She looks around.
‘I wanted to see Sofia’s face before she was buried,’ he is saying, ‘more than anything, but I knew I shouldn’t.’
Suddenly she gets up and, leaving him there, goes back to the house with hurried steps and enters the room she shared with Jeo.
She stands looking at the far corner, the heart beginning to beat painfully in her chest. She raises her hands to her forehead, eyes fixed on the dark brocade of the armchair.
She moves towards it and drops onto her knees and reaches underneath, the open palm skimming the floor as it moves blindly forwards. When her fingertips make contact with the cold metal object down there she almost cries out. She withdraws her hand and looks at the fingers as though expecting to see an injury there.
She reaches out with both hands — as when trying to capture a bird — and grips the toy truck that has been standing stationary against the back wall since the evening of Jeo’s departure.
Her fingers grip the painted wheels so they won’t spin and empty out the energy that had flowed into the toy from Jeo’s body when he wound it up with the key. She stands holding it tightly, locking the gears and cogs of its mechanism.
She is shaking. As a test she releases the pressure on the wheels for a fraction of a second and the wheels turn in the air and she gives out a sound of pain.
At last she places it on the floor and watches it move away from her. She walks alongside it to the other end of the room and then continues out of the door, overtaking and leaving it behind, unable to bear witness to the moment it stops.
12
Mikal sits with his back against the wall in the cold interior, the chain at his ankles rattling with every movement of his body. Never away from his mind, not even for a single second, is the thought of flight. Not since he regained consciousness at the Taliban fort in October.
He doesn’t know where Jeo is.
The last thing he remembers of the fighting on that October day is the battle-torn smoke and a bright burst of poppy before his face. They tied him up with lengths of barbed wire while he was insensible and carried him outside, and when he opened his eyes he couldn’t move and near him a pack of dogs was eating the blood-soaked earth of the fort’s courtyard.
He caught a brief glimpse of the group of American soldiers who had co-ordinated the battle against the Taliban fort. The Americans were now confronted with the corpses of more than a hundred enemy men, and they told their Afghan allies to dispose of them as quickly as possible before they were filmed by a passing satellite.
Mikal became the prisoner of a warlord, who cut off the trigger finger on each of his hands and nailed the two pieces to a doorframe along with those taken from dozens of other captives.
Fearing gangrene, he begged them to extract the bullets from his body, but to no avail. But then two nights later, while he slept, a large group of them came at him with scalpels and blades. A rumour had circulated that the Americans had used solid gold bullets.
He spoke to ask them where Jeo was, asked if they knew someone named Jeo, but received no information.
Carefully he pulls his bandaged hands into his sleeves for warmth. His body is combat-seamed and a little raw elsewhere too, where the bullets went in, where the bullets were taken out. The left arm, that was torn open by a dagger-tip in search of gold, is restricted in its functions — he can touch the right shoulder with it but not the left one.
He must escape and find Jeo and then both of them must go back to Heer.
13
Naheed enters the room where Tara is sitting in a chair.
‘Mother, I am pregnant.’
Tara is attaching a red glass button to a tunic. She completes the stitch she has begun and only then stands up, carefully, placing both her hands on her knees.
‘Mother, did you hear what I said? I am pregnant.’
‘Are you sure?’
The reaction is more muted than Naheed had expected.
‘Yes. I have counted and …’ She shakes her head. ‘It doesn’t matter. I am pregnant.’
‘When was the last time you and Jeo —?’
‘Just before he left.’ Naheed comes and stands in front of her. She links her arms around Tara’s neck and rests her head on her shoulder. Tara embraces her with reluctance.
‘We’ll have to tell Father,’ Naheed says. She is about to part but Tara won’t allow the embrace to be broken, their faces inches away from each other. The woman looks directly into her eyes and says, very firmly,
‘No.’
It is a few moments before Naheed realises what Tara means. She steps away.
‘We are not telling anyone about this.’ Tara moves towards the door and shuts it while Naheed looks on aghast. ‘No one will marry you if you have a child.’
‘I don’t care about that.’
‘I do.’
‘I can’t contemplate even for a second what you are suggesting.’
Tara is standing with her back resolutely against the closed door. But after a while, in a softer voice, she says, ‘I am not suggesting anything. I just think we should wait a little before telling Rohan.’ She doesn’t meet Naheed’s eye as she speaks. ‘Don’t you think he is in enough anguish already? We should wait until completely sure. If it turns out that you are mistaken, you would have raised the poor man’s hopes needlessly.’
Tara moves away from the door.
Naheed sits down on the chair but then shakes her head and stands up.
‘Stay away from the door, Naheed. I can marry you off if you are just a widow. But a widow with a baby — you’ll be alone for the rest of your life.’
Naheed can hardly believe she is living through these moments. Tara strikes her face with such strength that she has to back away and lean against a wall. In the few seconds it takes her to recover, Tara has gone out and bolted the door from the other side.
*
The emergency deepening around her with every minute, Tara tells herself to think fast. She knows a woman who can be of help in this matter.
Hundreds of thousands of poor defenceless Afghanistanis have been murdered by the Americans in cold blood. No one tells you about it … From outside comes the sound of a loudspeaker fixed on top of a van, telling everyone that it is a critical moment for the holy war in Afghanistan, encouraging them to join the jihad. Several such vehicles have been roaming Heer of late, all with the Ardent Spirit flag painted on the sides.
Tara reaches for her burka.
And hundreds of thousands of American soldiers have been killed by the brave Muslim fighters. No one tells you about those either. The Americans are on the verge of defeat so we need just a few more volunteers …
Fastening the ties and buttons of the burka, she goes down the stairs and out into the street. Once again she is taken aback by the silent implacable passing of time, the months and the years. The truth is that she hadn’t noticed Naheed growing up until the day she found a blood-soaked handkerchief in a corner of the room, and her first thought was that a cat must have brought in a dead sparrow and eaten it there. Naheed meanwhile was under the impression that something like a large pimple must have burst somewhere inside her, and was staunching the blood with whatever piece of cloth came to hand.
She visits the woman who lives in Soldier’s Bazaar and then stops to buy a padlock in a narrow alley that is full of jobless young men sitting outside the shops, angry and humiliated, some of them former students at Ardent Spirit, and they look longingly at every girl who passes by, frustration and unemployment causing them to erupt into passion and violence at any time, while the students at the good schools like the one where Basie and Yasmin teach want only to emigrate to Western lands, saying young men like these have made this country uninhabitable.