“You’re allergic to cats.”
“Which makes it even sadder!”
Candace set her ice cream aside and shifted on the sofa to face Evelyn. “You’re never going to be a crazy cat-lady. Not if I can help it.”
Evelyn huffed and took a huge bite of ice cream, then winced as it gave her a headache. When it passed, she said, “Your help landed me with my fifth-worst date ever.”
Candace’s eyes widened. “Really? Worse than the dragon guy?”
“Way worse. As soon as we sat down, Tobias started talking about a yacht trip he’s taking with his parents. He went on and on about the places he would visit and the celebrities he would meet, and then he just…stared at me.”
Candace fidgeted. “In a good way or a creepy way?”
“I thought it was a good way. You should have seen the admiration in his eyes; it was almost embarrassing. I finally asked him what he was thinking, and he told me I looked pretty.”
“Awww. That’s adorable.”
A chill ran down Evelyn’s spine. “It would have been, but then he told me I reminded him of his mother.”
Candace’s jaw dropped. “You’re not serious.”
Evelyn pinched her eyes shut. “And then I spazzed out and knocked my drink over. It got all over his fancy clothes, and when I tried to help him, I knocked his dessert onto his shoes.”
After several moments of silence, Candace said, “It’s better this way. My backup guy isn’t rich, but at least he’s not a momma’s boy.”
Evelyn turned slowly, and her eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, ‘backup guy?’”
Candace took a sudden interest in her fingernails and stared down at them as she spoke. “Did I say that? I meant ‘next guy.’ I think I know someone who’s way better for you than Tobias.”
Evelyn’s eyes narrowed, and she held the spoon in her mouth for several seconds before saying, “Go on.”
“He’s a massage therapist in Lexington. At my last appointment, my usual masseuse called in sick, so he filled in for her.”
“Alright. What’s wrong with him?”
Candace rolled her eyes. “There’s nothing wrong with him.”
“There has to be. Otherwise, why didn’t you set me up with him instead of Tobias?”
Candace grinned sheepishly. “Okay, fine. He’s a backup guy. I’d already set you up with Tobias, and I gave him your number just in case things fell through today.”
Evelyn groaned, dropped her ice cream on the coffee table, and began pacing the room. “You gave him my number? Without my permission?”
“He asked me if I had a boyfriend, and I lied and told him ‘yes.’ Then I felt bad for him, so I told him how very single you were and showed him your picture.”
Evelyn gripped her head as if it was about to explode. “You showed him my picture?”
“He seemed like a really sweet guy,” Candace said defensively. “And he said you looked beautiful.”
“Well, he was probably just being nice because he definitely hasn’t called me. When did this happen?”
“Yesterday.”
Evelyn slowed her pacing and crossed her arms. “How old is he?”
Candace shrugged. “Thirty-ish.”
“And he’s butt-ugly, isn’t he?”
Her friend let out a tired sigh. “He’s cute. Definitely better looking than Tobias.” Evelyn gave her a look that said, “That’s not saying much,” so she grabbed her phone and searched for the spa’s website.
“Here,” Candace said, tapping a photo and holding out the phone. “See for yourself.”
Evelyn accepted the phone and studied the screen. “Cute” was the right word for the man in the picture. His curly hair and wide smile gave him a boyish look, but he had the chiseled jawline and umber skin of a farmer. She scrolled down and read the massage therapist’s name out loud. “Aleksander Cary. Not bad.” She handed the phone back. “I’ve dated worse. If he calls, I’ll—”
She stopped short and smushed her face between her fingers. “Craaap. I don’t have my phone! And there’s no way I can face Tobias today. Or this month. Maybe I should buy a new phone.”
Candace sprung to her feet, strode into the kitchen, and snatched her keys off the wall. “Never fear, wee lamb. I will rescue your phone from the clutches of that monster.”
Evelyn tried not to smile, but she couldn’t help herself. She followed Candace through the front door, grabbing her high heels as she passed. “I’m coming with you.” She padded barefoot down the stairs. “But only for moral support.”
3
Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman’s best friend. When Candace and Evelyn arrived at Tobias’s home—or rather, his parents’ home—Candace slammed her Hyundai Elantra into “park” and ran to the front door. Evelyn remained behind, reclining her seat to stay out of sight and silently cheering her friend on. But even from her hiding place, she could hear Candace shouting. Her curiosity got the better of her, and she peeked over the dashboard.
Tobias was standing in the doorway, and Candace was poking him in the chest. The shouting continued for thirty more seconds, then Tobias disappeared into the house. He returned a moment later, holding Evelyn’s phone and purse in a pinch-grip as if they were radioactive. Candace snatched them up, spun around, and gave Tobias the finger as she made her way to the car.
Evelyn ducked out of sight and grinned when her friend opened the driver’s side door. Candace dropped Evelyn’s possessions into her lap and put the car in gear. She kept an angry expression on her face until they left the winding driveway, then she burst into laughter.
Inclining her seat, Evelyn latched onto Candace’s arm and squeezed tight. “Candace, that was amazing. He looked like he was going to piss his thousand-dollar pants.”
Candace brushed an imaginary speck of dust off her shoulder. “All in a day’s work. No need to thank me.”
Evelyn clasped her phone tight, staring at her reflection in the blank screen. “You don’t think Aleksander tried to call, do you?”
Candace wheeled the Elantra around a turn and cast a scathing glance at her friend. “I don’t know. You tell me.”
Evelyn’s fingers traced the unlock button. She was riding a wave of poetic justice, and she didn’t feel like coming down just yet. If she opened the phone and didn’t have any missed calls from Aleksander, it would be one more disappointment to add to her day.
Spying her friend’s hesitation, Candace said, “Give me that,” and stole the phone. She unlocked it, revealing a message in the center of the screen: One Missed Call. Before Candace could comment, the phone vanished into thin air and magically reappeared in Evelyn’s fingers. She smiled and waited for the report.
Evelyn entered her passcode, retrieved the call log, and frowned. “He called…twice. One missed call and one received call.”
Candace pumped the brakes and muttered, “Tobias. You want me to turn around?”
Evelyn thought for a moment, then shook her head. “No. I think it’s better if I just pretend today never happened and Tobias doesn’t exist.” She took a deep breath, tapped the phone, and closed her eyes.
“Put it on speaker,” Candace said.
Evelyn swatted the air, then plugged one ear and held the phone tight to the other.
A deep voice answered after the second ring. “Hello?”
“Uh, hi.” Evelyn’s voice cracked. She rapped her knuckles against her forehead twice, cleared her throat, and said, “This is E-Evelyn. I had a missed call from this number.”