so we can take back spaces
hence why I tie my head with a scarf when I go to those places
you think they care he replied
they don't care about your aunt jemima head
uhmm! even after over twenty years in this country
you still have no other references I said quietly
Oh these ethnic notions I thought enraged
after over twenty years in my country his social limits were intact
for me that was the end of the conversation
after all this was not a teach-in
How do you overturn four hundred years of history
in less than one century?
I've been thinking a lot about writing a poem
about the meaning of the word diplomacy
about how this word is just another four letter word
about how this word is just another way to say
I am going to fuck you
not only are you not going to enjoy it
but when I am done with you
you're sure to say thank you
and like my sistahgurl says you might even pay me for it
in accrued debt interest
Can life exist without ideals
Can life exist without dreams
where does your soul go
when all you do is function
where does your spirit go
when all you do is function
I am only 31 years old and I am getting so cynical
I am trying not to be
I've been reading Shakti Gawain
trying to do creative visualization
trying to imagine
‹ imagine all the people
living life in peace ›
trying to imagine a better world
so I can change my world
so I can change the world
But I have been having a lot of difficulty
I keep remembering my friend B with her three kids
who after a year still can't get a job
its not because she's not qualified
or that she's not trying
but because she's not from the right family
she doesn't have the right connections
and her skin is too damn dark
worse
she doesn't play by the rules of the game
she doesn't do safe cocktail conversations
she was on the sidewalks in the 80s
bringing down the second revolution
she was there on the streets
in front of the palace
in front of ministries
in front of police stations
waiting
waiting to lay claim to dead bodies
no one else would acknowledge for fear of losing their lives
you know in Haiti one often inherits social scars by association
you know in Haiti one often inherits fatal scars by association
scars
wars
social fatal
death by association
tell me how to imagine a better world in this place
tell me how to imagine a better world in this place
where even after operation restore democracy
that came bounded with IMF loans
International Mother Fucking loans
for the structurally adjusted
where the rules of the game are
I am going to fuck you
and you are not going to enjoy it
tell me how do you imagine a better world in this place
tell me how to imagine a better world in this place
where the rules of the game is this diplomacy
where blackness still equals poverty
where even after over 400 years
still too black too strong not French enough
never really French enough
and the new generations don't want to be men
raging youths are now more committed
to seeing blood run
raging youths are now more committed
to seeing blood run
to seeing blood run on sidewalks
just to see blood run through the streets
next to expensive cars
outside of elite-owned stores
because they say they have had enough
jan I pase I pase
jan I mouri I mouri
however it goes down it goes down
however it dies it dies
the end result is still the same
the revolution is not over
‹Call Mr. Martin
tell him to build a coffin›
the revolution is not over they cry as they die
they have had too much adversity
this is the generational gap
don't need to ask them when are they going to grow up
when are they going to grow out of this phase
it is not a phase this is about the game
it was at the university that they learned the rules
through liberation theology they learned they were comrades
it was at the university that they learned
the multiple meanings of the word diplomacy
how you have to be pliable
acquiescent
don't make waves you don't get the perks
no gains if you misbehave like a good little neg
that's what you are being trained to be
a docile body without integrity
like the ancestor who sold my ancestor to the west
depi nan ginen neg pat vie we neg
gede nibo gad sa vivan yo fe mwen
plante mayi m mayi m tounen rozo
rozo tounen banbou
banbou tounen ponya
ponya yo ponyade m gede
How do you overturn four hundred years oj history in less than one century?
And I keep thinking back to my life here
And I keep thinking back to my life right here
in this white power center
ain't no misbehavin' here
in the ivory tower
abounded with liberals and marxist scholars
where liberalism is rhetorically defined
as a floating signifier associated with
the ever-growing pony tail
the peace sign
the old leather jacket from undergrad
the backwards baseball cap
nightly homage to the celestial herb to justify being a function
commitments
commitment to the metaphysics of diversity
commitments
to the environment to animal rights
the pet projects
and pet cultures
signifying signifiers
are recreating structures
these signifying signifiers are recreating structures
these signifying signifiers are recreating bourgeois structures
bourgeois bourgeoisie bougi bouginess
blackness bouginess blackness
contradictions
disjunctures
underplayed identities
downpressing privilege
down
down
down you got to keep it down
sometimes it just wants to rise up
but you gotta keep it down
Shut your mouth!!!!
stuff it in your mouth
just keep your mouth shut and get out
ram it down your throat
deep down your throat
swallow
it
down
you're being forced
to
deep throat
But I don't want to
I don't want to
swallow
it
down
you gotta keep it down
you gotta keep it down
why you have to be down to keep it real
downplaying privilege
little white rebels wanna be niggers
and niggers wanna be niggaz
bourgeois blues
opportunities denied
blackness bouginess
disjunctures?
contradictions?
In Haiti the bourgeoisie funded coups
in Jamaica uptown bougies tried to silence a revolution
but rastafari had a free black mind
so they self-fashioned an everyday resistance
the self-fashioning of an everyday SEXIST resistance
an everyday HOMOPHOBIC resistance
‹don't let them fool ya
or even try to school ya›
blackness bouginess blackness
in the Caribbean bouginess has funded revolutions
little white rebels wanna be niggers
and rebelling niggers wanna be niggaz
these signifying signifiers are just recreating bourgeois structures