Sometimes she was his little girl, snuggling up to him and purring like a cat. Sometimes she was on the brink of despair, stomping around the flat completely out of her mind, laying into him with accusations that he was a bad father for leaving her and Sindri Snaer when they were so young. She could also be coarse, and malicious and evil. But sometimes he thought she was her true self, almost normal, if indeed there is such a thing, and Erlendur felt he could talk to her like a human being.
She wore tattered jeans and a black leather bomber jacket. Her hair was short and jet black, she had two silver rings in her right eyebrow and a silver cross hanging from one ear. She’d had beautiful white teeth once but they were starting to show the signs: when she gave a wide smile it transpired that two upper ones were missing. She was very thin, and her face was drawn, with dark rings under the eyes. Erlendur sometimes felt he could see his own mother’s likeness in her. He cursed Eva Lind’s fate and blamed his own neglect for the way she had turned out.
“I talked to Mum today. Or rather, she talked to me and asked if I would talk to you. Great having divorced parents.”
“Does your mother want something from me?” Erlendur asked in surprise. After 20 years she still hated him. He’d caught just one glimpse of her in all that time and there had been no mistaking the loathing on her face. She’d spoken to him once about Sindri Snaer, but that was a conversation he preferred to forget.
“She’s such a snobby bitch.”
“Don’t talk about your mother like that.”
“It’s about some filthy rich friends of hers from Gardabaer. Married their daughter off at the weekend and she just did a runner from the wedding. Really embarrassing. That was on Saturday and she hasn’t been in touch since. Mum was at the wedding and she’s knocked out by the scandal of it. I’m supposed to ask if you’ll talk to the parents. They don’t want to put an announcement in the papers, bloody snobs, but they know you’re in the CID and reckon they can do it all really hush-hush. I’m the one who’s supposed to ask you to talk to that crowd. Not Mum. You get it? Never!”
“Do you know these people?”
“Well, I wasn’t invited to the wedding party the little bimbo fucked up.”
“Did you know the girl then?”
“Hardly.”
“And where could she have run off to?”
“How should I know?”
Erlendur shrugged.
“I was thinking about you just a minute ago,” he said.
“Nice,” Eva Lind said. “I just happened to be wondering if…”
“I haven’t got any money,” Erlendur said, sitting down in his armchair to face her. “Are you hungry?”
Eva Lind arched her back.
“Why can’t I ever talk to you without you going on about money?” she said and Erlendur felt as though she’d stolen his line.
“And why can’t I ever talk to you, period?”
“Oh, fuck you.”
“What are you speaking like that for? What’s wrong? ’Fuck you!’ ’How’s it hanging?’ What kind of language is that?”
“Jesus,” Eva Lind groaned.
“Who are you this time? Which one am I talking to now? Where’s the real you in all this pile of dope?”
“Don’t start that crap again. ’Who are you?’ ” she mimicked him. “Where’s the real you? I’m here. I’m sitting in front of you. I’m me!”
“Eva.”
“Ten thousand crowns!” she said. “What’s that to you? Can’t you come up with ten thousand? You’re rolling in cash.”
Erlendur looked at his daughter. There was something about her that he’d noticed the moment she’d arrived. She was short of breath, there were beads of sweat on her forehead and she constantly wriggled in her seat. As if she were ill.
“Are you ill?” he asked.
“I’m fine. I just need a bit of money. Please, don’t be difficult.”
“Are you ill?”
“Please.”
Erlendur went on looking at his daughter.
“Are you trying to quit?” he said.
“Please, ten thousand. That’s nothing. Nothing for you. I’ll never come back and ask you for money again.”
“Yes, quite. How long is it since you…” Erlendur hesitated, unsure how to phrase it, “…used that stuff?”
“Doesn’t matter. I’ve given up. Given up giving up giving up giving up giving up giving up giving up!” Eva Lind was on her feet. “Let me have ten thousand. Please. Five. Let me have five thousand. Haven’t you got that in your pocket? Five! That’s peanuts.”
“Why are you trying to stop now?”
Eva Lind looked at her father. “No stupid questions. I’m not giving up. Giving up what? What should I give up? You give up talking such crap!”
“What’s going on? What are you so worked up about? Are you ill?”
“Yeah, I’m sick as a pig. Can you lend me ten thousand? It’s a loan, I’ll pay you back, eh? Avaricious bastard.”
“Avaricious is a good word. Are you ill, Eva?”
“What do you keep asking that for?” she said and grew still more agitated.
“Are you running a temperature?”
“Let me have the money. Two thousand! That’s nothing! You don’t understand. Stupid old git!”
Erlendur was now on his feet too and she went up to him as if she was going to attack.
He couldn’t fathom this sudden aggressiveness. He looked her up and down.
“What are you looking at?” she shouted in his face. “Fancy a bit? Eh? Does dirty old Daddy fancy a bit?”
Erlendur slapped her face, but not very hard.
“Did you enjoy that?” she said.
He slapped her again, harder this time.
“Getting a hard-on?” she said, and Erlendur leapt back from her. She’d never talked to him like this. In an instant she’d become a monster. He’d never seen her in this mood before. He felt helpless towards her and his anger gradually gave way to pity.
“Why are you trying to give up now?” he repeated.
“I’m not trying to give up now!” she shouted. “What’s wrong with you? Can’t you understand what I’m saying? Who’s talking about giving up?”
“What’s wrong, Eva?”
“You stop that ’what’s wrong, Eva’! Can’t you let me have five thousand? Can you answer me?” She appeared to be calming down. Maybe she realised she’d gone too far, she couldn’t talk to her father that way.
“Why now?” Erlendur asked.
“Will you let me have ten thousand if I tell you?”
“What’s happened?”
“Five thousand.”
Erlendur stared at his daughter.
“Are you pregnant?” he asked.
Eva Lind looked at her father with a submissive smile.
“Bingo,” she said.
“But how?” Erlendur groaned.
“What do you mean, how? Do you want me to go into details?”
“None of that clever talk. You use protection, surely? Condoms? The pill?”
“I don’t know what happened. It just happened.”
“And you want to give up dope?”
“Not any more. I can’t. Now I’ve told you everything. Everything! You owe me ten thousand.”
“To get your baby stoned.”
“It’s not a baby, you jerk. It’s not anything. It’s a grain of sand. I can’t give up right away. I’ll give up tomorrow. I promise. Just not now. Two thousand. What’s that to you?”
Erlendur walked back to her. “But you tried. You want to give up. I’ll help you.”
“I can’t!” Eva Lind shouted. The sweat poured from her face and she tried to conceal the trembling that ran through her whole body.
“That’s why you came to see me,” Erlendur said. “You could have gone somewhere else to get money. You’ve done that until now. But you came to me because you want…”