We're in New York, and Lori is quite prepared with a car to drive us around and a list of stores for us check out. She says, "Jade, if you can't find a dress here, you're doomed."
"Nothing like a little bit of pressure to start my day," I mutter back.
"You didn't get coffee yet, did you? You're always cranky without coffee. Did you eat breakfast?"
"Um, no." She sighs at me. "Don't give me that sigh. I'm going to try on wedding dresses! I needed to look perfect, so I spent a lot of time getting ready." I lean over and whisper in her ear, so the mom's can't hear. "Plus, Phillip would NOT let me out of bed. He's insatiable."
Lori giggles with me then asks the driver to stop at the next coffee shop. She comes back with a latte and a chocolate chip scone for me. I'm happily sipping coffee and thinking about how Phillip looked when I left this morning. All those sexy muscles lying there naked, twisted up sheets down by his feet. The way his eyes sparkled when he spoke. How I can't even remember what he said because I kept thinking how I just wanted to take my clothes off and pounce back on top of him. I think about what I would've done. How I would've run my hands across his broad shoulders. How I love the way his abs feel in my hands. How muscular his butt feels when he's.........
His mom interrupts my thoughts by shoving a file folder in front of me. Mrs. Diamond tells me they clipped out some photos of dresses they thought I should try on.
I thank them and flip through the photos, not really looking at them. My mind is back to sexy places.
We went to a few boutique stores. I tried on some dresses, but nothing wowed us.
Around noon, I'm introduced to a bridal consultant named Hillary. She's short, blonde, and extremely peppy. I like her enthusiasm right away.
Hillary says, "I'm going to steal the bride away for a little while. Enjoy some champagne, and we'll be back out looking like a bride."
Hillary leads me back to a dressing room, where we sit down. "So tell me about the groom."
"His name is Phillip Mackenzie, and I've known him my whole life. He was my best friend growing up, my college roommate, and we got engaged a couple months ago on our first date."
"Wow, really? I've never met anyone that got engaged on their first date. So how about your budget?"
I tell her my dress budget. She nods and says, "Have you tried on any dresses?"
"I've tried on about thirty."
"And have you liked any of them? Do you have pictures of dresses you like?"
"I have a stack that people think I should try on. I don't want to waste our time though. I know that none of them are the one."
"Okay, why don't you tell me what you liked or didn't like about the dresses you've tried on."
"I hate hoop skirts. I don't want anything heavy. I wanna be able to move."
"Got it. Now describe to me how you want to look on your wedding day."
"No one has asked me that question before."
"Well, I'm going to help you find the perfect dress. It's my job to ask the right questions."
I think about how I want to look. "I wanna look timeless. I want my daughter to look back at my dress twenty years from now and not know when I got married. I kinda want to look like Grace Kelly. Not her wedding gown, that was too lacy. More like the fifties classic strapless dresses. But no, that's not really right either because I don't want to look dated. I definitely want strapless. I want the dress to be soft and light, so I can move around in it. I thought I wanted something very tailored and plain, but when I try on dresses like that, they don't seem dressy enough, so I think I need a little bling. I know most brides probably come in and know exactly what they want. Like they want to look a certain way, but all I want is for Phillip to think I look amazing. I did try on a dress of each silhouette. Everyone thinks I look best in a strapless mermaid style. I sort of feel like a bridal failure."
"You're not a failure. You just haven't found the right dress yet. You've told me a lot about what you want and don't want. I'm going to pull a few dresses. Be right back," she says in a very chipper voice.
I say a silent prayer that Hillary can figure me out.
That today I will find my dress.
While I'm waiting, my phone buzzes. I pull it out of my purse.
Danny :) XXX theme wedding requires a XXX bridal dress. Hint:
Following is a photo of a woman that you'd assume is a bride, since she's wearing a veil and dressed in all white. I'd say she's probably a very naughty bride. She has on a white lace corset, sheer lace thong, fishnet thigh highs, and patent leather platform heels. Only the classiest shoes for this bride. Over all of this is a sheer robe. The robe is sporting a feather collar, or maybe it's a white boa, I'm not sure. She also has extremely big hair, bright red lipstick, and a cherry halfway in her mouth. Maybe that's a new wedding dessert I should consider.
Ha!
Me: OMG! Veryyyy classy!
Danny :) If you decide you wanna try on dresses like this. One that will fit your theme, ditch the women and let the best man help you pick it out. I'm told it's one of my duties to see my groom is well taken care of.
Me: You're a goofball. Are you with Phillip and the dads?
Danny :) Yeshhh :) and Mac likeyyyyyy.
Me: Are you drinking?
Danny :) I have a game tomorrow, so not really, but everyone else is. Lori says brides sometimes wear a second dress to the reception, and it should fit your theme. So we ordered this for you. You can thank me later.
Me: More like Phillip will be thanking you. Tell him it definitely fits our honeymoon theme.
Danny :) You have a honeymoon theme?
Me: Maybe.....
Danny :) Phillip says you do, but won't tell me. He also said to tell you this outfit reminds him of whipped cream. What does that mean?
Me: Well, we can't use XXX for the wedding, so......and ask him about the whipped cream. OMG, Danny, it was so HOT! Just don't let the dads hear!
Danny :) I'm jealous.
Hillary walks back in the room with four dresses. There must be something about having a complete stranger see you practically naked that makes you feel like you can talk to her about anything. While she's getting me all done up, I find myself telling her that it's kinda hard for me to be picking out a dress without my mom. I tell her how my mom loved bling and how I used to fight against it, but the older I get, the more I don't mind just a little bit of sparkle. For some reason, it makes me feel more like her.
The first dress she puts me in is actually quite pretty. I know for sure, it's not THE dress, but it's probably the first one that I don't dislike. It's a strapless mermaid style dress. It has just a bit of bling across the waistline, but the rest of it is pretty plain. Like the simplicity of the design is what makes it gorgeous.
I show Lori and the moms.
"This isn't the one," I say, "but it's very pretty, don't you think?"
Lori loves me in strapless, and the moms love the mermaid style. Maybe we're getting somewhere. Maybe today I will find a dress.