“They didn’t take anything?” I asked.
He shook his head. “But that doesn’t mean anything. Chances are it’s just some bored kids. No need to worry.”
I mentioned that it might make sense to call the investigation off.
“No,” he said. “Even if it was somehow related—and I don’t know how, ‘cause we’ve been careful—even if it was, it wasn’t nothing more than a scare tactic. They know they can’t harm a cop.”
“Yeah, but I don’t…”
“Like I said, probably unrelated,” he interrupted. “We keep going forward just like we planned. But just in case, you and me aren’t gonna meet anymore until you hear from Korman. Minimize contact. Just a good practice.”
I agreed not to contact him until Korman turned up with something. I paid for the drinks.
Second, Adeline showed up to my apartment again, drunk, unannounced, and looking to hook up. It was 10 p.m. When I heard her knock, I jumped an inch off the love seat, and my eyes darted toward the bedside nightstand that held the .45.
I carefully looked through the peephole and saw her leaning on the door, eyes half closed.
“I’ve missed you,” she said when I let her in. Her breath smelled of sour mash.
“What are you doing here?”
She scoffed. “Have you gotten stupid, Julian?” She walked to my fridge for a beer.
“You can’t stay.”
She swayed around the kitchen and searched for a bottle opener.
“I told you last time, no more,” I said.
“You said that many times,” she said to the counter.
“This time I meant it.”
She found the opener and took a slug off the bottle, then walked back toward me. Slowly and wobbly.
“You keep lying to yourself,” she said, eyes looking into mine.
“No, you do.”
She laughed and grabbed the front of my shirt. She leaned in. “Come on,” she whispered. “You know you want to.”
I’d always given in to her. Willingly at first, excitedly even, and reluctantly in the later days, but I’d always given in. Because I wanted it, and because it was easy. I still wanted it, still desired her body next to mine, and it was still easy. But the reward was no longer worth the attachments. The juice was no longer worth the squeeze. Her power over me would continue until I decided it wouldn’t, and it had been that simple the entire time.
I denied her again, pushing her away and telling her whatever we had was over, and her anger bubbled. She yelled. I asked her to keep her voice down. She did not.
“Just who the fuck do you think you are,” she said. It was a statement, not a question.
“This was never right,” I said, normal volume. “You know that.”
“And since when do you care about moral high ground? Since when?”
The sex wasn’t the issue. She wasn’t used to hearing “no.”
“You need to think very carefully about what you’re doing,” she said, her voice coming down a little. “Very carefully. I could ruin you.”
“Could you?”
She threw her hands up. “How dumb are you, really?”
“I know you can’t tell anyone,” I said. “About us. You wouldn’t do that. Vince finding out would be as damaging to you as it would to me.”
“You actually believe that?”
“I do.”
“Then you’ve made a big mistake, Julian. You’re ruining yourself and I don’t even give a shit.”
“You won’t tell him,” I said.
She shrugged. “I tried to explain it to you once. That I’m in control. Here and elsewhere. He’s no more powerful than I am.”
“Don’t kid yourself.”
She smiled a wide, devious smile that would stay with me. I would remember the smile.
“Have a nice night, Julian. Take care of yourself.”
The third important thing that happened in the six days until Dallas Korman contacted me again was Vince meeting me face to face. This occurred the day after my confrontation with Adeline, and as such, if he had summoned me to his office, I would not have gone. But he came to me.
48
There were two knocks at the door. Clean and quick, like a delivery driver. They startled me off the couch, where I was watching daytime television and debating the validity of Adeline’s threats. I was anxious, and desperately wanted to hear from Dallas Korman or Raphino. The .45 sat on the couch beside me.
If they were coming for me, they wouldn’t knock. This thought was the only thing that allowed me to approach the door.
When I saw him, I cracked the door slightly.
“Vince,” I said.
“Hello Julian.” He smiled. “We need to chat. The two of us.” He looked sleep deprived, but not angry.
“What about?”
“The polite thing to do would be to invite me in.”
I looked back inside at the gun on the couch. “I’m kind of in the middle of something.”
“Julian, I came all the way down.”
I looked back inside. “Give me a second.”
I stuffed the gun under the couch and let him in. We sat on folding chairs I used as a makeshift kitchen set. I asked if he wanted coffee and he politely declined.
He squared to me and looked me in the eye. “How is your state of mind?”
“Fine. Great.”
“You sure?”
The gun was too far away. I wanted it closer. It would be comforting if it was closer.
“Yes. Is my work suffering?”
“Of course not. Strong as usual. But work is the only place I’ve seen you. It’s the only place anyone has seen you. You have isolated yourself, it seems.”
I shrugged, hoping it seemed natural. “Not intentionally.”
His head nodded. “Your friends have left. I understand. It’s unfair, but sometimes things are out of our control.”
I nodded along. “Yes. Of course.”
He nodded too. We both nodded together. Two familiar souls, nodding, understanding one another.
“Our last real conversation was about repairing trust,” Vince said. “Do you remember this conversation?”
“I do.”
“And since that time, would you say the level of trust between us has improved?”
I nodded again. “I would. I would definitely say that.” My pulse slowed and my armpits stopped sweating. When I wasn’t wracked with anxiety, I could play the game.
He nodded. “I would agree.”
My pulse slowed more.
My work was impressive, he said, and he was happy with where the trust level was. Trust was important.
“There may even be some in our organization who aren’t so trustworthy,” he said.
“You think?”
He nodded. “I’m afraid so. To be dealt with when the time is right. But the important thing is we put those who are trustworthy into positions of power. You know what? Perhaps I will take you up on that cup of coffee.”
I started a pot brewing and sat back down.
“So,” I said, “trust.”
“Yes. Our mission was to repair trust between us. I would say that mission is complete. Now, it’s time to put your skills to better use.”
“What do you have in mind?”
He scooted the chair closer. “I need an assistant.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. Someone I can trust. As you know very well, our business growth has slowed recently. This needs to change. A stagnant business is a dying business.”
“I see.”
“Your intellect makes you valuable. I believe you could see things from a different angle than I. It could help the business. It could help us find where the leaks are.”
He stood up and walked toward the window, running his fingers between the cheap blinds.