Felicity jerked around at Beth’s question. A quiver trembled in her belly. Even wrapping her arms around her belly procured no added warmth or relief from her troubling thoughts.
The time was now.
She stood in a small clutter-free room adjacent the mighty hall. She could hear voices colliding together into one as people chatted excitedly. This was the occasion to behold, made even more scandalous by the fact that their invitations originally had a different woman’s name on it. Scandalous indeed. This was the mating ceremony of the century. The press was camped out at every door. The windows had to be blocked off because the flashes from their cameras were distracting.
“Good,” she answered, forcing strength into her voice.
Beth looked ravishing in a bright yellow dress that made her dark coloring look even more beautiful. Beth frowned. “Come on, spill it. I know you and I know when you’re scared. You’re scared right now.”
Too many high emotions had been colliding through Felicity these past few days and seeing her friend again, hearing the caring, thoughtful words brought tears to her eyes.
“Hey now! I’ll have none of that. It’s your wed—I mean mating day or whatever you call it.” Mumbling, Beth snatched a box of tissues off the table and thrust them out to her. Felicity took one, her smile wobbling.
“God, I missed you,” Felicity said.
“I missed you too.”
Felicity eyed her friend, welcoming the distraction from her thoughts. “You look good.” She looked better, much better than the last time she saw her. The pain of having her fantasy shattered was finally beginning to fade.
“I feel good. I’m done with all...that. I’m done, moving on. I’ve actually gone on a few dates with someone.”
Felicity glanced at the clock on the wall, noted the time—ten ‘til. Ten minutes until Diane came back for her and walked her into that room where the rest was up to her. Felicity’s eye twitched. Breathing in quick breaths, she buried her face in a tissue as she got control of herself. “With who?”
“A man I met leaving the bookstore. We actually bumped into each other. My books went flying. We ran into each other so hard, I fell back and landed on my ass.”
Felicity ran her nails up and down her arm. “Really?” Damn. The itch only seemed to spread the more she tried to make it go away. In no time she was scratching the other arm where invisible little bugs seemed to be marching up and down her skin.
“Really. Of course, that may also be because the man’s built like...I don’t even know how to describe it. Like a bull?” She looked at Felicity encouragingly.
“Don’t look to me for help. I don’t know what he looks like.” She chuckled but with her dry throat, it turned into a hard, wracking cough.
“Well he’s tall, like really tall and built like an ox. Just all that packed muscle in his shoulders and arms and chest. The kind I could climb and hold on to for dear life.”
Felicity shook her head, an erratic motion. “That doesn’t even make sense.”
“Whatever,” Beth said. “He asked me for my number right there and after I picked my jaw off the floor I gave him my email instead. He did email me and we hooked up, had a great first date, and then another one, and we’re set to go out again this weekend.”
Felicity smiled for her friend but it was a little too bright, a little too forced. “I’m so happy for you. You deserve to meet a nice guy and go out and have a good time, and who knows, maybe find some love along the way.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
A brisk knock sounded at the door. Felicity jumped about a foot in the air at the sound. She came down hard, her high heel nearly slipping on her train. Beth raised a brow at her little antics and went to answer the door. Diane Blackmoore waited outside. “It is time.”
Felicity followed Diane down the hall and tried to keep her breathing steady lest someone hear it. She could not have anyone questioning her, doubting her decision, even if she felt as twitchy as if she’d been shot with electricity.
The voices had gone silent in preparation for the arrival of the male and his bruid. Felicity wrung her hands wishing she had something to hold in them. Maybe that was why humans carried flowers down the aisle, so the women would have something to wring.
“So, what’s his name?” she asked Beth.
Diane flashed her a curious look and Felicity nodded at Beth who walked on her other side. Beth smiled a warm and happy look. “Jay.”
Felicity cocked a brow. “Jay and Beth. I like it.” Get control of yourself, Fel.
The rolling, twisting bundle of snakes squirming in her belly writhed faster. She could see the doorway now, the two doors which Dom’s bodyguard held open. She smiled tentatively at Griffin. The big man winked at her and with that some of the nerves dissolved, the snakes slowing their twining movements.
“What’s wrong?”
Felicity blinked then looked to her right. Diane was watching her with a knowing look.
Felicity cleared her throat. “Sorry?”
“You stopped walking, dear. Is everything well? I know how nervous I was when I was mated.”
“Yes, nervous. Yes.” That’s all she could say so she didn’t bother trying to make the words pretty.
Diane nodded then told Beth to go find her seat. Turning back to Felicity, Diane smiled. It was the first real, sincere smile Felicity had ever seen on the woman. It had a kind, motherly quality to it. “I’ve been in your shoes and I know how you feel. All I can say is that when I crossed that threshold many, many years ago and saw my mate waiting for me standing tall amongst our peers, proud to claim me, every bit of nervousness I felt withered away.”
“Really?”
“Absolutely.”
“Is Helena in there?”
Diane stiffened but shook her head. “I was told to keep posted on her arrival but as of yet she isn’t here. I suspect she wouldn’t actually try to enrage Dominic’s temper. She probably said what she did to get a rise out of you, to make you look a fool or worry or some such thing. Don’t let her get to you. This night is about you and my son.”
“Right, of course, I’ll do that.” She was excited about mating with Dominic. However, the slithering bundle of nerves continued to torment her stomach, and she still had to control her breathing.
Diane gave her hand a squeeze then walked into the hall with her head held high leaving Felicity alone.
Deep breaths, in and out.
Felicity turned her back on Griffin and the other guard, one whose name she could not recall. Rick?
She turned away from them, away from the hall. Why was she so nervous? She had jitters in her stomach, her arms itched like something had bit her, and her eye ticked again. It felt so much like that time after she’d been in a car accident, when she’d gathered her bearings and could feel the wind blowing through the hair on her arms, hear the rubber of tires rolling against the concrete as cars drove by—everything had become sharper, more clear in a way she’d never experienced before. Now she felt that same sensation.
The pulse at her neck thudded hard. She could feel it moving, pulsing against her thin skin like it wanted to beat its way out.
Why wasn’t she marching in there right now and claiming her mate? Why did she feel...doubt?
She swallowed over the dry, cottony lump in her throat.
Then she started walking. One strong voice called out after her. Heart hammering in her chest like an incessant knock, she did not slow her stops, did not look over her shoulder.
Steps turned into a long stride which turned into running. Not towards the hall and down the long pathway that led to where the man she loved stood, but away from him. Away from it all.
Fear and panic clogged her throat, urged her and she listened, flying out a side door and into a crowd of surprised reporters. There was a heavy pause where everyone stopped with mouths agape before cameras lifted to their faces and started clicking away. Bright white flashes pulsed in her face making her eyes water. The questions came next, thrown at her like hard rocks, digging the self-inflicted wound deeper.