I was silent for a few seconds. I longed to tell him. On impulse I had told Nanny Crockett, but then I had seen that she was emotionally involved and it was obvious that I had then taken a step in the right direction. I wavered.
But I was uncertain of Lucas. He should feel grateful to the man who had saved his life, but Lucas was a calm realist, and I was unsure of what action he would take.
He answered for me.
“After going through all that … well, it’s natural that you should feel unsettled. Life at home seems dull … well, predictable. You are reaching out for change. I can only think that it was that which made you take this ridiculous action.”
“I don’t see it as ridiculous, Lucas.”
“You get on so well with the twins and you and Nanny Crockett seem to be in some conspiracy or other. You’re always together.”
I caught my breath. Conspiracy? It was almost as though he guessed.
He said sharply: “How did you know that they wanted a governess at Perrivale? Through Nanny Crockett, I suppose. I’ve heard she is still friendly with someone up there.”
“Well, yes …”
“I thought so. And you concocted this between you. I tell you, it’s madness. That place! There’s something unsavoury about it since the murder. It’s not the sort of place you should go to. All that trouble and that woman being engaged to the victim and then promptly marrying the other…”
“That has nothing to do with the governess.”
“Governess!” he said contemptuously. ‘yom a governess! “
“Why not?”
“You’re not the type.”
“What types are governesses? There are all sorts, I do assure you.”
“Well, you don’t fit into any of the categories. You’d better marry me.”
I stared at him.
“What did you say?”
“You’re restless. Since you’ve been back, everything seems dull after such hair-raising adventures as you have experienced.
You want something to happen. Very well. Marry me. “
I burst out laughing.
“Really, Lucas, who is being absurd now?”
“Still you. I’m as calm and sensible as ever. The more I think of the idea the more I like it.”
“You don’t care for me.”
“But I do. Next to myself I love you best in the world.”
That made me laugh again and I was glad of the light relief.
“I am not taking you seriously, of course,” I said, ‘but this must be the most unusual proposal anyone has ever received. “
“It’s honest, anyway.”
“Yes, I grant that.”
“And it is not so unusual either. It’s just that people don’t tell all the truth. Most people love themselves passionately and when they declare their love for someone it is always for their own comfort and pleasure. So you see, I am just the same as most other people except that I am more honest.”
“Oh, Lucas, it is good of you, but…”
“It’s not good at all and but… I knew there would be a but.”
“I really can’t take you seriously.”
“Why not? The more I think of it the better solution it seems. You are in the doldrums … which ever way you turn. Everything has changed for you. Your forthright aunt has entered your old home and changed it. You have recently come through an almost incredible adventure.
Nothing like it will ever happen to you again, so therefore life seems a little flat. You are not sure which way to turn. But turn you will anything . anywhere to take you out of the slough into which you have fallen. If governessing in a house of somewhat shady reputation is
considered, why not marriage with a curmudgeon who is a poor thing, but at least cares for you and understands? “
“You don’t put it very romantically.”
“We are not discussing romance but reality.”
I couldn’t help laughing again and he joined in with me.
“Oh come, Rosetta,” he said.
“Give up this mad idea … and at least consider the other proposition. It has certain advantages. We are good friends, aren’t we? We’ve faced death together. I understand you as few people ever will. And do you want to go back to Aunt Maud and her plans for you?”
“I certainly don’t want to do that,” I replied.
“You are right in a way. You do understand me … to some degree.”
“Then abandon this idea. I’ll send Dick Duvane over to Perrivale to tell them to look for a new governess. Think about what I suggested.
Stay here for a while. Let’s enlarge our acquaintance. You don’t need to leap into this. Let’s make plans. “
“You are so good to me, Lucas.”
I placed my hand in his and he put it to his lips.
“It’s true, you know, Rosetta,” he said earnestly.
“I am fond of you.”
“I really am second with you?”
He laughed and held me against him for a moment.
“But…” I went on.
“Yes, I know about that ” but”. You’re going to Perrivale, aren’t you?”
“I must, Lucas. There’s a reason.”
Warnings of danger flashed into my mind. Once again I was on the point of telling him why I must go to Perrivale. He would understand then.
He saw that I was really determined.
He said: “Well, I shall be close. We’ll meet at The Sailor King. And when you find it quite unbearable, you only have to walk out and come to Trecorn.”
“That is a great comfort to me,” I told him.
“And, Lucas … thank you for asking me. It means a great deal to me.”
“It’s not the last time I shall ask. There’ll be others. I don’t give in as easily as that.”
“It was a great surprise to me. I think it was to you.”
“Oh, it has been smouldering in my mind for a long time … even on the island perhaps …”
“Do you think often of that time now?”
“It’s always there … in the background. I am constantly ready to be reminded. I often think of John Player, too. It would be interesting to know what happened to him.”
I was silent, apprehensive as I always was when he referred to Simon.
“I wonder if he is still in the seraglio. Poor devil. He came out the worst of the three of us … though none emerged unscathed.”
His face had hardened. The grudge against fate for making a cripple of a healthy man was never far away.
“I’d give a good deal to know what became of him,” he went on.
“We must remember we should not be here if it were not for him,” I said.
“Perhaps one day we shall hear some thing.”
“I doubt it. When that sort of thing happens people disappear from your life.”
“We didn’t disappear, Lucas.”
“It is rather miraculous that we are here like this.”
“Perhaps he will come back, too.”
“If he escaped … which seems impossible.”
“I did, Lucas.”
“That’s quite a story, but who is going to let him out? No, we shall never see him again. Yes … while we were there … that island . the three of us … we became very close to each other. But that is over now. We’ve got to grow away from it. And let me tell you, you’ll do that far better as Mrs. Lucas Lorimer than as governess to some hateful little brat in a household which was once the centre of a murder case.”
“We shall have to see, Lucas,” I said.
My first days at Perrivale Court were so crowded with impressions and suppressed emotions that they left me quite bewildered. The house itself was fascinating. It was full of unexpected features. It seemed vast, like a medieval castle in some places, a Tudor manor in others, and in some rooms a note of modernity had crept in.
Lady Perrivale had greeted me warmly but briefly and had handed me over to Mrs. Ford, who from the first showed herself to be my ally. I was her protegee; she had won the gratitude of Lady Perrivale for producing me and she was going to take me under her wing and do her utmost to keep me in the house.