“Actually,” Laurie said, “I did look into your theory. And what I learned was that you knew so little about your own girlfriend that you had no idea what she was working on. Her professor even confirmed that Susan’s research had nothing to do with the idea that became REACH.”
“Professors don’t know anything about who their students really are. Dwight followed Susan around like a lapdog. It seemed like every time I’d come by her dorm, he’d be lingering nearby. I don’t care how much money he’s made. I’m telling you: something was off about that kid.”
“You sound desperate, Keith.”
He shook his head. “Check it out if you don’t believe me. You know, when I said I’d do this, you told me you’d be objective, that you were a reporter at heart. But it’s obvious that Rosemary’s infected your brain about me. I’m out of here.”
“We’re just asking questions,” she said. “And you signed a contract.”
“Then sue me.”
The jingle of the bell as he exited felt like a buzzer ending a boxing round that Laurie knew she had lost.
41
Keith could feel his cell phone shake in his hand. It had been years since he’d lost control. He certainly could not recall ever speaking to Martin Collins so firmly. “I can’t do it. You should have heard the way they were running down AG. I couldn’t control my anger. I had to leave to keep myself from saying more than I should.”
“Of all people, Keith, don’t you think I know what it is like to have our beliefs belittled by people who can never understand our good works?”
Keith should have known that Martin would not accept his decision, but Martin didn’t understand his frustration. Keith had heard the ridicule in Laurie Moran’s voice when she mentioned Advocates for God. She could never begin to understand how AG had saved him after Susan died.
Service to others and guidance from Martin as to the certainty of God’s goodness had kept Keith from taking out his grief through booze and girls. And then there were the group sessions. Keith began to examine his guilt at treating Susan poorly when she was alive. He realized that all his betrayals were little acts of revenge. As much as he loved Susan, she made him feel small. He remembered how other couples in high school would talk about being treated like honorary family by one another’s parents. His friend Brian even got birthday and Christmas presents from his girlfriend Becky’s family.
But Keith had never gotten the slightest sign of approval-let alone affection-from Rosemary or Jack Dempsey. Jack worked so hard, he probably wouldn’t have been able to pick Keith from a lineup. And Rosemary? She treated Keith like dirt, with her constant sighs of disappointment and barbed comments insulting his dream of being a star.
Susan always told him to ignore it. She said her mother was just protective and would have had the same response if Susan were to date a prince who was also a Rhodes scholar. But, after Susan’s murder, Keith realized that he had absorbed the criticism. Hurting Susan-having power over her-had been a way to keep her from hurting him.
Now Keith felt like Rosemary Dempsey was calling the shots all over again. He tried once more to explain it all to Martin.
“The way that television producer spoke to me brought back all my old insecurities. And the way they talked about AG reminded me of how Susan would call it a scam when Nicole first became involved.”
“You didn’t give them any indication that it was Nicole who introduced you to the church, did you?”
“Of course not.”
“Remember, if they ask, you were handed a flyer on campus and were curious. With all the pamphleting I did back then, it’s perfectly believable. Do not say anything to link Nicole with AG.”
“I won’t be saying anything at all. I don’t want to be part of that show.”
“You know better than this. Sometimes it’s not about you, Keith. How are you best positioned to serve the work of God?”
“How can it be God’s work to be in a house full of people who make fun of everything our church stands for?”
“A house?”
“Yes, they have a house for filming. They’re also going to be staying there.” He retrieved the address from his pocket and read it to Martin.
“Listen to me: you will call the producer and confirm your participation. Advocates for God is a group serving God, and Nicole’s participation in this show is a direct threat to that group. I have reason to believe that Nicole isn’t saying anything about us for now, but the television show may be digging into Nicole’s background.”
“ ‘Reason to believe’?”
“I’m relying on you to update me about her involvement and to steer the investigation away from anything that might lead to AG. Do you understand?”
Sometimes Keith wondered whether he should be more questioning of Martin’s commands. But without Advocates for God, what would he have?
42
Determined to stick to her family’s postdinner board game ritual, Laurie gathered the crew in the den of the Bel Air house to play Bananagrams, which was like Scrabble on speed. Timmy’s favorite moments of the game were the banana-related puns: “split” to start playing and “peel” to pull new tiles. Grace had won the last three games in a row, each time telling Timmy that she might not have been the smartest person in the room, but that she was the most competitive person in the entire world, “and that matters more in the long run.”
Laurie could tell that both Timmy and Leo approved.
Everyone was playing except for Jerry, who was hunkered in a chair by the fireplace, working on plans for next week’s summit sessions.
“Take a little break,” Leo said. “Your eyes are going to cross.”
“Can’t take a break when you live with your boss.” Jerry looked up from his notes and winked at Timmy, who laughed at the joke.
Laurie thought that if anyone should have been working late tonight, it was her. She had blown the meeting with Keith Ratner today. The man was arrogant, but he had a point. Rosemary was so convinced that Keith was involved in Susan’s death, but was her suspicion based in fact or on her belief that Susan never would have gone to Los Angeles in the first place if not for her boyfriend? And would anyone have even questioned his alibi if it had come from six members of a book club or established group, instead of Advocates for God?
She was supposed to be spelling out words with her tiles, but she kept hearing Keith’s voice: You told me you’d be objective. Objective reporting meant checking his alibi.
She excused herself to make a phone call. She looked up the phone number for the church of Advocates for God and received a message system. “This is Laurie Moran, calling for Reverend Collins.” She had read that Martin Collins was the founder and minister of Advocates for God. Though the alibi witnesses who had spoken to police were all individual church members, she had to believe that Collins would have been aware of the situation given the group’s relatively small size at the time and the high-profile nature of the investigation. “It’s about a church member named Keith Ratner and a police investigation from 1994. If he could return my call, I’d appreciate it.”
Laurie was heading back to the makeshift game room when Jerry waved her over to his corner.
“You really should hang it up for the night,” she said. “I’m starting to feel guilty.”
“Then you have no idea how late I usually work in New York. Besides, this is fun. I was just going through old copies of the UCLA newspaper that I downloaded onto my computer. I thought it might be worth exploring the aftermath of Susan’s killing on the campus. Were students afraid? Did the university add security? That kind of thing.”