I glanced down and froze. There was a key sitting there. I set the can down and picked up the key. I turned it over and over in my hands, thinking of Chloe. She had been here. I threw down the key and ran back to the entryway. Her shoes and spare jacket were both gone. I checked the living room next and saw that her books were gone from where she’d left them on the table. I went to the bathroom and found the same thing. Her toiletries were no longer there.
Taking a deep breath, I walked down the stairs to the basement where most of her stuff was boxed up. We’d planned on unpacking it all when we got back home. Everything was missing. I slid down the wall until I was sitting on the floor with my head on my knees. Everything was gone. She was gone. I’d hoped that her things would still be here. That maybe, just maybe, she hadn’t completely given up on us. But knowing that she’s come to pick up all of her shit was like being slapped across the face.
I stood and grabbed the first thing I saw—one of my uncle’s stupid bowling trophies. I threw it against the wall and watched as it shattered from the force of the impact. I couldn’t handle this. I was done. If she didn’t want me, then fuck it. Fuck everything. Fuck her.
I stomped back up the stairs and grabbed the cocaine I had stashed in my bag. I walked to the couch and sat down. I poured what was left in the bag onto the glass top of my coffee table. I pulled out a credit card from my wallet and used it to crush the powder and separate it into lines.
After grabbing and rolling a bill, I snorted each line. It was more coke than I usually did at once and I felt the effects start to take over quickly. I relaxed as I lay down on the couch and stared at the ceiling. I wanted the drug to take away all my pain, my anger, and the betrayal I felt. I was so tired of feeling all the time.
Sometime later, I heard a knock on the door. I had been playing my guitar on the couch, but stopped as I stood up to see who it was. I could still feel the effects of the cocaine in my system as I stumbled to the door. The knock came again just as I reached for the knob and opened the door. Jade was standing on the porch, holding a bag of food from the Mexican restaurant by her house. My stomach growled loudly as I smelled the food. I hadn’t realized just how hungry I was until then.
She looked concerned as she took in my appearance. “You okay?”
Between the coke and finding out that Chloe had moved all of her things out, I knew I had to look like shit. “I’m fine. I was just messing around with my guitar.”
“Oh, okay then.” She held up the bag. “I come bearing food. Consider it a peace offering.”
I swung open the door to let her pass by me. I followed as she walked past the living room and straight into the kitchen. After setting the bag on the counter, she pulled out two to-go boxes and handed one to me while stashing the other one in my refrigerator. I grabbed a fork from a drawer and sat down at the kitchen table.
“Thanks.” I opened my container to see two enchiladas and rice waiting for me. Compared to the peaches I had earlier, this was heaven in a box.
“No problem. I figured you wouldn’t have much to eat, so I thought I’d bring you something.”
“I appreciate it.” I waited for her to tell me why she was really here.
Three. Two. One.
“And I kind of wanted to talk to you about earlier.” She said as she watched me devour my food.
Bingo. I remained silent as I shoved food into my mouth.
“I just feel bad for how we acted earlier. You’re like my brother, and I’m worried about you. I don’t want to lose you.”
My stomach clenched as I watched her eyes fill with tears. Jade was not an emotional person, and I felt like an ass for bringing her to tears.
“Don’t cry, Jade. I’m not mad at you. Honest. I promise that you aren’t going to lose me.”
She sniffled as she wiped away the tears that had fallen down her cheeks. “You’re not my Drake anymore. I’m not sure who you are, but I know that I don’t like him. I want my Drake back.”
“I’m right here, Jade. Please don’t cry. You’re killing me.”
She laughed. “You always did suck with emotions.”
“You’re telling me,” I grumbled.
“Anyway, will you please just think about getting help? Don’t do it for me or the guys or even Chloe. Do it for yourself. You’re better than this.”
I sighed as I put my fork down. “I know. I’m working on it, okay? I refuse to go to rehab, but I’ll get my shit together for you guys. I promise.”
She stood and walked around the table to stand beside me. “I hope so, Drake. If not, you’re going to rip the band apart.” She leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. “I’m going home, but I’ll see you tomorrow. Call me if you need anything, okay?”
“Thanks, Jade. I will.”
I stared at the food in front of me as she let herself out. What was I doing? How had I become this person? I hated myself for being weak. I was better than this. I shoved the food away from me. My appetite was gone. My leg started bouncing up and down as anger and disgust flooded my body. I stood up and kicked the chair away from me. It crashed to the floor, but I ignored it as I walked to the front door and threw it open. I couldn’t stay here by myself tonight, or I’d go mad.
Instead of taking my car, I decided to walk to wherever my destination might be. I ended up standing in Gold’s parking lot, staring at the building that I’d spent countless hours in. Maybe going back to my roots would help clear my head. My home wasn’t really my home anyway. It was my uncle’s house, and without Chloe there, it was nothing more than a shell of a life that I’d never have.
I shook my head to clear it and walked across the lot to the door. The usual bouncer, Jerry, was standing just inside the entrance, and he smiled when he saw me.
“Well, look who decided to grace us with his presence. Where’s the rest of the band?”
“Good to see you, too, Jerry. I’m assuming they’re at home, sleeping off our summer,” I said as I shook his hand.
“Ah, gotcha. What brings you in here by yourself then? Where’s that pretty girl of yours?”
My stomach clenched at the mention of Chloe. When I decided to come in here, it hadn’t crossed my mind that the regulars wouldn’t know Chloe and I weren’t together anymore. That was something I didn’t want to repeat over and over again.
I sighed as I ran my hand through my hair. “We’re not together anymore.”
Jerry’s mouth dropped open. “Wait…what? Why? I figured you two would run off and get married this summer or some crazy shit like that. It seemed like you two were meant to be together.”
I snorted. “Yeah, I thought so, too, until I fucked everything up.”
“Dude, tell me you didn’t cheat on her. If you did, I will personally kick your ass. Chloe is such a sweet girl.”
“I didn’t, and she is. It’s complicated, and I don’t want to talk about it.”
He nodded. “Sorry. I didn’t know. I wouldn’t have brought it up if I had.”
“It’s fine. Listen, I’m going to grab a beer. I’ll catch ya later.”
“It’s good to see you again. Don’t be a stranger, all right?”
I nodded and turned to head to my usual table. When I found no one sitting there, I guessed it was permanently claimed by Breaking the Hunger, even after we’d been gone for months. I had barely sat down when a waitress I didn’t recognize appeared beside me.
“What can I get for you?” she asked cheerfully, looking me over.
I could tell from her expression that she liked what she saw, but I wasn’t interested. She was pretty, but she wasn’t Chloe. I mentally smacked myself as I compared the two of them in my head. They both had platinum blonde hair and blue eyes, but that was where the similarities ended. This girl was several inches taller with an athletic build whereas Chloe was all soft edges and beautiful curves.