Actually, that sounded like a wonderful idea.
"If you would, please. I'd really appreciate it."
She hopped off the bed and made for the washstand while I tried to find a more comfortable position.
After rearranging the pillows, I glanced over to see what was keeping her, only to find her standing stock still, staring at the wall.
"Bunny? Is there something wrong?" I called.
"I guess I was wrong," she said in a strange tone, still staring at the wall.
"How's that?"
"When I said you probably left a bad impression on your date ... I think I should have kept my mouth shut."
"What makes you say that?"
"I take it you haven't seen this."
She gestured at the wall over the washstand. I squinted slightly and focused my still-bleary eyes on the spot she was indicating.
Written on the wall, in bright red lipstick, was a note.
Skeeve,
Sorry to go, but I didn't want to wake you. Last night was magic. You're as good as your rep. Let me know when you want to play some more.
Cassandra
I found myself smirking as I read the note.
"Well, I guess she wasn't too upset with my drinking. Eh, Bunny?"
There was no answer.
"Bunny?"
I tore my eyes away from the message and glanced around the room. The tray was still there, but Bunny wasn't. With the door standing open, the only logical conclusion was that she had left without saying a word.
Suddenly, I didn't feel so smug anymore.
Chapter Eleven:
"If labor and management communicated better, there would be fewer terminations."
J. HOFFA
"Hi, BUTTERCUP, How's it going, fellah?"
The war unicorn raised his head and stared at me for a moment, then went back to eating from his feed bin.
"Com'on, fellah. You know me," I urged.
The unicorn continued eating, ignoring me completely.
"Don't worry, Boss" came a squeaky voice from behind me. "Unicorns are like that."
I didn't have to look to see who the voice belonged to, but turned to face my bodyguard anyway.
"Hi, Nunzio," I said. "What was that about unicorns?"
"They're temperamental," he explained with a shrug. "War unicorns like Buttercup are no exception. He's just giving you a rough time because you haven't been visiting him much."
One of the assorted things I had learned about Nunzio's past was that at one time he had been an animal trainer, so I tended to believe him. I was a little disappointed, however. I had been hoping that Buttercup's reaction to me would provide a confirmation as to what did or didn't happen between Cassandra and me the night before, but it seemed there were other, more rational, possible reasons for his standoffishness.
Of course, fast on the heels of my disappointment came a surge of guilt. I had been neglecting my pets badly ... along with a lot of other things.
"That reminds me, Nunzio," I said, eager to shift the guilt, "how are you doing with Gleep?"
My bodyguard frowned and wiped a massive hand across his mouth and chin in thought.
"I dunno, Boss," he said. "I can't quite put my finger on it, but there's somethin' wrong there. He just don't feel right lately."
Strangely enough, that made sense. In fact, Nunzio had managed to put into words my own nebulous concerns about my pet ... he didn't feel right.
"Maybe we're going about this wrong," I said. "Maybe instead of trying to pin down what's wrong with him now, we should try to backtrack a bit."
"I don't quite follow you," my bodyguard scowled.
"Think back, Nunzio," I urged. When did you first notice that Gleep wasn't acting normal?"
"Well ... he seemed okay when Markie was around," he said thoughtfully. "In fact, if you think about it, he was the first of us to figure she wasn't on the up and up."
Something flitted across my mind along with that memory, but Nunzio kept talking and it disappeared again.
"I'd have to say it was right after that job when him and me was guarding that warehouse. You remember? With the forged comic books?"
"Was he all right on that assignment?"
"Sure. I remember talkin' with him quite a bit while we was sittin' around doin' nothin'. He was fine then."
"Wait a minute," I interrupted. "You were talking with Gleep?"
"I guess it was more like talkin' to him, since he doesn't really answer back." Nunzio corrected himself easily. "You know what I mean, Boss. Anyway, I spent a lot of time talkin' to him, and he seemed okay then. In fact, he seemed to listen real close."
"What did you talk to him about?"
My bodyguard hesitated, then glanced away quickly.
"Oh ... this and that," he said with an exaggerated shrug. "I really can't remember for sure."
"Nunzio," I said, letting a note of sternness creep into my voice, "if you can remember, tell me. It's important."
"Well ... I was goin' on a bit about how worried I was about you, Boss," Nunzio admitted hesitantly. "You remember how you was right after we decided to incorporate? How you was gettin' so wrapped up in work that you didn't have much time for anything or anyone else? I just unloaded on Gleep a bit about how I didn't think it was healthy for you, is all. I didn't think it would hurt nothin'. That's why I did my talkin' in front of him and not anyone else on the team ... even Guido."
There were clear images dancing in my head now. Pictures of Gleep breathing fire at Markie ... who only escaped narrowly when Nunzio intervened ... and of my pet throwing himself in front of me when another, larger dragon was on the brink of making me extinct.
"Think carefully, Nunzio" I said slowly. "When you were talking to Gleep, did you say anything ... anything at all ... about the possibility of Tananda or anyone else on the team being a threat to me?"
My bodyguard frowned thoughtfully for a moment, then shook his head.
"I don't remember sayin' anything like that, Boss. Why do you ask?"
Now it was my turn to hesitate. The idea that was taking shape in my mind seemed almost too silly to voice. Still, since I was turning to Nunzio for advice and expertise, it was only fair to share my suspicions with him.
"It may be crazy," I said, "but I'm starting to get the feeling that Gleep is a lot more intelligent that we ever suspected. I mean, he's always been kind of protective of me. If he were intelligent and got it into his head that someone on the team was a threat to me, there's a chance he might try to kill them ... just like he went after Markie."
My bodyguard stared at me, then gave a short bark of laughter.
"You're right, Boss," he said. "That does sound crazy. I mean, Gleep's a dragon! If he was to try to whack someone on the team, we'd know it pretty fast, know what I mean?"
"Like when he tried to burn Tananda?" I pressed. "Think about it, Nunzio. If he were intelligent, wouldn't part of his conclusions be that I would be upset if anything happened to anyone on the team? In that case, wouldn't he do his best to make any mishap look like an accident rather than a direct attack? I'll admit it's a wild theory, but it fits the facts."
"Except for one thing," my bodyguard countered. "For him to be doin' what you say, puttin' pieces together and comin' up with his own conclusions, much less organizing a plan and executing it, would make him more than intelligent. It would make him smarter than us! Remember, for a dragon he's still real young. It would be like sayin' a baby that could hardly walk was planning a bank heist."
"I suppose you're right," I sighed. "There must be another explanation."
"You know, Boss," Nunzio smiled, "folks say that, after a while, pets start takin' on the traits of their masters and vice verses. Takin' that into consideration, I think it's only logical that Gleep here acts a bit strange from time to time."
For some reason, that brought to mind my earlier conversation with Bunny.
"Tell me, Nunzio, do you think I've been drinking too much lately?"
"That's not for me to say, Boss," he said easily. "I'm just a bodyguard, not a babysitter."