times Book Section be today if they’d not liked as many masterpieces as you are on record for not liking. You’ll never be popular with that old critical attitude, finding everything wrong and poking fun. Did you ever stop to think that you and not the world may be wrong! Well, I am mostly curious about where you saw the story. More and more I am thinking you should have been a Jesuit, with your fabulous connections and interests, and all of them leading right smack into Rome. […]
Incidentally, turning to a subject dear to you, you can get your checkbook out any day now. There is a report that old JF will go free (my agents in Chicago and New York both tell me that’s the way it is now), and […] of course I am going on the HFXE7 payroll immediately. It was good of Fr Egan to offer to help me, and I was sure he meant it because he was always urging me to forsake my material concerns and fly to him. Pax.
Jim
JF “I can live on $100 a m.” P
BETTY WAHL
St Joseph’s Hospital
January 24, 1946
Dear Betty,
It’s a little past four in the morning, Thursday, and a few minutes ago, as I was removing the third “load” from the sterilizer, a great idea came to me. It does not directly concern you, so it is not absolutely great. But it is fairly great. I immediately thought of telling it to you, as I’m about to do, and then a few moments later it occurred to me that I ought to ask your advice, even permission. Here it is. I will quit this job and go live with Don and Mary, upstairs in one of those side rooms, the lightest one and warmest (though I will depend on an electric heater of some sort for heat), and write the stories I have in mind for the book, only two or three more, and will begin either my novel about priests (The Green Revolution) or the one about jail (The Hotel). By the time we get married, I will have a lot done. I work pretty damned well when I don’t do anything but write, I know from experience. I will pay Mary and Don at least seven dollars a week, more if I sell some stories for very much. Now tell me what you think of that, what you really think. […]