I hate that Josie’s even mentioned the wreck. Every time I picture that semi hitting Harper in her truck, I want to vomit.
“No,” I say. “We both need some space.”
“You mean you did.”
“Josie…”
“Don’t Josie me.” She lowers her voice and shakes her head. “Can you not be such a guy for a minute?”
“I am a guy.”
“Whatever. Are you trying to lose her? Because you’re doing a fine job. She’s lost her husband in the past year. Lost her job. Maybe you decided that you guys couldn’t get along or whatever, but at least you could act like a man and not hide over here.”
“These doors open both ways. If she wanted to be friends, she’d come over. I told her I wanted us to be friends. She hasn’t been knocking.”
“What a cop out.” Josie gets off the barstool and throws her bottle in the trash. I figure she’s about to leave since I’m not agreeing with everything she says.
She turns to me and grabs her phone. “If you really want to be her friend, you’ll help me with something.”
I hesitate. “Maybe.”
“It’s Harper’s birthday on Friday. She won’t leave her apartment and I want to get her to Dastardly’s. Food and cake. That sort of thing.”
“What do you want me to do? Take her there?”
“No. I’ll bring her. She won’t come with you.” Josie’s tone is light and she’s not trying to be shitty.
Still, I’m hurt that my sister is right. I don’t know that Harper would go anywhere with me. The trip home from the hospital had been painfully cold and impersonal. “OK, give me an assignment.”
“I’ll email you. There’s a list of stuff I need done. I can’t leave the store to run all my errands and you have time.”
“What? You have as much time as I do. I’m not your honey-do. You need to find one of those.”
“You don’t want to make Harper’s birthday nice?”
“Hold on. I said I would. Text or email the list to me.”
“Dane said we can have the back room at Dastardly’s. You’ll be able to store decorations in the closet there. OK?” She sticks her bottom lip out at my expression. “Pleeeeasse.”
“Why couldn’t I have a brother? Remind me why I let you come in and boss me around?”
“’Cause you love me.” Josie smirks and heads for the door.
“Yeah. Guess so.”
She ignores my grumbling and pauses with her hand on the knob. “I think you should tell Tori I’m going to find myself a nice Mafia boyfriend to take her out if she even thinks about pulling any shit again. Capiche?”
“I’ll tell her today.”
“You do that. I’ll send her a copy of The Godfather if that’ll make it clear.”
“Out. Go.”
Josie beams at me over her shoulder as she leaves.
I grab my phone and open the messaging app. My phone is filled with missed calls, voicemails, and unanswered texts from Tori. I’d come close to blocking her number.
Me: I’d like to talk to you
Tori: WHEN? <3
Me: Now if you can get away
Tori: 2:00?
Me: Yes
Tori: YOUR PLACE?
Me: No
Tori: :(
Me: Tonton Park
Tori: K <3 <3 <3
Tori pulls her car in beside mine in the lot. I’ve had time to let my anger simmer to a low boil. She waits for me to get out before she exits.
“What a nice surprise.” Tori leans in and hugs me.
I don’t have time to react before the contact is over. Once, I’d have given both nuts and a pinkie finger for this woman. The hug is meaningless now. No thrill, no need, nothing.
“Let’s walk.” I don’t trust my anger unless I can rid myself of the pent-up frustration about what she’s done. I probably won’t resort to yelling if we are around other people.
She looks down at her high heels. Tori always dresses, even for work at the salon, as if she’s going clubbing. When we dated, it was a fact that amused me and made me hard for her at the same time. But I see now that she works hard to advertise herself.
I’m tempted to choose a walking trail as punishment.
“I guess I can. If I trip, you’ll have to catch me,” she says.
I respond by pointing to some kids’ playground equipment. “OK, then. We’ll sit.”
Tori’s frowning. I’m not exactly falling into her plan for a nice, afternoon rendezvous. I sit on a bench and she takes the spot next to me.
“You and I need to talk about some things that have happened.”
“I agree. I want you to know I’ve made a decision.” Tori smiles at me. It’s a little scary because she looks away and seems shy. It’s not her usual confident fall-under-my-spell smile she usually flashes.
“What about?”
“Us.” Her gaze flicks to mine. “I’m leaving him.”
She says ‘him’ as if he doesn’t have a name. Or maybe she is foolish enough to think I’ve forgotten about her husband.
“Tori—”
She grabs my hand with both hers. “I know you didn’t get the open marriage agreement. It worked for me and James until I met you. That’s why I couldn’t tell you in the first place. I knew you wanted all of me. But I’m leaving James. We can get married. Or live together for a while if that’s what you—”
I pull back in surprise. Her long nails press into my skin. She reminds me of some eagle trying to hold onto its prey. I snatch my hand away. “It’s not going to happen. Ever. If you need to leave him, then do. But don’t do it for me because I keep telling you we’re over.”
“I know I hurt you. I know and I promise I’ll never do it again. But you can’t give up on us. I know you loved me.”
I shake my head. “It’s all in the past. I don’t know how many ways I can tell you. You have to put the notion out of your head that we’ll get back together. We can’t go back. You told too many lies. And that hurt, Tori. It did. But I don’t want us anymore.”
“I know you don’t believe me this time. But I swear I can prove myself to you.”
“Tori. Stop it. I’m not in love with you.” I hold my knuckles against my forehead to stop myself from slamming them into the park bench. Anything to make her shut up. “I didn’t come here for this. I came to tell you to leave Harper alone.”
“What?”
“Don’t talk to her. Don’t ask about her. Don’t breathe the same air she does.”
“Or what? You’ll do what? I know you turned to that little whore because you were lonely. But you can’t just replace me. We have something together.”
I stand and point at Tori. “Be careful. You don’t have the right to breathe her name. Don’t make me do something drastic.”
“What does that mean? Drastic?” Tori grabs her keys and gets to her feet. “You can’t threaten me.”
A man jogs by and slows down as if he needs to protect Tori. He stops in front of us and I glare at him.
“Is there a problem here?” he asks, putting his hands on his sides and catching his breath.
Tori gives him her sweetest smile. “No. Just a lovers’ quarrel.” Then she turns and walks away.
After returning to my apartment, I consider drinking my way through the afternoon. It’s not really my style, but I’m so pissed that working isn’t in the cards for me. I spend an hour tossing a handball against the wall of my bedroom.
My hand is sore and I don’t feel any better for engaging in the mindless activity. That’s when I remember I’m supposed to be doing some errands for Josie. I check my email to find a very short list: 1. Order a birthday cake, 2. Pick up a birthday card, 3. Buy an eReader. Hell. Harper doesn’t need an eReader. She can borrow books from me.
I pause and feel a little sick. Maybe she’s mentioned getting one and that’s the reason Josie has it on the list.