“If she called more often than every four years she’d’ve known.”
“And as my grandmother used to say, if you were born with wheels you’d have been a bicycle,” said Cain in a light voice.
“Mom, what in the world’s that supposed to mean?”
She laughed as she watched her son’s face go from an expression of gloom to one of confusion. “I’m not really sure myself, but it seemed like the right thing to say.”
“Come on. I’ll show you where we’re staying for the night. We’ve got a lot to catch up on.” Hayden moved away from Cain for a minute and went to welcome Merrick.
When he did, Cain looked back up at the house, saw her ex-lover standing in the window, and wondered what had brought their talk around to her late sister. Something had, because she knew Emma well enough to know she would use all the time she’d been given to win Hayden over, just like she had won her own heart so many years before.
Cain hadn’t gotten this far in life without being smart enough to suspect this visit was Emma’s first step in a plan to lure Hayden away from the evil Caseys. Cain would find out what had upset him soon enough, but now it was time to get out of this fucking cold. If Hayden wanted to leave, the morning would be soon enough.
“Cain?”
She turned toward the masculine voice and broke into a smile. “Ross, how are you?”
“Fine, thanks for asking. And thank you for letting young Hayden come visit. We’ve really enjoyed having him.” Ross stood at the door of the barn wearing a heavy plaid wool jacket with matching hat.
The flaps that covered his ears looked almost comical, but Cain found herself wishing she had one of her own. “Thanks for having him, Ross. Hayden’s a great kid.” She patted her son on the back.
“Yeah, and now he can go back to the city with the knowledge of how to milk a cow under his belt.”
They all laughed at the statement, making the young man blush.
“Let me show you where you’re bunking down for the night, Cain.”
“I’ll get it, Mr. Ross. Go on inside with Emma.”
Ross quickly moved toward the house, acting as if he knew Hayden and his mother needed privacy.
“What’s up?” The question came out of Cain’s mouth the minute the door of the bunkhouse closed.
“I just want to leave here. Does something have to be wrong?”
Cain took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She had wanted her son to know Emma, but not at the expense of his happiness. Heading down the path of sleepless nights and nightmares again wasn’t high on her agenda. They had gotten through the pain of Emma’s desertion together the first time, and she would always help him. But if it she could avoid a repeat of that cycle, she would do whatever was necessary for Hayden’s peace of mind.
“Right this minute?”
“No, you’re right. No sense spending the night in one of those uncomfortable chairs at the airport, but tomorrow I want to go. I came so you wouldn’t think I was afraid to try, but I don’t want to stay. It’s just…” Hayden turned and faced the front door of the bunkhouse.
“Finish, son. You know you don’t ever have to do anything just to make me happy. Someday I’ll start asking you to do things for the good of the family, but that’s far in the future. The best thing my old man did for me was let me live before he gave me too much responsibility. I love you, Hayden, and if it’s in your best interest I’ll move heaven and earth to give you what you want. If it’s to leave here, you don’t even have to tell me why.”
Cain put her hands on her son’s shoulders. As smart and mature as her kid was, he was still a kid.
“It’s just that you’re my family, Mom. You and Aunt Marie. I don’t need anything or anyone else.” He recognized the long intake of air and slow exhale he heard above his head as a technique Cain used to calm down.
“Did something happen, or did someone tell you something?”
“No, I’m just ready to go home.” The big hands on his shoulders just patted him gently before pulling away. The loving gesture let him know she would give in and leave in the morning, if that was what he really wanted.
Mother and son sat with their guards in the small kitchen in the bunkhouse and ate. Merrick had brought supplies with her, knowing Carol wouldn’t feed them. And considering they were in the middle of some frozen hell, they didn’t have a slew of restaurants to pick from if she wasn’t up to cooking.
A little after ten, Cain settled Hayden down in one of the bunks in the large open room at the center and waited for him to go to sleep. When he was out for the night, she and Merrick shared a look before Cain put on her coat and hat and headed outside. She hadn’t made it halfway toward the front door of the farmhouse when Emma stepped onto the porch.
“He wants you to take him home?”
Cain looked at the empty fields, wondering how people didn’t go completely insane living out here. “Tomorrow. Now you want to tell me what in the hell happened? I didn’t think you two would be glued at the hip when I got here, but the phone call I got this morning surprised me. Hayden doesn’t usually give up on anything so easily.”
“He told me today all the stuff he talks to you about was none of my business, so why should it be any different for me?” Emma was hurting and tried to lash out at the person she blamed for her misery.
Cain just nodded again and turned around, headed back to the bunkhouse. “Please, don’t go. I’m sorry. This isn’t your fault.”
“What do you want from me? I raised him to be strong, Emma. Not to be like me but to choose his own path and be whatever he wants. Hayden’s his own person, and I happen to love the hell out of who he is. He’s better than me and you put together. Whatever happened today, you’re right. That’s between the two of you, but don’t expect me to get in the middle. Nor am I going to champion your side. So what is it you want? For me to shake him until he agrees to stay?” Cain took her hands out of her coat pockets and spread them out, obviously frustrated.
“I want to talk to you and not have you sound like you hate me. I want for our son to look at me like I’m a member of his family, like I’m his mother and not some woman he has to spend time with because that’s what you expect. I want him to want to please me as much as he lives to please you.” Her voice started to sound ragged even to her own ears by the time Emma was done.
The stream of air that left Cain’s mouth smoked the air at least two feet in front of her. “You could’ve had all that and more, and you know it. You left for your own reasons, none of which were me asking you to go. In fact, if memory serves me correctly it was me who asked you to stay. You want him to look at you and treat you like you’re his mother. You should’ve sent him a letter now and then. What I did four years ago was a mistake, but I’m not making any more where you’re concerned. I’ll give you the morning to convince him to stay, if you can. After that I’m taking him home, if that’s what he wants.”
“What do you mean you made a mistake?” Emma wondered if Cain really regretted killing the man for what he’d tried to do.
“I listened to you, and I let him live. It’s a mistake that has cost me dearly.”
Just as quickly Emma realized Cain was still a heartless liar. What she had put into motion didn’t seem so horrible now.
Chapter Nine
Merrick was sitting on Cain’s bunk when her boss stepped back into the room and watched as she stripped off her hat, gloves, and coat. She enjoyed looking at the long, denim-wrapped legs since she rarely saw Cain in anything other than a business suit. They shared a close relationship, but she had never been able to convince Cain to cross the line and add being lovers to their list of accomplishments. She knew what Cain needed was a woman like Emma, but one who thought like her when it came to business and family. Merrick loved and accepted all of Cain, whereas Emma obviously could only stomach the soft and gentle parts. Emma had never sat back and learned, like Merrick, that it was Cain’s strength for all things that made her incredibly attractive.