2016
Amanda cut the top off the pumpkin in six quick slashes, lifted it off, a neat little cap with a curved stem. She went to work hollowing the thing out. She hated the cold, squishy feel of the pumpkin’s insides — “the guts,” as Erin called them.
She thought of that long-ago Halloween, the week before, actually, when Mel had presented her carefully laid-out plan.
“I think it’s totally brilliant, but are you sure it’ll work?” Katie asked.
“Of course I’m sure. She’ll come with us. She’ll do what we say.”
“But don’t you think it’s kind of...” Amanda hesitated.
“Kind of what?” Mel snapped, eyes daring Amanda to continue.
“I don’t know.” Amanda bit her lip. “Think of all the trouble she’s going to get in.”
Mel looked at her, head cocked. “So? Come on, Amanda. It’s not like she doesn’t deserve it. Think about it. Always pestering us all the time. Being so fucking weird.”
“And don’t forget, the bitch broke into your house and stole your old clothes!” Katie added. “She’s probably, like, all obsessed with you or something. Gross. Plus, it will be hilarious and you know it.”
Amanda frowned.
“What if she tells?” Amanda asked.
Mel laughed. “As if anyone would believe her.”
“As if,” Katie repeated, trying to copy Mel’s laugh.
Mel smiled. “It’s the perfect plan.”
Now, Amanda topped off her wine, told herself to stop it. Stop thinking about that night, stop reliving every moment, every terrible decision she’d made, stop playing the “if only” game. She’d trained herself well over the years. If you spend enough time blocking something out, built sturdy enough walls around it, then it’s almost like it didn’t happen.
Except on Halloween. One night each year it all came back when the parade of Hannahs showed up at her door, when the life-size rag doll dressed as Hannah-beast was cut down from the gazebo in the center of town, a noose around its neck.
Say boo, Hannah.
Now she picked up the knife and started on the eyes of the jack-o’-lantern. Round eyes, she decided. Jim had always done scary slit eyes with dramatic, angry arched eyebrows. A frowning mouth full of jagged, dangerous teeth.
Her pumpkin was going to be happy. Cheerful.
She was finishing up the second eye when there was a knock at the door, another round of trick-or-treaters. Supergirl, a soldier, two zombies, and one Hannah-beast who made sure to say, “Boo!”
Amanda gritted her teeth and held out the bowl.
She’d just started on the nose when there was another knock. A Hannah-beast and a vampire.
Trick or treat.
Boo!
This Hannah-beast was collecting candy in a red plastic gas can with a hole cut in the top. Too goddamned much. Amanda stared at the gas can full of bright candy wrappers, thought of saying something, something adult, like “You’ve taken this too far” or “Don’t you think that’s in poor taste?” But before she got the chance, the girl was gone.
Before she even got to close the door, another group was coming up the walkway toward the porch.
Jesus. Why so many Hannah-beasts this year? It had to be a record.
This time it was a boy dressed as Hannah-beast. He was accompanied by a girl who looked to be dressed as a prostitute, and another boy in a long black trench coat and a ski mask.
This Hannah-beast had visible stubble on his chin under the thin blue makeup. “Boo,” he said, voice bullfrog deep.
Fuck you, Amanda said back to him in her head. She kept her lips tightly pursed so the words wouldn’t find their way out and thrust the bowl of candy in the boy’s direction. He took a whole handful, then was gone, the others trailing behind him.
Come back, slow down, don’t leave us, we love you, Hannah-beast.
“You’re only supposed to take one!” Amanda shouted at him. He gave her the finger behind his back, not even bothering to look at her.
Amanda closed the door, refilled her wine (the bottle was almost empty now), and went back to the pumpkin. She was further along with it than she’d realized. The nose was done and had a delicate triangle shape. Now for the mouth. A happy pumpkin needed a big grin. Some chunky teeth maybe. Cheerful, but not too goofy. She picked up the paring knife and started at the left corner of the mouth, working her way down, doing a light line at first, just breaking the skin to get the design roughed out, then going in deeper.
The pumpkin was soon smiling back at her.
“Hello, you,” she said to it, thinking, Won’t Erin be pleased?
Job well done, Mom.
A shadow passed in front of the kitchen window. Amanda glanced up just in time to see a figure moving by the living room window — someone in a cape with a black eye mask and a rainbow wig.
“Fuck!” Amanda jumped back off the kitchen stool, the knife slipping. She’d cut herself at the base of the thumb. There was blood on the mouth of the pumpkin, covering its lower teeth. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”
There was a knock at the door.
“Trick or treat!” voices called. Amanda wrapped a kitchen towel around her hand, went to the door. A Hannah-beast and a slutty devil.
“You’re not supposed to cross the yard!” she scolded. “You’re supposed to stay on the walkway.”
“Um. We did,” said the girl devil.
“You crossed the yard. I saw you from the kitchen.”
“It wasn’t us,” the devil said with a shrug.
“Boo?” the Hannah-beast behind her said, cautiously.
“Fuck off,” said Amanda, slamming the door in their faces, looking down to see the blood had soaked through the towel.
1982
They went from house to house until her pillowcase was heavy, heavy like she really did have a dead dog inside it, which was what the girls were telling everyone they met.
Hannah-beast’s a real monster, that’s for sure! Be careful, or she’ll eat you up! She’s got a dead poodle inside her bag. She’s gonna snack on it later. Yum, yum, yum.
You’re doing so good, Hannah. We love you, Hannah. You’re scaring the shit out of the whole town, Hannah. This is your night. The night of Hannah-beast. Say boo. Boo! Boo! Boo!
They flew through town; Manda was holding her hand as they ran, and Hannah’s heartbeat pounded in her ears. Her face felt tight, her head itched under the rainbow wig, but she was happy, so happy, the feathers of the boa tickling her as she ran, the cape flying out behind her. Everyone in town, all the kids from school, they all saw her. They saw her with the other girls, and they knew... they knew she was something special.
But now it was late. Nearly ten. The streets were clear of trick-or-treaters. Porch lights had been turned off. They sat on the wooden floor of the gazebo in the park, eating candy, trading favorites. Manda didn’t like anything with nuts. Mel hated Mounds bars (which meant Katie did too). They gave Hannah all their peanut butter cups, didn’t even make her trade for them.
“I should go home,” Hannah said. Even though she knew Daddy would be sleeping his bourbon sleep until the alarm went off at seven tomorrow.
“No way! Not yet!” Katie said, grabbing her arm.
“We’ve got one more special surprise, Hannah,” Mel said.
“What’s that?”