“Go!” Ms. Hardwick crosses her arms, finally laying down the law.
He pecks Huxley on the lips. “I’ll see you later.” He rushes out the door.
“That is so embarrassing,” Huxley says, not meaning it. “I’m sorry for disrupting class, Ms. Hardwick.”
“It’s all right. Please get to your seat, Huxley. We have a lot to cover today.”
“Sure thing.”
I’ve created a monster.
I make a mad dash to my locker before lunch. I will buy a Snickers at the vending machine and eat it in the library today. Between Huxley and Steve, Val and Ezra, and Bari and Calista, the cafeteria is the last place I want to be. And Snickers have unheralded nutritional value.
When I open my locker, a letter flutters to the floor. It stares at me, threatening me with its contents. Has someone guessed that I’m the Break-Up Artist? I pick it up. This is ridiculous. I can’t be truly worried until I open it.
I can’t stop thinking about you. When can I see you again?—E
I slide to the floor. He wrote it in cursive. There’s something so old-fashioned about it, in a good way. My stomach churns with equal parts ecstasy and dread. Suddenly, I’m no longer craving a Snickers.
I receive the second note of the day in Latin class. This time, I know the author. I rip open the paper football. I’m nervous, but I can’t wait. I have to know what she knows.
My body stops functioning, like cement was poured over it.
“Becca,” Mr. Hoffman asks. “You okay?”
I nod my head yes, even though inside I’m screaming no.
WE NEED TO TALK
I KNOW WHAT YOU DID
I can’t run out of class. She’ll hunt me down.
When the bell rings, she takes my hand and leads me out of class.
“Val, I’m so sorry,” I blurt out.
“Why didn’t you tell me you had a date?”
“Colin Baker?”
“He sounds cute! Dish!”
A tsunami of relief washes over me. My date seems like forever ago. I refresh my memory before describing the guy and date to Val. I omit the broken-nose detail.
“He was a nice guy, but I don’t think he was into me.”
“I know all about that. Don’t worry, Becca. On to the next,” she says. We head through the cluttered corridor as kids race to catch their buses.
“I’m going to hold off for a little while on the dating front.”
“Becca,” she says, wiping a clump of mascara from my lashes. “You have to get back out there. So you had one bad date. Move on. You just have to keep searching, weeding out all the losers. Mr. Right is out there, but you can’t just sit back and hope he finds you.”
And then Val gives me the look, the look Diane warned me about. The look Huxley has perfected into a science. The “oh, you poor, pathetic single girl” look. Wide eyes, pouting lips. One of the biggest joys coupled girls have is giving their single friends dating advice. Just because they lucked out—and it’s luck, nothing more—they believe that makes them dating experts. I’m sure it’s one of the reasons Val worked so hard to land a boyfriend. She’s always wanted to be on the other side of this conversation.
“Val, I just don’t feel like dating right now.”
“That’s not a healthy attitude. There are so many great guys out there. Don’t shut yourself off.”
“I don’t need your advice!”
Val leans back, surprised by my outburst. “Fine, you don’t want my opinion. Let’s get a guy’s point of view. Ezra!”
With preternatural timing, Ezra walks down the hall at that exact moment. I wonder if he’s been watching us, if he saw my outburst. My body clenches, bracing for impact. But I also can’t wait to look at him again.
“Hey,” he says to Val. I never noticed how cute his deep radio-deejay voice sounds.
“Ezra, tell Becca that she needs to get out there and keep dating.”
Ezra and I look at each other, neither of us wanting to talk first. The thumping of my heart in my ears drowns out all ambient noise. It’s just me, Val, Ezra and blurriness.
“I don’t really think that’s my place to say,” he says.
“C’mon, even as a hypothetical,” Val says. “She needs to keep dating. There are a lot of good guys at Ashland.”
“I don’t know,” he says, his eyes drifting up.
“Can we not talk about my dating life?”
“Oh, stop. We’re all friends here.”
Ezra licks his lips. Awkward and adorable, for sure.
“What do you think, Ezra?” I ask. “Are there decent guys at this school?”
“There’s a handful.”
“Exactly, sweetie,” Val says. “Well, more than a handful. Three and a half handfuls.”
“But, you know,” Ezra says. He waves his finger, a grin emerging on his face. “I don’t think you should worry. I think if there is a gentleman interested in you, he will make it known. He wouldn’t let you get away.”
I grip my hanging backpack straps. “You think?”
“I have a feeling. He just has to wait for the right time, or until he can’t wait any longer.”
“It’s all about timing,” Val says.
“Good to know,” I say. I take a calming breath.
“Thanks, honey,” Val says to Ezra. “You’re the best.” She kisses him on the lips softly. Not like how I kissed him.
The only way to get my mind off the current drama surrounding my life is work. Not homework.
My other work.
Since it seems dangling another girl or guy in front of their faces is useless, I have to take a new tack to split up Steve and Huxley. I have to look within. I browse pictures of them online. I can only imagine how much worse school will be now that they’ve patched things up. Everyone will want to be like them. Students will move heaven and earth to find a suitable soul mate. And us singletons will be ostracized even more. I can’t let that happen. I click on a picture of Steve and Huxley in cowboy hats at some carnival, and the conversation I heard between Coach and Steve flashes in my mind. Then I remember Greg Baylor talking up Chandler University at lunch.
A half hour later, I waltz into Diane’s room with my laptop. I’m thinking this will be my last case as the Break-Up Artist, so I better make it count. Bari and Calista are onto me. Who knows if they’ve recruited others.
Diane finishes folding laundry. My mom wants her to do more chores around the house, and watching talk shows doesn’t count.
Without notice, the kiss with Ezra rears its ugly head again. Why do I keep thinking about him at the most random times? Is laundry some kind of subliminal trigger? I remind myself that I kissed my best friend’s boyfriend. I could be stoned to death in parts of the world for that.
Diane snaps her fingers in my face. “What’s gotten into you? Are you still hung up on that Colin guy?”
“No.” Of course not. I have a new boy to fixate on. Is that true? This is how a girl becomes guy obsessed. Will I just keep finding guys to pine for, an addict perpetually in search of my next fix?
“Don’t lie to me, Becca. I’m your sister. I used to change your diaper.”
I have to tell somebody. I have to say what happened out loud, to somebody. And Diane’s right. We are sisters. If I can’t tell her, then who can I tell? Definitely not my best friend.
“I kissed Ezra, Val’s boyfriend.”
Diane snorts when she laughs.
“I’m a horrible person.”
“You’re only a horrible person if you enjoyed it.”
She catches the extra current of shame rippling across my face. “Becca!”
This is bad. Even Diane is taking Val’s side. Every rush of excitement I get from thinking back on it causes an equal and opposite reaction of disgust. What if Val finds out? What if anyone at Ashland finds out? Is there a scarlet letter for bad friendery?