She removed her clothes and surveyed herself in a mirror. Griselda’s remark about her figure rankled in her memory. “I look just like a boy,” she thought. This was untrue, and if she had been more intimately acquainted with boys she would have known it. “Gristle is right; I’m stringy,” thought she. This also was untrue. Slim she undoubtedly was, and breastless and economical in the rear, but she was not stringy, and there was promise of better things to come. But Freddy was not in a mood to be satisfied with herself, and as she put on her pyjamas and jumped into bed she wondered what Daddy would say if she suggested that in a year or two she should become a postulant in an Anglican nunnery. Somewhat illogically she broke off this train of reflection to read the large illustrated Rabelais which she had abstracted from the library. She found it very good fun, and made a mental list of several abusive terms to use in her next quarrel with Griselda.
Her older sister was likewise preparing for bed. There were four young men in Salterton all of whom were wishing, that evening, that they could take Griselda Webster out. But as none of them knew her very well, and as her beauty and her father’s wealth frightened them, and as they feared that they might be rebuffed if they called her, and as they were convinced that such a girl must have all her evenings spoken for months in advance, none of them had done anything about it, and Griselda, at eight o’clock, was in the bathtub.
Long baths were one of her indulgences. She liked to lie in a scented tub, refreshing the hot water from time to time, smoking cigarettes, eating chocolates, and reading. She liked romances of two kinds; if she were not reading Anthony Trollope, whose slow, common-sense stories, and whose staid, common-sense lovers she greatly admired, she liked spicy tales of the type which usually appear in paper-bound copies, in which bishops are forced to visit nudist camps in their underwear, in which men are changed into women, in which bachelors are surprised in innocent but compromising situations with beautiful girls. Hers was a simple but somewhat ribald mind.
She shifted her hips so that the warm water swept over her stomach, which had grown a little chilly. She prodded a chocolate clinically, and as it appeared to be a soft centre she popped it into her mouth. She turned a page of The Vicar of Bullhampton. Peace settled upon St Agnes’ for the night.
At five minutes to six o’clock Hector Mackilwraith left the YMCA and walked briskly toward the Snak Shak. This restaurant, in spite of its name, was pretentious, and appealed to the students of Waverley by a display of unnecessary electricity, unceasing popular music played by a machine which lit up like a baboon’s rump with red, blue and green lights, and by quaintly scholarly touches in its decoration. One of these was a wall-painting of a goggle-eyed gnome, just identifiable as Shakespeare’s Puck, which appeared over the soda fountain and food counter; from the mouth of the gnome emerged a balloon in which the words “Lord, what foods these morsels be” were written in Old English lettering. The Snak Shak was not elegant or restful, but it was fairly clean, and it was possible to eat a three-course dinner there for sixty-five cents if you bought meal tickets by the ten dollar book. Hector was one of its most faithful supporters.
A man enters a familiar building in quite a different manner from that which he shows when going to a new place. Hector’s steps took him to the door of the Snak Shak so neatly that he was able to seize the handle and enter without losing momentum. He walked to his accustomed stall, at the farthest possible distance from the baboon-rump music-box, hung up his raincoat and hat, and sat down to read his newspaper. In time his accustomed waitress—she had been with the Snak Shak for almost three months—came to him and greeted him with the friendliness which she reserved for “regulars” who never “tried to get fresh”.
“G’devening,” said she. “Terrible out, eh?”
“Yes. A wet night.”
“Yeah. Terrible. Juice or soup?”
“The mixed vegetable juice, please.”
“Yeah. And then?”
“Hm. The chicken a la king?”
“I’ll tell you—not so good tonight. The hamburger’s good.”
“All right.”
“Heavy on the onions as usual, eh?”
“Thank you. Yes.”
“What pie?”
The coconut chiffon.”
“I was bettin’ with myself you’d say that. You got a sweet tooth, y’know that?”
“Do you think so?”
“Yeah. And why not? You’re not so fat. What’s your beverage?”
“Tea, please. With two teabags.”
“OK. Right away.”
Hector turned once again to his paper. He was usually a methodical reader, taking in the world news, the local news, and the editorials, in that order, and then glancing briefly at the rest. He always finished by reading all the comic strips; he did not particularly enjoy them, and persuaded himself that he read them only in order to know what his pupils were reading; but the fact was that they had become an addiction, of which he was rather ashamed.
Tonight his reading progressed slowly. He read the same report twice without realizing it, for his mind was elsewhere. Hector was debating a weighty matter within himself. He was trying to make up his mind whether he should ask for a part in The Tempest.
To many people, such problems are simple. If they want something they set to work to get it, and if they do not want it they leave it alone. But Hector was a schoolteacher, and a teacher of mathematics at that, and he prided himself upon the orderliness of his thinking. He was as diligent as any Jesuit at arranging the arguments in every case under Pro and Contra and examining them thoroughly. When at last he recognized what was troubling him he folded his paper neatly and laid it in the seat by him, and drew out his black notebook, a book feared by hundreds of pupils. On a clean page he wrote his headings, P and C, and drew a line down the middle. Quickly, neatly—for this was his accustomed way of making up his mind, even upon such matters as the respective merits of two Chinese laundries—he wrote as follows:
HM Been treasurer Little Theatre HM teacher—do nothing foolish
6 yrs—served LT well—deserves
well of LTCouldn’t take part of lover, clown
or immoral person—plays full of
HM Probably as gd an actor as these—Shakes often vulgar
most of LT crowd
Heavy demands on time—do
Feel need of augmented social nothing to forfeit respect of pupils,
life—all work no play, etc. have colleagues, etc.—not in position
enough money to take place with to entertain—Invading field of
best of LTEnglish Dept. ?—remember
specialist certificate in maths
Be fun to wear costume, false
whiskers, etc.—Shakes v. cultural
He considered the page before him. The waitress brought his meal, all on one tray, and he drank his mixed vegetable juice absently, as he pondered. He was deep in his problem as he attacked his hamburger and vegetables, but he reflected momentarily that with onions he should have ordered a glass of milk, to kill the smell on his breath; still, he was not going anywhere that evening, and there was no need to consider himself; he liked the smell of onion. But he pulled himself up sharply: that was slovenly thinking and slovenly living; a gentleman, his mother had often said, was a man who used a butter knife even when alone. A slovenly action, thrice repeated, has become a habit. He called the waitress and ordered the milk. To thine own self be true, etc.; Shakes.