When we finished eating, Naji pulled out his sword and started sharpening it against the side of a rock he had brought in from the beach with him. It didn't take him long; he was sure practiced at it.
He held the sword up to the fire. It glittered, throwing off little dots of silvery light.
"You had that sword long?" I asked him. Some people, soldiers especially, make a big deal about their swords, and you can get 'em to talk about the things forever. Never been one for that sort of thing myself. A weapon's a weapon.
"I received it when I took my vows." Naji lay the sword over his knees.
"What kinda vows?" Celibacy? I thought, though I didn't say it. Nobody keeps a celibacy vow anyway.
Naji lifted his head. "I'm not supposed to discuss it with outsiders."
"Oh, course not." I picked the sword up by the handle and swiped it through the air a few times. But without the threat of danger, it only reminded me of Tarrin of the Hariri and I dropped it on the floor. Naji gave me one of his looks and slipped it back into its scabbard.
"Can I ask you a question?" I said.
"I'm not divulging any secrets of the Order."
"Not even one?"
Naji narrowed his eyes, and I realized he'd probably been joking, in his way. I took a deep breath.
"Why didn't you want to kill me?"
Naji looked away, toward the fire-shadows flickering across the doorway.
"Well?" I prompted. "Or is that a secret of the Order, too?"
Naji sighed. He leaned back against the wall. He didn't look the least bit like an assassin, what with the firelight and his seaworn clothes. In truth, cause of the scar and his long hair, he looked like a pirate. Even the tattoos reminded me of ocean waves.
"Do you know who the Jadorr'a are?" he asked.
"Assassins."
My answer made him look worn out.
"No, do you know their involvement in the history of the Empire?"
I shrugged. Not much use for knowing history on board a pirate ship.
"They used to prevent wars," he said. "Before the Empire bound together the countries of the desertlands, they were a way to put a cease to the constant fighting between kings. Better to kill one man than allow soldiers to destroy the countryside, raping and burning their way across the desert."
War between countries was something the Confederation didn't much get involved in beyond its own internal squabbling. Though there hadn't been war for a long time, not since I was a little girl, and that was over on Qilar anyway. The Empire had formed long before I was born.
"I don't see what any of this has to do with me," I said.
"It doesn't," Naji said. "That's my point. The Order was always paid for its services, but once the Empire formed, gold lust opened them up for use by any merchant with enough wealth to provide payment."
"Like Captain Hariri?"
"Like Captain Hariri." Naji shook his head. "I joined the Order after my strength manifested itself – after I learned my magic came from darkness and death, not the earth, the way it did for my mother, my brother–"
"You have a brother?"
Naji fixed me with a steely gaze. "My mother sent me away. She said I could harness my darkness into something good, that I could stop the Empire from destroying all the people living under its banners..." He laughed, a short, harsh bark. "I suppose I've done that. Once or twice. But mostly it's errand-running for rich men. I despise wealth."
I didn't say nothing to that. Wealth is power, Papa always told me. Wealth is strength. But I could see where Naji was coming from, too.
"So that's why you didn't want to kill me?" I finally said. "Cause you didn't think it was worth your time?"
Naji looked up at me. "No," he said. "I didn't want to you kill you because I thought it was wrong."
I dunno why, but my face flushed hot at that. Hotter than the fire.
"I won't tell nobody," I said.
"It doesn't matter. No one's going to believe you escaped an assassin."
"A Jadorr'a," I said.
He looked at me again, and I still couldn't read his face none. Not even his eyes.
"Yes," he said. "A Jadorr'a."
And his voice was soft as a kiss.
I woke up to rainfall pattering across the roof. It was awful hard to tell the passing of days here, on account of the cloud cover and the way the sun didn't always rise and set in the same place. The rainfall was constant, though. It was a shame you couldn't keep track of the days through the rain. All I knew was that I'd heard that soft rustle of rain more often than not.
This morning something was different, though. The shack was lit not by the usual faint golden glow of our skin, but by bright blue light. Light the color of northern glaciers.
I sat up, mussing the pile of pine needles and leaves I used for bedding. Naji sat in the corner next to the fire, his eyes and tattoos glowing. My heart pounded. Was he tracking the wizard? Or maybe he was talking to the Order. Maybe they'd have a way to bring us home.
For the first time since we landed on the island, I felt a dizzying twist in my brain that I half-recognized as joy.
A pile of berries was lying next to the hearth, and I ate 'em and checked the water jar. It was empty. I cursed and sat back down on my pile of leaves. Figured he'd think to pick some berries but not go fetch some water. And I was thirsty from sleep.
I watched him in his trance for a while, my head leaned up against the stone walls. He didn't move. Not even his chest rose and fell with his breath. It was eerie, truth be told. I'd never watched him this closely during a trance before. I'd always had better things to do with my time.
"Naji!" I said, waving my hands in front of his face. "I'm thirsty."
Naji didn't move, and the light in the shack didn't change.
"If you don't come out of that trance I'm gonna go fetch water myself."