ORBIT GOGGLES
Several years ago, Orbit chewing gum introduced a cup-style package that fits perfectly in most vehicle cup holders. As I was about to throw one away the other day I noticed how the clear lid resembled a pair of welding goggles. After sourcing another lid and experimenting with some cord I was able to fashion a very suitable pair of protective goggles. The little flap door for popping out a piece of gum serves double duty as a vent to prevent fogging in cold weather. I’ll admit that they resemble the wardrobe from Mad Max, but I have no doubt they’ll protect the eyes from flying debris, branch slaps, dust, and sand. After an injury to my eye several years ago while camping I will never underestimate the importance of eye protection again.
MAKESHIFT BUTTERFLY BANDAGE
Here’s a quick and easy first-aid hack you may never have seen. I learned this one from an Army field medic while taking a wilderness first-aid class a few years back and thought it was great. As you know, bandages are a luxury in a survival scenario and you want to make the best possible use of them when necessary. Often, especially on the hands, fingers, and knuckles, traditional bandages just don’t work that well. To make them more flexible and adaptable, cut a center slice through each of the adhesive strips long-ways from the ends up to the bandage portion. Now, with 4 adhesive strips instead of 2, you can apply the bandage effectively to stubborn body parts.
A BETTER-THAN-NOTHING SOUP CAN GAS MASK
Many do-it-yourself gas masks have 2 main ingredients that help to filter out harmful chemicals/gases: activated charcoal and soda lime. The activated charcoal helps to trap particles as they pass through the breathing element, and the soda lime helps to neutralize acid gases. Equip yourself with a better-than-nothing gas mask in a pinch by packing an empty soup can with half crushed charcoal from a fire and half baking soda (sodium bicarbonate). Neither will perform as well as activated charcoal and soda lime, but both are better than nothing. Take one end completely off of the soup can. Cut a hole and insert a plastic pipe 1" into the other end. Duct-tape it in place so there are no leaks. Pack some paper towels or a rag firmly in the soup can against the pipe opening. Loosely pack the rest of the can with half crushed charcoal and half baking soda and tape another rag on the top to hold it all in place. Breathe in through the pipe and exhale through your nose.
SURVIVAL EYEBLACK
As mentioned in the Duct Tape Snow Goggles hack in this chapter, taking steps to prevent eye burn from the sun or snow can be critical to survival. A very effective way to hack your own survival eyeblack in the field is to mix some lip balm with crushed charcoal. Although the wax-based balm will work, petroleum jelly–based products work even better. Smear the greasy “paint” beneath your eyes to prevent sun glare and also improve visibility in both desert and Arctic conditions.
2-LITER SAFETY GOGGLES
I consider safety goggles a necessity in any disaster survival scenario. The ability to quickly make a pair from trash is a great skill to have. A trash 2-liter bottle is the perfect hack for this. The curved contour of the bottle makes a pair of light-duty safety goggles that naturally curl around your eyes and face without the use of a tie or elastic strap. Using a knife or scissors, cut a 2" section from the center of a 2-liter bottle. Next, make a top-to-bottom slice through one side so that you can open up the circle. Carve a groove for the bridge of your nose, and line the edges with tape for a comfortable fit. The ends can be tapered like a pair of sunglasses if you find that more comfortable. A head strap is optional but recommended.
THE BEST NATURAL MOSQUITO REPELLENT
Mosquitoes are arguably worse in the North Woods. Many woodsmen from Michigan or Alaska will tell you that the mosquito is their state bird. Ironically, one of the best natural mosquito repellents is only found in the North Woods—birch oil. The trick is extracting birch oil from the white, papery bark of the birch tree. To do it, you’ll need 2 cans. One should be approximately the size of a 1-gallon paint can with a lid and the other about the size of a small soup can. Fill the large paint can with birch bark, put on the metal lid, and then punch a hole in the center bottom. Bury the small can in the ground so that the open top is flush with the ground and place the larger bark-filled can directly on top of it so that the hole is over the smaller can. Finally, build a fire around the large can and let it burn for about 30 minutes. The heat will extract the oil from the bark, which will drip into the smaller can below. Smear this oil on your skin to repel mosquitoes.
A NOT-SO-STRAWEFUL TICK PULLER
Ticks are nasty critters and the bane of many a woodsman. The best way to rid yourself of ticks is to pinch the head with tweezers and pull upward with steady, even pressure. In the absence of suitable tweezers, make a tick puller from a plastic drinking straw. Using a knife or scissors, cut an eye-shaped hole toward the end of the straw large enough to fit over the tick’s body. The outside tip of the eye cut (the side closest to the edge of the straw) should come to a very fine point. Slide the eye over the tick and pull from the side, wedging the tick’s head and neck in the corner of this fine-cut point. Steadily pull until the tick detaches, and then wash the affected area with soap and water.
HORSEFLY SHOTGUN
Black flies and horseflies can be a force to be reckoned with during hot summer months. When I was a boy, I learned a simple and fun trick to quickly and easily kill them. It happened by accident at the beach. Whenever we went to the beach I would bring my slingshot so that I could launch dog food kibbles into the water for fish to eat. While I was playing in the sand, the black flies and horseflies were driving me crazy. I noticed a big horsefly that landed on my sand castle, and having run out of dog food kibble ammunition, I filled my slingshot pouch with a pinch of beach sand and blasted him from nearly 5' away. The sand dispersed in a shotgun effect when launched from the slingshot, and I quickly discovered that I could kill any black fly or horsefly within a 10' radius—even flying!
HYGIENE HACKS
BBQ SPIT BATH
This hack comes from one of my favorite movies of all time—The Book of Eli. Prepackaged wet naps that you’ll often find at BBQ restaurants make perfect mini spit bath towelettes. I keep a couple in most of my survival kits for just that purpose. They are typically free, weigh almost nothing, and do not expire as far as I’ve noticed. Two wet naps make for a pretty decent spit bath. There is a bit of a science to mini towelette spit bathing. Use the first one for your face, neck, armpits, and feet, in that order. Use the second for your unmentionables, front to back. If you wish to reuse, boil to sterilize in a small cup or can of water and repeat.
ULTRALIGHT CLOTHESPINS
All clothing becomes less efficient when the fibers are clogged with dirt, grime, and oils. They lose breathability and insulating properties, which are both important features to warm- and cold-weather survival. Washing clothing may become a necessity in order to maintain good field hygiene. Drying your wet clothes on a line in the sun or by the fire can be a little tricky if the wind picks up. I recently discovered the coolest little lightweight clothespins while I was making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich of all things. Plastic bread bag clips are the perfect shape for clipping a garment onto a paracord drying line. The rigid hooks hold the garment tightly and securely even during wind gusts. I’ve added a few to my bug out bag just in case! Note: A bread bag clip can also prevent the toe thong from pulling through on your camp sandals. Just slide it between the bottom of the shoe and the button on the end of the toe thong.