“Oh, but my dear baron, is that really nice to surprise people so unexpectedly? But my dear God, what time is it? Your watch must be fast, it could not possibly be eleven o'clock. Oh, dear Lord have pity upon me. It is all my fault. Oh, I really hate myself for this. I am terrible… awful, am I not? Oh, you may as well admit it. Oh, how awful that you have to catch me red-handed with my untidiness. But I want you to know that I have not slept a wink since last night. Right now, this very moment, I have the most terrible migraine; it is driving me to distraction. But it does not matter, the joy to see you again will surely make it go away. Come, Lisette, be quick. Serve the chocolate. And don't forget, I don't want it too thin.”
My orders were carried out quickly. And while our noses inhaled the sweet aroma which permeated the entire mansion, and we sipped from the delicious, frothy liquid, I was told that my jeweler wanted to see me.
“What? Why, these terrible interruptions!” I exclaimed. “Don't you know that I am not at home to anybody? Oh, these servants, it makes absolutely no difference to them what the instructions are, they always want it their own way. It makes me furious… But, if you don't mind, my dear baron, now I am really curious to find out what he wants. Lisette, show the gentleman in… Ah, good morning, my dearest Monsieur de la Frenaye! If I may ask, what brings you here so early in the day? How is your business? I make a bet that you have something you want to show me.”
“Madame,” he answered, “allow me to interrupt you. Since I happened to be in the neighborhood, I took the liberty to presume that you might want to see this beautiful cross which was ordered by the wife of a banker from the Place Vendome. And without wanting to be presumptuous, I may say that it is one of the most delicate and precious pieces of jewelry that has ever been made.”
“You are really very courteous, Monsieur de la Frenaye, not to forget your friends. I really appreciate this token of your attentiveness. So allow me to have a look at it, since you seem to be so proud of it… Oh, Baron, look how beautiful! This setting is simply gorgeous. I have hardly ever seen such a beautiful piece of jewelry. Look at those stones, aren't they cut with a perfect brilliance? Don't you think that their sparkle is almost magical? Those impudent banker's wives nowadays wear such a beautiful thing and display a grandeur which is neither becoming nor fitting for them. To be very frank with you, I think it is a shame that a woman of that kind should own such a splendid jewel… Please, do tell me, how much is it worth?”
“Madame,” answered de la Frenaye, “it is 8,000 francs and that is as low as I can go.”
“If I had the money,” I went on, “I simply could not stand the idea that you were to take it out of my house again.”
“But you know, Madame, that everything I have can be yours at your beck and call. For less than you believe…”
“No! Absolutely not. It is not my habit to buy on credit.”
The baron, who, as I had anticipated, was delighted to find such a beautiful opportunity to pay me court, took the cross, paid the jeweler immediately 60 louis d'or in cash and wrote a promise to pay the remainder the next day. I played the part of the girl who is upset because she is modest and unselfish, up to the hilt.
“Now, really, dear Baron, that is the height of absurdity! That is truly overstepping the boundaries of generosity. I will be very frank with you. You did not give me any pleasure with such a gesture. I believe there is nothing wrong with accepting some small knick-knacks from somebody one likes and to whom a girl is dearly attracted; but, honestly… this is too much! I really cannot make up my mind whether I should accept this.”
While I said these things, the dunce hung the cross around my neck, whereupon I went into my bedroom, deeply in thought. He followed me. And without making him drool too long, I allowed him to cash in on my gratitude at the foot of my bed for the 8,000 francs he had just spent; without losing the illusion of my natural tenderness so that the blockhead firmly believed I liked him for his good characteristics and my attraction for his person rather than for the beautiful gift I had so cunningly wheedled out of him.
I had informed Monsieur de Gr… M… the previous night about my intentions to give the purse of my noble suitor a thorough bloodletting, and he did not fail to show up that afternoon to accept a gift of a beautiful golden snuff box a la Maubois as his broker's fee. Since he did not have to go to the Opera that night, we had dinner together. And both of us had good reason to be very satisfied with our finished business. Cheer was the main course of our dinner. The baron was in such a good mood that he kept paying us his Germanic compliments in the most monstrously mangled language. But the constant wetting of his throat took away the last remnants of what little sound mind he had and we finally had to send him on his way, drunk as a Lord, to his own home.
After this successful test of his generosity, I thought that I would do much better if I did not attach myself to him completely but kept up my role of the passionate woman carrying a torch. This behavior of mine was far more successful than I had dared dream. The month had hardly passed ere I was in possession of a complete service, including all the flatware. Even though it will always remain true that foreign generosities cause hostility rather than gratitude, the friendly act I had to perform almost daily nearly caused me to seriously fall in love with the baron. Habit breeds intimacy, if I may paraphrase, and one becomes accustomed to the slight faults of people who are our daily acquaintances. Even though my German baron was terribly foul-mouthed and stupid, I deemed him gradually less unsympathetic. But, suddenly, a terrible impropriety he committed made him irrevocably repulsive to me.
As I have mentioned before, he was in the habit of drinking quite a lot. And unfortunately he felt himself more attracted to me whenever he was in that condition. So after we had spent one day in a rather uncommunicative manner and I had decided to go to bed after dinner, the stupid glutton stumbled over the door step, lost his equilibrium and fell flat on his face on my parquet floor. In his condition that tumble could not have been harmless and when they tried to lift him up, he did not move and his face was covered with blood. If I had had the opportunity to faint, I would not have hesitated to do so. But he needed help badly so I decided instead to run into my dressing room, and I returned with three or four bottles.
Since I believed the damage to be more serious than it was in reality, I was not just satisfied with washing his face and rinsing his mouth. I also wanted to administer a teaspoonful of wonderwater. But the dirty bum had barely tasted a few drops of it ere he started to heave, and threw up three quarters of his dinner right in my face. I could try in vain, since I would not be able to describe this disgusting scene, so let it suffice to say that I almost heaved blood, that I had to change gowns and almost used four louis d'or worth of perfumes and creams to cleanse myself. I was so furious that I had him thrown out of my home and gave his manservant the message that he could tell his Master never to set foot in my house again.