“You want me to read it?” he asked hesitantly.
She nodded. “It’s for you. I mean, this is. I always do my rough draft in a journal such as this and I keep them but I want you to have this one.”
“Is it okay if I read it now? I’ll call down for breakfast. You can go down and eat or I can have it brought up here. Entirely up to you.”
She nodded. “I’ll eat up here with you if that’s okay.”
He smiled. “I’d like that. Make yourself comfortable.”
Taking him at his word, she found the couch, but more than the comfort it offered, she wanted away from him where she couldn’t see his facial expressions as he read her story.
He leaned back in his chair and carefully opened the journal. She watched from the corner of her eye as he turned each page, his forehead creased in concentration.
A moment later, a knock sounded and the woman Cole employed to run his kitchen came in bearing a tray of breakfast for Ren. She set it on the coffee table in front of the couch where Ren sat and then backed away, disappearing as quickly as she’d come.
Ren smiled. All her favorites. A cup of hot chocolate. A toasted bagel with cream cheese with scrambled eggs and bacon piled on top.
She settled down to eat but she still kept subtle watch on Cole. When she finished, Cole was still deep in concentration, and she knew she couldn’t be here when he finished.
She rose and wiped her hands down her pants. “I’m, uhm …I’m going to go grab a shower. I’ve been up forever. Need to brush my teeth. Do all my girlie stuff.”
Cole looked up from the journal, blinking as if he’d forgotten she was there. “All right. I’ll find you later.”
She fled the room, grateful to have an excuse to leave. She did shower but did none of the girlie stuff she’d hinted at. She didn’t even dry her hair but rather combed it straight, dressed and then went outside into the garden.
There was a nip in the air and she breathed deeply, enjoying the scent of smoke either from burning leaves or perhaps a nearby chimney.
She wandered down one of the spiraling pathways to a fountain in the center of the garden. She sat on the bench and listened to the soothing bubble of water splashing over the rim.
She was finished. Another book done. With each project she completed, though there hadn’t been many yet, she always feared being able to duplicate the creativity that went into creating the story. What if she couldn’t do it again?
Lucas had laughed over her fear and told her that she was brilliant and that only brilliant people worried about not being brilliant any longer.
It hadn’t made sense to her but she liked the idea that someone found her intelligent. She didn’t always feel smart for some of the choices she’d made.
For how long she sat, soaking up the peace and tranquility around her, she wasn’t sure but she heard footsteps and looked up to see Cole walk toward her, the journal in his hand.
Her mouth went dry. Why did his opinion matter so much? She should be able to shrug it off. Subjectivity and all that jazz.
He sat beside her and for a long moment didn’t say anything at all. Then he turned to her, his eyes full of wonder.
“You’re amazing, Ren. I’m so damn proud of you.”
Her cheeks warmed and she went limp with relief. Joy shot through her veins like a dose of adrenaline.
“You liked it?”
“Liked it? I think like is way too tame of a word to describe my reaction. You’re so talented. The pictures, the way you turn a phrase. Your writing is very evocative. It’s very …nostalgic. God, it made me think of so many things in my childhood that are bittersweet.”
He reached up to touch her cheek, smoothing his thumb over her skin. “And it reminded me of us.”
Her chest ached and her throat knotted. “It was us. In a way. Perhaps a younger and more innocent us. A fledgling friendship but a relationship that meant the world to them as ours meant the world to us.”
“Yes, I could see that. Reading it made me ache, Ren. I’m so damn proud of you. It was an amazing story. I’ll treasure the draft you gave me always. And even when it’s worth millions of dollars because you’ve become rich and famous beyond words, I’ll still treasure my copy and keep it safe and private.”
She leaned into his side and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Thank you. That means the world to me. For so many years I felt so …adrift. Only in the last year have I begun to think I know what I’m meant to do and be. It probably sounds silly and melodramatic but it’s taken me a long time to get to this point where I feel like I have direction.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I don’t think it’s silly at all. Sometimes it takes some longer than others to find their way. It doesn’t make their contribution any less valuable.”
She smiled and hugged him tighter. “I love you.”
“And I love you, darling Ren.”
She snuggled a little deeper into his arms and closed her eyes.
He let her remain there a moment longer before carefully prying her away. “What do you say I take you to bed now? You’ve been up well over twenty-four hours. You have to be exhausted.”
She nodded ruefully. “I am. I feel like I could sleep forever.”
He rose and then pulled her to her feet beside him. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and walked her back toward the house.
CHAPTER 33
“Lucas is here.”
Ren’s head shot up at the grim statement. She was sitting at her desk checking e-mails and taking care of things she’d let languish during the time she was with Cole and when she’d been working.
She wanted to be calm but her hands shook, betraying the turmoil that churned inside her. She stared at Cole who stood just inside the door, trying to get a read on him.
His features were impassive. There was no expression on his face. His eyes were shuttered.
She pushed herself upward and she walked haltingly toward the door to stand before Cole.
“Where?” she croaked.
“Outside.”
She pushed by Cole and walked down the stairs, her pace quickening with each step. By the time she arrived at the door she was nearly running. Her hand closed around the knob and she drew in steadying breaths as she tried to calm her raging emotions.
Then she flung the door open and stepped outside.
Lucas’s car was parked just a few yards away and he stood, leaning against the passenger door, looking as arrogant as ever. He seemed relaxed while she herself was a flaming mess.
He was here but now what? Was he saying good-bye? Had he come to bring her things?
And then he simply opened his arms and she flew across the gravel to launch herself into his embrace.
He wrapped his strong arms around her and held her tightly. To her shock he shook against her. Every bit as much as she shook.
“You came,” she whispered. “You came.”
He hoisted her up in his arms until she straddled his waist and he was holding her up on eye level. “I’ll always come for you, Ren. Never doubt it.”
His dark eyes flashed with tenderness, clear affection, but this time there was something much stronger there. Something beyond sweet regard.
He pressed his lips to hers in a gesture so gentle it nearly undid her. There was no control or dominance in the kiss. It felt as unsure and as relieved as she’d been.
“I thought you were leaving,” she said in a cracked voice. “That this was your way of moving on. Of making sure I was taken care of. I thought you were tired of me.”
He cursed colorfully under his breath and gently lowered her to her feet. Then he tipped her chin up to meet his burning gaze.