Mr. Smith smiled at her. "My apologies for being a concerned motorist, ma'am." He turned to the officer. "Do I need to do anything else, Officer?"
"You need to follow me to the station to fill out some paperwork," the officer said. He began to lead Brad toward the patrol car. To Lisa: "Lawyers, huh? Looks like you'll be needing one yourselves, ma'am."
"I plan on having a word with your captain, too," Lisa said.
"Whatever." The cop opened the back passenger-side door of his cruiser and Brad slid inside. "Watch your head," the officer said.
Brad looked up at Lisa. "Call Billy, honey."
"I'll follow you to the police station," Lisa said. The officer slammed the door.
"Okay," the officer said, turning to Lisa. His face was expressionless, his features stony. "Let's get this show on the road."
Three
The Days Inn off the Interstate had vacancies. Lisa Miller was sitting on the lumpy queen-sized mattress in her room, her suitcase opened, phone book out. The curtains were drawn, the rays of the setting sun bleeding through and casting shades of orange across the table and part of the bed. Lisa and Brad had been looking forward to this vacation for the past six months; now it was shot to hell thanks to that Mr. Smith asshole.
Thinking about the situation again made Lisa want to smash something, preferably Mr. Smith's smug, self-righteous face. The nerve of that man!
She had seethed the whole time she was at the sheriff's substation. First she had to watch Brad be led back to the jail. Then she had to watch that prick of a cop come out with some paperwork and talk to that Mr. Smith numbfuck who had been standing on the opposite side of the lobby, pausing every now and then to grin at her. It was hard to ignore the man; she had to fight the urge to walk across the lobby and rip his smug face off his skull. Just you wait, she had thought as she watched the officer hand the paperwork to Mr. Smith and instructed him on how to fill it out. When this is over, I'm not even going to wait for Brad to come to trial. I'm going to slap you with the biggest lawsuit you've ever seen. You won't know what hit you. You'll wish you had driven that fucking van of yours off a cliff
When the officer was finished with Mr. Smith, he had come to her. He wasn't wearing those stupid cop sun glasses anymore. His eyes were like cold flint. They were cop's eyes-cold, unemotional, uncaring. "I need to explain to you your legal rights and the ramifications of a citizen's arrest," he began. "The first thing I suggest is find yourself a motel room in the area. Your husband is going to be in a cell until Monday, when we can drive him to the Ventura County courthouse and have him arraigned. The bail will probably be low, but you can never tell what mood the judge will be in. I suggest getting a lawyer this weekend."
"I've already got one," Lisa huffed, arms crossed in front of her chest, looking boldly at the officer.
"You mentioned back at the scene that you and your husband are lawyers; what,kind?"
"Family law"
"Then I'll explain to you what you may not have learned in law school. The reason I can't allow you to make a citizen's arrest on Mr. Smith is because one, your claim, if it's true, is a misdemeanor offense. Mr. Smith claims to have witnessed felonies. The minimum statute which a private citizen can file a complaint for a citizen's arrest is a felony punishable by up to one year in prison. That's just the minimum."
"And driving within the legal limits of the law is a felony," Lisa said with a hint of sarcasm. "I see. 7bank you for clarifying that for me".
The officer ignored the remark and continued. "When I talked to Mr. Smith back at the scene, I explained all the legal ramifications to him. I don't know what happened back there because I didn't see it. Mr. Smith claims to have witnessed your husband driving in a reckless manner in a way that would have put other motorists in grave danger. His descriptions to the 911 operator amounted to that of at least two felonies, and that's when I was dispatched. Otherwise I wouldn't have made the arrest. I did explain to Mr. Smith the consequences he could face should the case be thrown out, or if your husband is found not guilty; that he could face a civil lawsuit. He was firm that he understood and that he wanted to pursue the complaint, so by law I was obligated to place your husband in custody."
"Should this go to trial, is he called as a witness?" Lisa asked, motioning across the room toward Mr. Smith.
"Depends on what the DA says. The paperwork Mr. Smith is filling out will require him to explain precisely what he saw, including information on where he lives and other contact information. In most cases, that is all anyone needs to do in making a citizen's arrest. In some cases, nothing further is needed of the witness. That isn't always the case!
"So all this crap that asshole says we did… speeding, and swerving dangerously in traffic and braking suddenly… that's a felony?"
"Reckless driving with the intent to cause grave bodily injury or property damage is a felony in the state of California," the cop said. "Like I said, the minimum for which a citizen-and that's anybody-can file a citizen's arrest is that the crime they witness has to be a felony punishable by up to one year in jail. That's why you don't hear about people making citizen's and on jaywalkers."
"What about witnesses?" Lisa asked. "Or physical evidence? Will the DA try to gather some?"
"Who knows?" The officer shrugged. "My guess is they won't. A case like this, it's you and your husband's word against Mr. Smith's. Personally, I think the DA will take one look at this case Monday morning and decline to file charges. I told Mr. Smith that I didn't think he had a very good chance in something like this, especially out on an open highway. Of course, if other people call in to say they saw it happening, then there might be a stronger case. But unless that happens, there isn't much to go on." The cop cocked his head and his features became softer. "If you don't mind me asking, did you notice this guy before this happened?"
Lisa had almost exploded with anger, but she held it in. We're only told you eight million fucking times that this asshole was dogging us all the way from the last rest stop! Instead she had said, We noticed him just after we pulled out of a rest stop twenty miles or so back. There wasn't much traffic, and Brad made a lane change to pass a slow-moving vehicle. There was nobody, and I mean nobody in that lane, and then all of a sudden that guy," she motioned to Mr. Smith, "was right there on our ass, tailgating us like crazy."
The cop had actually listened. He had nodded as Lisa spun the story, his eyes darting over to Mr. Smith, then settling back on Lisa. Lisa had felt a little better that somebody was finally listening to her now, but she was still angry over the way she and Brad had been treated, especially at the hands of this cop. When she was finished, the cop nodded. "I'm sorry for what happened," he had said. "I'll be perfectly honest in saying that I really can't do anything about the situation. But I would like to say off the record that I think the judge or the DA is going to take one look at the complaint against your husband and throw it out. I know your vacation is probably all shot to hell now-"
"It is."
The cop had nodded, his features apologetic. "I explained to Mr. Smith the full consequences that could happen should the outcome be found in your favor. I explained that he would be fully opening himself up to a civil suit, and despite that, he wanted to proceed. Between you and me, I think the guy has a screw loose."
"I think he did this because he was zooming along at a hundred miles an hour," Lisa had said in a hushed whisper. She had been facing the officer, but her eyes were fixed on Mr. Smith's back as he bent over the paperwork at the counter. "That's why Brad didn't see him in the lane, and it also explains why he was suddenly there right on us. He probably got pissed off because he had to slow down to avoid hitting us, and I'm sure it didn't make matters any better when Brad slowed down as we descended the hill. Brad got back into the slow lane, but he followed us, right on our tail!